What to expect

My Grandmother was diagnosed with cancer in 2009, since then, she had surgery to remove part of the liver after it metastized, she has undergone every type of chemo that treats colon cancer, and even with all that, the cancer has just grown. It is now in her lungs, liver, and stomach. It was decided in August to stop all treatment and hospice came in. Since then we have ridden an awful roller coaster. She will be ok one day and vomiting and on the verge of dying the next. They switched her from morphine to methadone. We have had 5 months since treatments were stopped. I have read so much about the signs of dying, the stages of dying when the end is near, but we just never really know what is going on! She forces herself to eat because I come to visit everyday for lunch, we have celebrated 104 lunches together! The hospice nurse is really no help, every time she gets real sick, they simply increase the methodone and tell my aunt to give her more adavan. 

Has anyone been through this, any advice? This roller coaster is so hard and I have tried to be a rock for both my Grandma and my aunt who is her caregiver. I love my Grandmother so very much! 


  • Trubrit
    Trubrit Member Posts: 5,643 Member

    It sounds like your grandmother has a real fighting spirit and that is why she continues her journey. 

    I can only imagine the stress on those who love and care for her, and pray that you will all find the strenght you need to keep your spirits up during this time of passing. 

    If only love could keep those around us here. 

    I hope someone can help you by sharing their experiences. Sadly I cannot help. I was not even in the same country at the time my own mother passed slowly to the other side. 

    My thoughts are with you. 

  • tootsie1
    tootsie1 Member Posts: 5,044 Member
    I have not been through this,

    I have not been through this, but I just want you to know that I'm sorry, and I'm praying for it to be easier for all of your family.




  • annalexandria
    annalexandria Member Posts: 2,571
    People can live a very long time on hospice...

    in fact, studies have shown that terminal cancer patients actually do better than those who are spending time in hospitals.  I watched my sister go through a similar process, and I have to say, it's not always easy going through the final phase of our journey on earth.  It's hard work, and there is only so much the hospice workers can do to make that work easier.  But the person you're dealing with doesn't sound very sensitive...can you ask for a different nurse?   Most hospices have several people on staff.  Sending hugs and strength your way~Ann Alexandria