Our beautiful Sarah

im am truely saden as i read this i am 25 and my husband is 29 he has stage 4 gbm, and this is it for him, he is on thickened fluids and minced food, i guess we r just waiting now for the angles to come get him.

Dear Edna,

I can barely write to you. When I read your caring bridge post I felt like I was having a heart attack. I am so sorry! I know the pain and anguish you went through. I felt (feel) like you, that the only good thing is that the suffering is over. 

We didn't have David embalmed either. No testing done, no more needles, cuts, injections, invasvie things. I felt like David did his part to further the medical community's knowledge of brain cancer. I finally felt like I had some control over what happened to him. We buried David in a little country pioneer cemetery near the area where I ride my horse. 

David's cousin in law, our church's worship leader, played the guitar and sang that song from Casting Crowns, "Praise You in the Storm" during David's memorial service. I know it should comfort me but I cry so hard every time I hear that song....

Please fight against second guessing yourself. I do that all the time...wondering if we should have declined the blood brain barrier, if we should have tried going to Duke or UCSF, if I should have given David more pain medicine, if we should have allowed the feeding tube to be placed..... But I know in my heart it would not have made a difference. 

May God give you and your family peace and comfort beyond anything you have ever experienced before. And please keep in touch.

Love and blessings, always,

Cindy

Dear Edna,

I was saddened to learn of Sarah's passing.  Please know you did everything you could for your daughter.  My prayers are for comfort for you and your family at this time. Parrish

Cancer is so unfair.  I do so admire your courage and your strtength.  Your postings and your willingness to share helps so many of us walking the same path today.

I do so believe that Sarah is happy now with no suffering.  Her spirit is free of the body that caused her such pain.  You now bear her suffering as well as your own.  How fortunate she was to have such a loving famiy -- there every minute to address her woes.  I know you gave her such happiness in her life -- and love.  Her spirit no longer remembers the suffering -- her spirit is full of the love and happiness that you provided for all of her life here on earth.  She is forever.  And you will see her again.  I feel certain.   

Please know that you are not alone.  There are so many of us out there -- hurting.

Though nothing can bring back the hour

Of splendour in the grass, of glory in the flower;

We will grieve not, rather find

Strength in what remains behind...

William Wordsworth

Oh my dear Edna, I know how intense your pain is. And also having regrets. Unfortunately, regrets are part of the grieving process. Please know that no matter what you did, you would have regrets because the outcome would have been the same. If you hadn't put in the feeding tube, then you would have wondered if doing so would have given her some more quality time. The awful truth is that we can't know these things. I do believe that our loved ones, as they are facing the end, seem to leave their physical bodies even before their physical ones shut down. They are surrounded by loved ones who have gone before, and looking down with love at those of us left behind, knowing in their hearts that we will all be united again someday.

Of course, this doesn't ease the pain of losing your precious Sarah. It is a dark valley that we have to walk through. I hope and pray that as you begin this grief journey, you will feel her comforting presence guide you.

Connie

mother of David

2/28/77-4/14/12

Our hearts break as I read about your lovely Sarah.  Please know as a mother you were exceptional in her care, and that

she loved you for that.  Praying for you to beable to be comforted, along with your family.  May you find peace and remember

the good times shared with Sarah, you shall carry those memories in your heart forever. 

    Dear Lord,

      Please help me in this time of loss and overwhelming grief.  I don't understand why my life is filled with this pain and heartache.  But I turn

my eyes to you as I seek to find the strength to trust in your faithfulness.  I will wait on you and  not dispair; I will quietly wait for your salvation.

My heart is crushed, but I know that you will not abandon me forever.  Please show me your compassion, Lord.  Help through the pain so that

I will hope in you again.  I believe this promise in your Word to send me fresh mercy each day.  Though I can't see past today, I trust your great

love will never fail me.  Amen  

Lamentations 3:22-26; 31-32

God Bless !

Carol and Benjamin

* Benjamin had another clean checkup- doctor's called him boring again. Yeah!

I really was afraid to look on here, so didnt want to know of Sarah's passing. I am so sorry. Please don't second guess your self. I have followed your posted for a long time.You are a wonderful mother. Your gave this your all...Your love shows through. God blessed Sarah with you as her mother, she was truly blessed.

Love Brenda