Tom passed early this evening

oriontj
oriontj Member Posts: 375
edited January 2013 in Esophageal Cancer #1

Tom passed quietly this evening at our local hospital.  He knew people this morning and I prayed our oldest son would get here in time to see his father. He had to go from Maine on the bus down to Boston to come of O'Hare and drive in. My prayers were ansered. Steve came in at 3:00. I had been telling Tom all day to hang in there that Stevie was coming and he did.  He softly said Stevie as Steven hugged and held him in his arms.  He knew him. After that he didn't speak and didn't recognize anyone.  I took the boys for dinner no one had eaten.  We had all said good bye..and when our youngest came back to his room, he knew he was gone.  He left to be with Jesus. He has no pain now he left that with us.  Whenever tee off time he'll be the first one in line.

Tom battled ec since July 2009 and was fine for a year. It came back and they battled it back again. But the chemo took it's toll with neurophy.  His body wore out from the chemo and procedures and it became harder for him to fight. He didn't give up but his body did.

We already discussed what he wanted.  He will have a closed casket, an hour visitation at the Church and then the Funeral Mass. He will be creamated.  After Mass will have a luncheon.

Our youngest son lives with me so I'm not alone. The boys signed the papers.  Our oldest is an author and will write the obituary.

It will be strange for him not to be here. We were married 45 years December 2nd. Our three shelties have been looking for him.

I'm still shocked.  Not that he passed, I knew that would happen but that it turned so quickly and then he was gone.

 

Please keep him your prayers. I'm a tough person, so I'll make it through the bad spots that I know are coming with the help of Jesus and my son and friends.

thanks for the support through the years.

 

jan

 

Tom....May 7, 1942- January 11, 2012

 

 

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Comments

  • Firefighter Jon
    Firefighter Jon Member Posts: 10
    #2
    Tom

    Dear Jan,

    My deepest sympathy to you  and your family.  All of Toms pain and grief are over he is safely home in heaven.

    Prayers and Hugs

    Bev and Firefighter Jon

  • bingbing2009
    bingbing2009 Member Posts: 177
    #3
    Deepest Condolences

     

    Jan, I am so sorry to hear of Tom's passing. How wonderful that your oldest son was able to get there in time to say goodbye, though. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.

    Melinda

  • Josie60
    Josie60 Member Posts: 80
    #4
    So sorry to hear of your

    So sorry to hear of your loss.

  • joymitch
    joymitch Member Posts: 16
    #5
    prayers are with you

    My prayers will be with you through these difficult days.  I am glad you have faith in Christ.  He is the strength we all need.

  • tb7
    tb7 Member Posts: 52
    #6
    So many thoughts . . .

    So sad to read your posting about Tom, Jan.  My thoughts will be with you and your family (and the shelties also).  I never quite know what to say, but I hope you will do well in the time ahead and take some time for you, to do whatever you want or feel like doing.  Glad you have your son living with you, the dogs will be great to keep you company as well. 

    Hugs and condolences,

    Trisha 

  • lindadanis
    lindadanis Member Posts: 235
    #7
    Dear Jan, although we do not

    Dear Jan, although we do not know eachother, I was just reading about your husband who passed recently to this cancer.  I, too, lost my husband back in 2010 of the same cancer.  I, too, had three shelties, one of which has passed away, and was reading that you also have shelties.

     

    I am so sorry of your loss and if you ever need someone to talk to, please contact me.  I live In Massachusetts.

     

    Linda

  • lindadanis
    lindadanis Member Posts: 235
    #8
    Dear Jan, although we do not

    Dear Jan, although we do not know eachother, I was just reading about your husband who passed recently to this cancer.  I, too, lost my husband back in 2010 of the same cancer.  I, too, had three shelties, one of which has passed away, and was reading that you also have shelties.

     

    I am so sorry of your loss and if you ever need someone to talk to, please contact me.  I live In Massachusetts.

     

    Linda

  • Amjosmom
    Amjosmom Member Posts: 212
    #9
    I'm so sorry.
    Such sad news. I'm very sorry for your loss.
  • paul61
    paul61 Member Posts: 1,392 Member
    #10
    I am so sorry of hear of Tom's passing

    Jan,

    I am sorry to hear that Tom has left us. He had a long battle and thankfully some good times along the way. I am glad he got to see all his family before he left. May God gather him in his loving arms and bring him home, and may he provide peace to you and your family during this difficult time.

    With my condolances,

    Paul Adams

    McCormick, South Carolina

     

  • o2bnsf
    o2bnsf Member Posts: 19
    #11
    Amjosmom said:

    I'm so sorry.
    Such sad news. I'm very sorry for your loss.

    So sorry

    I did not know you but I feel for your loss.

  • jaycc
    jaycc Member Posts: 122
    #12
    Heaven has no cancer

    Jan,

    My prayers go out to you and the boys, you are so brave to write to us so soon.  Since you mentioned Jesus, today is the closing of the Christmas season, and I believe there is no cancer in heaven, and may the warmth of the season help your across these days. My husband wishes were also to be creamated. a good gift to us from him. it made things more a celebration of his life at our church and the luncheon.

  • AngieD
    AngieD Member Posts: 493
    #13
    I am so sorry to hear of your

    I am so sorry to hear of your loss, Jan, but I am so thankful your oldest son made it in time and Tom knew he was there.  I have tears in my eyes just reading that.  You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers in the days and weeks to come.

    Angie

  • i35chica
    i35chica Member Posts: 16
    #14
    Prayers for Comfort

    Our hearts are with you and the family. Cyber hugs from Texas. 

  • Rickyr1219
    Rickyr1219 Member Posts: 53
    #15
    So Sorry for your Loss

    So sorry to hear about Tom and at the same time I was encouraged by all of you getting to see him before he passed.  I know our God is greater than any disease and although we are sad here there is rejoicing in Heaven.

  • BMGky
    BMGky Member Posts: 621
    #16
    Our deepest condolences

    We are so sorry to hear of your loss.  Thank you for sharing your family's last moments with him.  He was comforted as were you.

    BMGky

  • Donna70
    Donna70 Member Posts: 852 Member
    #17
    BMGky said:

    Our deepest condolences

    We are so sorry to hear of your loss.  Thank you for sharing your family's last moments with him.  He was comforted as were you.

    BMGky

    so sorry

    Dear Jan,

    So sorry to hear that Tom has passed but glad that he was not in pain and got to see Steven before he went. My thoughts and prayers will be with you and your family. You are a woman of faith and hopefully, God will give the strength to get thru these future days. take care,

    Donna70

  • ritawaite13
    ritawaite13 Member Posts: 236
    #18
    Jan,

    I pray good memories will bring you comfort in the days to come.

    Rita

  • ritawaite13
    ritawaite13 Member Posts: 236
    #19
    Facebook group

    Hi Jan,

    I know your brain is mush right now and I understand. I posted on manda's question about a facebook group and would like to extend the invitation to you too. You will recognize many names from here. It's a private group so you have to be added by one of the members if you're interested. Please just email me on this site if you'd like to reconnect with others from here who've also lost their husbands to this beast we call EC.

    Sending you a cyber ((hug)).

    Rita

     

  • TerryV
    TerryV Member Posts: 887
    #20
    Condolences!

    I am so sorry to read of Tom's passing.  Glad that it was peaceful and that he was able to be alert and aware until Steven arrived.  What a blessing for Steven to know that his dad recognized him.

    Please know our throught and prayers are with you.  If you need anything, please don't hesitate to reach out to the FB group as well.  We understand.....

    {HUGS}

    TerryV
    PROUD wife to Nick, age 49
    Lost EC battle, June 19, 2012

  • TerryV
    TerryV Member Posts: 887
    #21
    Condolences!

    I am so sorry to read of Tom's passing.  Glad that it was peaceful and that he was able to be alert and aware until Steven arrived.  What a blessing for Steven to know that his dad recognized him.

    Please know our throught and prayers are with you.  If you need anything, please don't hesitate to reach out to the FB group as well.  We understand.....

    {HUGS}

    TerryV
    PROUD wife to Nick, age 49
    Lost EC battle, June 19, 2012

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