Why should my hair be such an issue

I completely understand
I completely understand Charlie. Men or women have a great identity with our hair. I also didn't reconize the person in the mirror at first. I thought to myself what can I do? SO I decided to embrace it ( as best I could ) and look at it like a sign of my strength and my great fight ahead. It was almost like my badge of honor although I know that sounds weird. For me, it was the best way to deal with it.

Also you can wear some cool kerchiefs on your head like the bikers or young people wear. I wore big earrings and more makeup which was fun. I have my hair back now and remember how easy it was to never have a "Bad" hair day.

Best of luck Charlie and you will find a way to deal with it that's best for you.

Big Hugs,
Wanda

I think that what you are
I think that what you are feeling is very, very normal. Hair is not just a vanity issue. It is a symbol of health and, when it is gone, everyone knows that we are sick. I think that was the hardest thing of all for me to deal with--I just wanted my family aware and wanted the rest of the world to leave me alone.

We all feel so differently though and I couldn't be prouder of our brothers and sisters who go bald proudly. I never had the courage, I am ashamed to say.

And I don't even like my hair as I am the one and only woman in the family with curly hair-I always dreamed of straight hair.

I wore a wig (I thought it was hideous) and cried a lot; that is how I dealt. I am such a wimp! Being a guy, even though so many are naturally bald, is still hard, because it is not YOU!

The good news is that it really will grow back and this will all be behind you. Big (((hugs))). Hang in there!

I get it!
I am really really thankful to have my health, but with my hair growing back in now, gray and curlyish and with fuzzy tips, I STILL don't recognize myself in the mirror, I also hate that my eyebrows have not come back yet! Its ok. I think Cynthia is correct that our hair is also an indicator of our health... I don't feel completely well yet as I have not gotten back to seeing me in the mirror! Don't feel like you should not miss your hair! We all feel the same pretty much.
Sandy

JanPat said:

You're not alone
Losing my hair was extremely traumatic for me. I had a very thick head full of curls and more curls which had brought many complaints over the years. The morning my husband had to shave my head for me we both sobbed. Even now that it is coming back it is still difficult because it is so short and growing very slowly because all the curls are back and it is hard to tell there is any length with it so tightly curled. I definitely was not one of the brave that could toss caution to the wind and go without anything on my head. It seems like it shouldn't be that big a deal but it is!!! Please hang in there and know that you are not the only that has had to fight the anger and embarrassment that this unpleasant stage can bring.

Correction
Compliments not complaints .... Good grief, I don't understand why my IPad can't think for me. :-)

We All Seem to Work Through It
I was not happy with the prospect of losing my hair. I know that a lot of it is that to me I felt like I no longer had control over who knew about my plight. Anyone who saw me would know -- even people I do not know.

I think that one thing which helped me work through the process was when I had my friend Becky come over, when my hair was beginning to come lose, and give me a buzz cut. I thought bristles would be easier to contend with than hair.

Then I had to decide what I was going to do when I was out in public -- hat or hair. I seemed to want to avoid my wig, although there was no reason to. I finally decided that was ridiculous, as the places I was going to regularly (church, local store, etc.) were where I was known and the "regulars" there knew I had no hair. It was me. It wasn't a vanity thing. I just was no longer in control of who knew.

When I finally listened to myself, then I was fine. Afterall, what choices did I have? With the drugs I was on, hair loss was a given. I can't tell you how many times I told myself -- even with this -- JUST DEAL WITH IT. EVENTUALLY IT WILL BE A THING OF THE PAST. BUT FOR NOW" YOU DON'T HAVE MUCH OF A CHOICE!

It was ok.

The other thing that helped me a lot was that I managed to maintain a sense of humor -- not that I laughed all the time about things or made smart remarks, but I sometimes did find myself amused at my fate.

I get it!
When I heard I was going to have chemo and I was going to lose my hair, I felt more upset over the hair loss than almost anything else. I was the Blond girl (my true hair color was platinum blond) - it was my one feature that set me apart. I hate the dumb blond jokes to the nth degree. It was terrible knowing it was going to fall out. My hairdresser met us (my husband came with me) before salon hours and cut my hair very short when it started to come out - we all stood there crying. A few days later my husband and I took turns shaving it off. I finally had some control over something. My journey with head covers started. I hated the wig we went to all lengths (ha ha) to find so I was on the hunt for unique hats and scarves. I settled on a few that I was comfortable in. I have a huge plastic box full of them. I've been scared to get rid of them for fear then I'd need them again - kinda silly. I had a funny experience at the grocery store - I was having a horrendous hot flash and I just stood there and popped my hat off. I took the cashier off guard. I still have a chuckle over the look on her face. Somewhere, you've got to find the humor in all this. It does grow back - mine is white and gray and I'm leaving it that way. I feel it's my badge of honor. I like it short and easy too. Who knew?

I wish the best to you!
Karen