stage 4 lung cancer - please give me hope

djs123
djs123 Member Posts: 102
I started out on the prostate discussion board because my husband was diagnosed with advanced aggressive prostate cancer in January of this year. He had 40 radiation treatments and has been on hormone therapy for 8 months.
He came down with what we thought was a cold in August that never went away. After several doctors visits, tests & lung biopsy, we found out yesterday that he has stage 4 large neuroendocrine cancer (a form of lung cancer), only 5% of lung cancers are this type. It has also spread to his bones. He is having an mri next week to see if it's in his brain and a bone biopsy which will determine if the primary cancer is the lung (which is suspected and worse) or the prostate.
Either way he will start chemo hopefully before the end of next week. I pray the brain has not been affected.

He is such a proud strong man, it's killing me to see him going through this. He's the one everyone always leans on and now he's in such trouble. I don't want him to have pain and I understand from the web (which I'm beginning to hate) that both lung and bone cancer are very painful.

I have a positive attitude and am very hopeful but would appreciate any advice from anyone out there that can tell me how to best support him. He is very quiet, not demonstrative, doesn't cry, is very proud and strong and nternalizes everything and mostly keeps saying he doesn't want anyone to feel sorry for him. I'm helpless to know how to help him.

Thanks for listening. I hate that I'm on a discussion board like this, but very grateful that it exists, otherwise I think I'd be more overwhelmed than I already feel.

Comments

  • z
    z Member Posts: 1,414 Member
    djs123
    Hello, I'm so sorry you had to find us. Another great web site for lung cancer is Inspire. I visit it because there are more responses and a lot of information. I was a 1a lung cancer, so I didn't need chemo. So I am not much help in what the chemo is that he will be having. There is always hope. There are many pain medicines that will help your husband should he need them. I hope others will post. I wish you and your husband well, and I'm sorry you are here. Lori
  • patric
    patric Member Posts: 5
    Hope
    I only know that conventional treatments don't offer much help. Still, it is necessary to exhaust every alternative. I suggest to look at cancertutor online. They have many alternative suggestions, and they're honest, at least that's my sense of it. With stage 4, you have no time to waste.
    Other than that, nutrition is critical, and organic foods, greens an absolute...also cut out all sugar and reduce carbs, as it is the nourishment cancer needs to grow.
    There are hundreds of alternative/integrative methods to potentiate chemotherapy, reduce side effects and slow the progress of cancer growth. Some are noted to force apoptosis (cancer cell death).
    A great book on Amazon is, Natural Strategies for Cancer Patients.
    The goal is to stop the spread and contain the cancer until you can put a program in place. It doesn't cost thousands. as I have learned by spending many thousands. I am more than willing to share my knowledge.
    My son, with stage 4 lung cancer is stable and feeling good, one year out. He was told, maybe 2 or 3 months.
    It's taken that year to develop a plan, but it's working...so says his oncologist.
    He is one, and I know of others who are working on staying healthy.
    I suggest looking at google scholar for MCP (modified citrus pectin) It has a lot to offer, mostly that it stops metastasis, clears the body of heavy metals and contributes to bowel regularity. Also check out LDN, low dose naltrexone, there is a web site. It takes awhile to work, but looks good. There is no one approach. It is a combination of many, including chemo. The options are mind boggling and overwhelming, believe me, I've been there. I'd start with a good diet as above and MCP, whey protein, super greens, it can and must taste good.
    I'm available to help. My email is pafogg@gmail.com
  • djs123
    djs123 Member Posts: 102
    patric said:

    Hope
    I only know that conventional treatments don't offer much help. Still, it is necessary to exhaust every alternative. I suggest to look at cancertutor online. They have many alternative suggestions, and they're honest, at least that's my sense of it. With stage 4, you have no time to waste.
    Other than that, nutrition is critical, and organic foods, greens an absolute...also cut out all sugar and reduce carbs, as it is the nourishment cancer needs to grow.
    There are hundreds of alternative/integrative methods to potentiate chemotherapy, reduce side effects and slow the progress of cancer growth. Some are noted to force apoptosis (cancer cell death).
    A great book on Amazon is, Natural Strategies for Cancer Patients.
    The goal is to stop the spread and contain the cancer until you can put a program in place. It doesn't cost thousands. as I have learned by spending many thousands. I am more than willing to share my knowledge.
    My son, with stage 4 lung cancer is stable and feeling good, one year out. He was told, maybe 2 or 3 months.
    It's taken that year to develop a plan, but it's working...so says his oncologist.
    He is one, and I know of others who are working on staying healthy.
    I suggest looking at google scholar for MCP (modified citrus pectin) It has a lot to offer, mostly that it stops metastasis, clears the body of heavy metals and contributes to bowel regularity. Also check out LDN, low dose naltrexone, there is a web site. It takes awhile to work, but looks good. There is no one approach. It is a combination of many, including chemo. The options are mind boggling and overwhelming, believe me, I've been there. I'd start with a good diet as above and MCP, whey protein, super greens, it can and must taste good.
    I'm available to help. My email is pafogg@gmail.com

    hope thanks you
    thanks so much, I may be emailing you directly to find out what your plan is. I'm sorry to hear about your son, but happy he doing well, God bless. The struggle I have with my husband is he does not believe anything other than what a doctor tells him and he is not open to other therapies. I will explore the information you gave me and share it with him. At this point in time he is so frightened, I'm hoping he will be open to all..
  • patric
    patric Member Posts: 5
    djs123 said:

    hope thanks you
    thanks so much, I may be emailing you directly to find out what your plan is. I'm sorry to hear about your son, but happy he doing well, God bless. The struggle I have with my husband is he does not believe anything other than what a doctor tells him and he is not open to other therapies. I will explore the information you gave me and share it with him. At this point in time he is so frightened, I'm hoping he will be open to all..

    It's typical
    Many, if not most people are so frightened by the diagnosis that they surrender all power to the person they believe may save them.
    Doctors, all to often play into that scenario, instead of encouraging the patient to remain in control. It's a little like a codependent relationship.

    Your husband needs to take control of his life, by doing research, talking to people on this site, setting up a diet for himself, doing daily exercise. People with cancer who exercise, have a better quality of life and live longer. These are small things that will help him to regain control. It is imperative.

    You can encourage him to make small changes in his diet. The one book I always advise..Natural Strategies for Cancer Patients. Written by a researcher, MD, neurologist, oncologist, or some one he might pay attention to. The book can be ordered on Amazon, for about $15.00.
    It is more than worth the price. In it, you'll find all the information you need for now.

    First stop all sugar and reduce carbs to under 25 per day. It's hard to do, but it will slow down the cancer's progression.
    If you add things slowly, it will give him time to adjust.

    Best..Pat
  • dennycee
    dennycee Member Posts: 857 Member
    Welcome to the ACS Lung Cancer board
    As you are already finding out, there are many caring and wonderful people here. That includes survivors and caretakers. Me, I was told 25 months ago that I had 10 maybe 15 months left WITH treatment. There are many on this board and over on the Inspire website (the one Z mentioned) who have survived stage 4 LC with mets to brain and other places for ten, fifteen and twenty years with good quality of life. Please add that site to the places you check, there is a thread section devoted entirely to neuroendocrine cancer of the lung. I have met many wonderful people on both sites.

    Please let us know what happens with the MRI and what type of chemo they are giving also if they plan to do radiation. I don't know if there is genetic testing done for target therapy on neuroendocrine type cancer (NETS) but I would be curious. Best regards.
  • djs123
    djs123 Member Posts: 102
    dennycee said:

    Welcome to the ACS Lung Cancer board
    As you are already finding out, there are many caring and wonderful people here. That includes survivors and caretakers. Me, I was told 25 months ago that I had 10 maybe 15 months left WITH treatment. There are many on this board and over on the Inspire website (the one Z mentioned) who have survived stage 4 LC with mets to brain and other places for ten, fifteen and twenty years with good quality of life. Please add that site to the places you check, there is a thread section devoted entirely to neuroendocrine cancer of the lung. I have met many wonderful people on both sites.

    Please let us know what happens with the MRI and what type of chemo they are giving also if they plan to do radiation. I don't know if there is genetic testing done for target therapy on neuroendocrine type cancer (NETS) but I would be curious. Best regards.

    survivors and encouragement
    Thank you for your posts. I will implement the changes in my husbands diet to eliminate sugars, he has always been an atkins man, but I feel that my have contributed to his problem. He really enjoys his vodka and I know he won't give that up. He is extremely depressed and in shock now and I certainly empathize as I who enjoy a glass or two of wine, drank an entire bottle last night. (Will never do that again, it was hard to stand through mass this morning!). but it was also something I kind of needed to do. I feel as thought I am living in fear and my husband seems paralyzed right now. I also know that it will take both of us time to digest all this terrible news and deal with it when we are able. I have decided I need to give him his time to digest all this scary stuff. I just hold him at night and ask God to bless and heal him and guide me as to how to best support him.
    I will post you on the results of the MRI on Tuesday, awful to say, since I'm always so positive, I'm fearful it will be in his brain too, no I can't even say that, so I will now take it back. His brain is healthy!
    Of course, all our loving friends are now sending miraculous stories of recoveries and suggestions, one of which is a book CANCER FREE" BY BILL HENDERSON. It seems ridiculously easy since in the reviews on Amazon, people have actually not done chemo or radiation and taken his dietary instructions instead. Does this make sense to anyone out there. Since I know my husband only follows what the doctors order, it's a non issue here. But I wonder, does anyone put any value into these things?

    I pray each of us gets through our journey with strength, love and the support we all need.
    God bless and thanks again, it so helps to have an outlet
  • djs123
    djs123 Member Posts: 102
    djs123 said:

    survivors and encouragement
    Thank you for your posts. I will implement the changes in my husbands diet to eliminate sugars, he has always been an atkins man, but I feel that my have contributed to his problem. He really enjoys his vodka and I know he won't give that up. He is extremely depressed and in shock now and I certainly empathize as I who enjoy a glass or two of wine, drank an entire bottle last night. (Will never do that again, it was hard to stand through mass this morning!). but it was also something I kind of needed to do. I feel as thought I am living in fear and my husband seems paralyzed right now. I also know that it will take both of us time to digest all this terrible news and deal with it when we are able. I have decided I need to give him his time to digest all this scary stuff. I just hold him at night and ask God to bless and heal him and guide me as to how to best support him.
    I will post you on the results of the MRI on Tuesday, awful to say, since I'm always so positive, I'm fearful it will be in his brain too, no I can't even say that, so I will now take it back. His brain is healthy!
    Of course, all our loving friends are now sending miraculous stories of recoveries and suggestions, one of which is a book CANCER FREE" BY BILL HENDERSON. It seems ridiculously easy since in the reviews on Amazon, people have actually not done chemo or radiation and taken his dietary instructions instead. Does this make sense to anyone out there. Since I know my husband only follows what the doctors order, it's a non issue here. But I wonder, does anyone put any value into these things?

    I pray each of us gets through our journey with strength, love and the support we all need.
    God bless and thanks again, it so helps to have an outlet

    eliminating sugar question?
    Does that mean no fruit or just eliminating most baked goods. Please clarify so I can get him started on the right track.
    Thanks
  • katenorwood
    katenorwood Member Posts: 1,912
    djs123 said:

    eliminating sugar question?
    Does that mean no fruit or just eliminating most baked goods. Please clarify so I can get him started on the right track.
    Thanks

    processed sugars
    djs123,
    hey there ! I'm new to the board but not new to cancer. I have been reading alot on sugars effect w/cancer. I think that we all need to eat to boost our immune systems (natural...normal...good). We do need natural sugars that fruits contain for our systems to function properly. It's a balance. I am reading into this myself that all the processed foods...aren't what we need in our diets. Just my uptake on it. I'm learning as I go, and will continue to ask. Hoping for the best out come for your husband ! Katie
  • djs123
    djs123 Member Posts: 102

    processed sugars
    djs123,
    hey there ! I'm new to the board but not new to cancer. I have been reading alot on sugars effect w/cancer. I think that we all need to eat to boost our immune systems (natural...normal...good). We do need natural sugars that fruits contain for our systems to function properly. It's a balance. I am reading into this myself that all the processed foods...aren't what we need in our diets. Just my uptake on it. I'm learning as I go, and will continue to ask. Hoping for the best out come for your husband ! Katie

    fruit
    Thanks Katie appreciate your input and good luck to you.
  • dennycee
    dennycee Member Posts: 857 Member

    processed sugars
    djs123,
    hey there ! I'm new to the board but not new to cancer. I have been reading alot on sugars effect w/cancer. I think that we all need to eat to boost our immune systems (natural...normal...good). We do need natural sugars that fruits contain for our systems to function properly. It's a balance. I am reading into this myself that all the processed foods...aren't what we need in our diets. Just my uptake on it. I'm learning as I go, and will continue to ask. Hoping for the best out come for your husband ! Katie

    Sugars
    Katie is right. Our healthy cells need sugars to reproduce and to do their jobs. Cancer cells do not discriminate about the types of sugar they get and they are greedy enough to take sugars away from healthy cells.
    Denny.
  • djs123
    djs123 Member Posts: 102
    Tomorrow brain mri
    Day by day....tomorrow is the MRI on the brain. I'm' praying it does not show up there. I'm afraid I will lose my mind if we keep getting more bad news. Firststhe prostate, then the lungs, then the bone.....not the brain please!
    Biopsy of the bone has not yet been scheduled. Want to get these tests done so my husband can start getting chemo. I feel like every minute that passes creates a bigger monster inside of him.
    Please pray for him.
  • djs123
    djs123 Member Posts: 102
    djs123 said:

    Tomorrow brain mri
    Day by day....tomorrow is the MRI on the brain. I'm' praying it does not show up there. I'm afraid I will lose my mind if we keep getting more bad news. Firststhe prostate, then the lungs, then the bone.....not the brain please!
    Biopsy of the bone has not yet been scheduled. Want to get these tests done so my husband can start getting chemo. I feel like every minute that passes creates a bigger monster inside of him.
    Please pray for him.

    Brain MRI Clean
    I feel like we've won lotto. The MRI of his head show no mets in his head. To me that's a big miracle and a good sign.
    Praying every minute.
    Monday biopsy of the bone in his hip to see if the cancer is coming from his lungs or prostate. If it's the prostate, that's better so that's what we're hoping for.
  • katenorwood
    katenorwood Member Posts: 1,912
    djs123 said:

    Brain MRI Clean
    I feel like we've won lotto. The MRI of his head show no mets in his head. To me that's a big miracle and a good sign.
    Praying every minute.
    Monday biopsy of the bone in his hip to see if the cancer is coming from his lungs or prostate. If it's the prostate, that's better so that's what we're hoping for.

    prayers added !
    djs123,
    You two have been through so much ! Please know my thoughts and prayers are with you ! Katie
  • djs123
    djs123 Member Posts: 102

    prayers added !
    djs123,
    You two have been through so much ! Please know my thoughts and prayers are with you ! Katie

    thanks for the prayers
    Katie
    Thank you so much.
  • ToBeGolden
    ToBeGolden Member Posts: 695
    Thanks For The Info
    I have two weeks to wait until I find out whether the stuff in my lungs is cancer. But I want to thank all of you who posted on this thread for your information and your messages of hope. I need a lot of both: information and hope. Rick.
  • dennycee
    dennycee Member Posts: 857 Member

    Thanks For The Info
    I have two weeks to wait until I find out whether the stuff in my lungs is cancer. But I want to thank all of you who posted on this thread for your information and your messages of hope. I need a lot of both: information and hope. Rick.

    Two weeks ?
    Two weeks is a long time. They should have a prelim report in 3-5 days even if they are poorly differentiated. Perhaps they are waiting for genetic mutation tests before bringing you in?
  • winter woman
    winter woman Member Posts: 14
    your husband
    I am so sorry to hear this news about your husband. It sounds to mem that he is in the first stages of grief. I am sure this will get better with your encouragement and love.

    and it will be hard for you taking the brunt of anger or whatever he feels..make sure you take care of YOU! Caretakers get the most stress in my opinion and i am the one with Cancer! My fiance' is strong, but i try to remember he is human with his own feelings of hopelessness and fear. so try to do something nice for yourself every day..no this is not selfish..just putting on a new nailpolish...or making a nice hot cup of tea and sitting alone for awhile.
    Good luck to you my dear. and i will be praying for you all.
  • just_kims
    just_kims Member Posts: 2
    patric said:

    Hope
    I only know that conventional treatments don't offer much help. Still, it is necessary to exhaust every alternative. I suggest to look at cancertutor online. They have many alternative suggestions, and they're honest, at least that's my sense of it. With stage 4, you have no time to waste.
    Other than that, nutrition is critical, and organic foods, greens an absolute...also cut out all sugar and reduce carbs, as it is the nourishment cancer needs to grow.
    There are hundreds of alternative/integrative methods to potentiate chemotherapy, reduce side effects and slow the progress of cancer growth. Some are noted to force apoptosis (cancer cell death).
    A great book on Amazon is, Natural Strategies for Cancer Patients.
    The goal is to stop the spread and contain the cancer until you can put a program in place. It doesn't cost thousands. as I have learned by spending many thousands. I am more than willing to share my knowledge.
    My son, with stage 4 lung cancer is stable and feeling good, one year out. He was told, maybe 2 or 3 months.
    It's taken that year to develop a plan, but it's working...so says his oncologist.
    He is one, and I know of others who are working on staying healthy.
    I suggest looking at google scholar for MCP (modified citrus pectin) It has a lot to offer, mostly that it stops metastasis, clears the body of heavy metals and contributes to bowel regularity. Also check out LDN, low dose naltrexone, there is a web site. It takes awhile to work, but looks good. There is no one approach. It is a combination of many, including chemo. The options are mind boggling and overwhelming, believe me, I've been there. I'd start with a good diet as above and MCP, whey protein, super greens, it can and must taste good.
    I'm available to help. My email is pafogg@gmail.com

    You give me hope
    Hello...my husband was diagnosed on 10/10/12 with lung cancer (non-small cell) with mets in liver, adrenals, & bones. I am still in shock & when I am not taking care of him I am online researching. I thought cancer was a death sentence until I found this site & even more so when I saw ur post. Can you please let me know more about the regemin for your son. I have just ordered the book you suggested on amazon. I feel that cancer is just a toxicity in the body that c,an be regressed. Please give me any info you have. We have started chemo & it is making him weak & he has lost a lot of weight. Anything you can enlighten me on would be appreciated.