newly diagnosed and recovering from double mastectomy 36 years old
so I just filled out my profile and it felt good to actually write for awhile about all this. It has been very scary and I'm so very angry, irritated, annoyed, you name it! I have two beautiful children, daughter is 9 son is 7 and my wonderful hubby. My best friend. We have a 2000 acre wheat farm and have a wonderful life. I am very fortunate for what I have. I never thought something like this would happen. Isn't that what everyone says? I have worked in the medical field and am comfortable with most things until it actually affects me or someone I love. So back to the BC. I felt the bump in May thought it was a cyst, got an ultrasound and biopsy and whammo! Stopped breathing for a few days, couldn't really function and then my husband said " you need to get up and get moving". So I did. Oh by the way before my augmentation my doc required mammos and mine came back fine! Go,figure! So anyway, saw my doctor and got a plan. I am estrogen, progesterone + and her2n - The bump was 1.0. My options were lumpectomy w/ rad or mastectomy. I decided to go for a double mastectomy. If I left any tissue behind I would constantly be worried i would get it again. I mean why wouldn't I think that? I got it in the first place! So I am home recovering from double with reconstruction. I had the surgery on aug. 9. I have expanders in so I can still have some boobies when this is all over. I have no feeling in my chest and my armpits and that is the most annoying I think. My nodes were clear by the way. Yahoo! They were able to keep my areola but took my nipples. So I won't have scaring in my cleavage area which I was okay with I guess in the scheme of things. I have a fantastic surgeon whom I completely trust. I still have one drain tube in but hope to get it out Monday. This is all so surreal and I can't believe I am even talking about it but it is what it is and I'm gonna kick ****. I unconditionally respect anyone who' has dealt with this in one form or another. Isn't it amazing when you get diagnosed and you start talking to people you realize just how big this is! I am still waiting for my BRCA and oncodx test results and I am nervous but am trying to stay positive. I have read BRCA are usually triple neg?? Is this primarilly true? I'm praying for a low oncodx. Out of all of this chemo scares me the most.
Comments
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Hi Farmgirl,
I hate that you
Hi Farmgirl,
I hate that you have the need for us, but still want to say welcome. I have found the people here compassionate, caring, and supportive. They have kept me sane while I've been on this roller coaster.
My bilateral was Jan 2011. No reconstruction for me though. I'm not a good candidate...it's a long story so I won't go into it here. I do hope your recovery is swift and sure.
You've got a lot to process and deal with right now, and I hope you find coming here helpful. Because we really do care.
Hugs,
Linda0 -
Hi Farmgirl. Welcome, but so sorry you have to be hereGabe N Abby Mom said:Hi Farmgirl,
I hate that you
Hi Farmgirl,
I hate that you have the need for us, but still want to say welcome. I have found the people here compassionate, caring, and supportive. They have kept me sane while I've been on this roller coaster.
My bilateral was Jan 2011. No reconstruction for me though. I'm not a good candidate...it's a long story so I won't go into it here. I do hope your recovery is swift and sure.
You've got a lot to process and deal with right now, and I hope you find coming here helpful. Because we really do care.
Hugs,
Linda
The one thing I really loved reading in your post was that you were "going to kick ****"!!! That's the spirit. We're all in this fight--to varying degrees and for a varying length of time. I am currently recovering from a left sided mastectomy done on 8/10. Still sore, stiff and tight. This was from a recurrence of my original back in Dec. '09 when I had a lumpectomy, chemo and radiation. I also found out in January I have bone mets to spine/pelvis--which are doing quite well with treatment.
So, long story short, I'm still here, still fighting, still with a great quality of life. Like Linda said, it's been a roller coaster and I want off. But, I'm also here to say, you sound like a real tough chick. You've got a beautiful life with two beautiful kids and a loving husband. Definitely things to fight for.
So glad you found us. You're right--the writing is therapeutic and we have a wealth of compassionate, loving and informed people on this site. I get help from here daily.
Stay with us, keep us posted and continue to heal and move forward.
Hugs, Renee0 -
Thank you for the kindGabe N Abby Mom said:Hi Farmgirl,
I hate that you
Hi Farmgirl,
I hate that you have the need for us, but still want to say welcome. I have found the people here compassionate, caring, and supportive. They have kept me sane while I've been on this roller coaster.
My bilateral was Jan 2011. No reconstruction for me though. I'm not a good candidate...it's a long story so I won't go into it here. I do hope your recovery is swift and sure.
You've got a lot to process and deal with right now, and I hope you find coming here helpful. Because we really do care.
Hugs,
Linda
Thank you for the kind words. It already makes me feel better to visit with others about this all. I will continue to write and I send my very best wishes your way.0 -
Renee, I appreciate you writing to me and your thoughts. It really does feel better to have a "circle" of people per say to visit with whom understand. Thank you.missrenee said:Hi Farmgirl. Welcome, but so sorry you have to be here
The one thing I really loved reading in your post was that you were "going to kick ****"!!! That's the spirit. We're all in this fight--to varying degrees and for a varying length of time. I am currently recovering from a left sided mastectomy done on 8/10. Still sore, stiff and tight. This was from a recurrence of my original back in Dec. '09 when I had a lumpectomy, chemo and radiation. I also found out in January I have bone mets to spine/pelvis--which are doing quite well with treatment.
So, long story short, I'm still here, still fighting, still with a great quality of life. Like Linda said, it's been a roller coaster and I want off. But, I'm also here to say, you sound like a real tough chick. You've got a beautiful life with two beautiful kids and a loving husband. Definitely things to fight for.
So glad you found us. You're right--the writing is therapeutic and we have a wealth of compassionate, loving and informed people on this site. I get help from here daily.
Stay with us, keep us posted and continue to heal and move forward.
Hugs, Renee0 -
I know what you mean!Farmgirl2151 said:Thank you for the kind
Thank you for the kind words. It already makes me feel better to visit with others about this all. I will continue to write and I send my very best wishes your way.
Welcome to this site. I just wanted to comment on the numbness in your chest and underarms. I had a double mastectomy last August. The numbness in the same areas drove me crazy, especially in the back of my arms. It was much more pronounced on the left side because I had 9 nodes removed there and only one on the right side. I can tell you that one year later, I have the feeling back in my right arm and armpit, 90% back in the left arm and armpit and some feeling back in my chest. As your chest is healing, you may feel little lightning bolts of pain. I was told that is the nerves healing which signals you are getting feeling back. It is a long process of healing both physically and emotionally, but I can honestly say that finally after surgery, chemo and radiation, I finally feel like I am getting back to my old self. I hope your recovery goes well! Penny0 -
Healing from double mastectomy.Penny67 said:I know what you mean!
Welcome to this site. I just wanted to comment on the numbness in your chest and underarms. I had a double mastectomy last August. The numbness in the same areas drove me crazy, especially in the back of my arms. It was much more pronounced on the left side because I had 9 nodes removed there and only one on the right side. I can tell you that one year later, I have the feeling back in my right arm and armpit, 90% back in the left arm and armpit and some feeling back in my chest. As your chest is healing, you may feel little lightning bolts of pain. I was told that is the nerves healing which signals you are getting feeling back. It is a long process of healing both physically and emotionally, but I can honestly say that finally after surgery, chemo and radiation, I finally feel like I am getting back to my old self. I hope your recovery goes well! Penny
Thank you Penny. You give me something to look forward to. I do get little bolts of pain and I think to myself " go little nerve go"! I am only three weeks out and probably am expecting too much but I am naturally impatient! . I just want to feel as normal as I can. I know that there are many woman out there worse off then me and I need to be grateful for the condition I am in. I appreciate you responding to me and I wish you luck in your journey. It just seems so surreal. I remember everyday that this actually is happening.0 -
Welcome & it has been surreal for me tooFarmgirl2151 said:Healing from double mastectomy.
Thank you Penny. You give me something to look forward to. I do get little bolts of pain and I think to myself " go little nerve go"! I am only three weeks out and probably am expecting too much but I am naturally impatient! . I just want to feel as normal as I can. I know that there are many woman out there worse off then me and I need to be grateful for the condition I am in. I appreciate you responding to me and I wish you luck in your journey. It just seems so surreal. I remember everyday that this actually is happening.
Welcome
Physical therapy did help me a lot to gain range of motion. I got 90% after 6 months which is considered very good. Recently we watched movie Inception
again that what I feel sometime dream within a dream within a dream.
I was diagnosed 4 years ago @46, undergone very aggressive treatment and got progression to my bones two month ago. You can read more on my profile and expression page
Hugs
New Flower0 -
Like Penny
I had the numbness under my arm, almost to my elbow. I didn't realize it until mentioned that Hey! it's almost not numb anymore! I had a first a lumpectomy then a unilateral mastectomy 6/2011, so it's been just over a year. I still get the nerve ending jolts occasionally. It may be because I had nipple reconstruction in Dec 2011 and the lumpectomy and mastectomy were done through my nipple, so 3 surgeries in the same spot. My breast skin is still somewhat numb. I almost want it to stay that way until I get my tattoo! I was absolutely scared of chemo too. My onco told me I was going to have it plus radiation. She didn't tell me about the oncotype dx test. I fortunately found out about it and had a low score and didn't need it after all. I went through unnecessary stress for a couple of months. I hope yours will be low also. But if you have chemo, a lot of the ladies here can tell you how doable it is. I'm new to this board also and wish i had found it last year when going through treatment. Good luck to you!
Deb0
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