The Sundance Channel: “A Trip Back in Time to A Forgotten Place”

PILOT EPISODE

Welcome to the debut of The Sundance Channel! The pilot episode kicks off a brand new series today that I hope will be entertaining and thought provoking. There will be about six-episodes in this first series. In today's episode, we get the news of a family member's passing and the subsequent trip back to a land and a time that I thought was forgotten - back to a place that I thought I had buried in my mind.
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Well, the first call came in from Kim’s sister. Their grandfather, who was living in an assisted living center, was having ‘difficulty breathing’. That had a familiar ring to it, having just gone through all of this with my own dad these past many months.

Her sister reported that hospice had been called in – “for anxiety medication.”

Uh, huh.

Her sister is not familiar with the medical world at all and is completely dialed out and in denial about anything having to do with health or death. I knew something was amiss.

The second call came in some time later, reporting that things were stabilized. I relaxed a little bit and was hoping that this was just another situation that would resolve itself with time.

Kim had broken her ankle and I just knew that this kind of trip would be very hard on her. Additionally, there was some paperwork snafu, so she had not been paid and I had to absorb her expenses to make the payroll for the monthly bills and I didn’t want to take on any more water.

I was thinking, “Thank goodness he is okay for now.” I knew that we would have to send Kim home if he passed, and I was scrambling in my mind for a way to make that happen, should it come to that.

Then, the third call came in – her grandfather had taken a sudden turn for the worse and had passed away.

So now, the scramble was on to try and pack Kim up, find a ticket and purchase it, and get her on her way home to be with her family as expeditiously as possible. On such short notice, I knew the plane fare would be exorbitant, but I hoped that the Bereavement Fare would lighten the load a little bit.

Kim and I bandied back and forth about me coming with her. I had six projects I was working on at work and my boss had just left for vacation out of the country, so the timing was unfortunate and the pressure was on.

We had a high profile company project going on – the kind that can get you fired. I was having issues trying to get my end to work, but it wasn’t through my own incompetence. Software and computers are always a problem in this world and make my life miserable, more often than not.

So, I told Kim that I needed to stay here and attend to business and keep my job. She initially agreed, though she was disappointed and I could tell. I explained that we really didn’t have the cash flow for two of us – but, I was obligated to get her back home somehow.

She told me that my nephew and new niece and their little girl wanted to see me and the rest of the family wanted to see me after all of these years and all of those cancers. I immediately dismissed that notion and told her I wasn’t going to go with her for all of the logistical reasons I had already given her, but we would get the ball rolling for her.

She kind of broke down after that.

So, I had to stop and re-evaluate my position. After much consideration and thought, I reasoned that even though it was inconvenient for my job, that I had bereavement leave afforded to me. And because, the funeral would be out of town over 100 miles away (Texas to PA, lol), I would receive four days to handle the matter.

I had missed her grandmother’s funeral last year and Kim had to as well – because of my cancer fight. I was too ill and Kim was care giving for me, so I couldn’t go and she elected to stay with me. I always hated that, because she was a fine woman and was always nice to me.

It had been 12-years since I last stepped foot up in that part of the woods - alot of water has passed under that bridge during that span. I've had to use alot of my vacation time this year taking time off to handle my dad’s business affairs, so I knew I would not have any time left to even think about going up there normally.

And I reasoned that a lot of the folks I might not normally see during a regular visit would gather in one spot at a time like this, which would mean that I could touch base with more people.

It made sense. After all, the old running joke on my dad’s side of the family was that “Funerals Were the Family Reunions.”

I began wavering back and forth on what to do….what was the right thing to do, versus what was really the right thing to do?

All I could think about was how I was going to logistically make this happen. In the end, I had no choice but to spend the house money to purchase two tickets, so that we both could go and worry about it when we got back.

And since we don’t have any neighbors or family to help drive us to the airport, that necessitated me hiring a ride to and from the airport, prepaid of course. And of course, Harley had to be boarded for the same reasons, there is just no help. And of course, we all know about the bag fees tacked on each way etc. etc.

Kim did not get any real break for the bereavement fare. I thought that was disappointing, but since it was such short notice, we got dinged. I’ve never paid that high a price for a ticket in my life, much less two.

All I could see was dollar signs at this point (as men often do) and I was starting to fume and found myself trying to stop the bleeding. But, it was too late…..the damage was done and I’d try and pick the pieces back up when we came home.

So, I had to work a full day and then rush home and be ready for the ride to the airport. This was going to be a long day. You have to get to the airport now about two-hours early for all of that TSA rigmarole.

Our flight was delayed, which moved things back to an 8:30pm departure to Pittsburgh. Of course, we lose an hour going up Northeast….and then there would be an additional two hours on top of that for the drive from Pittsburgh to where they lived.

All in all, it was going to be about a 20-hour + kind of day and the visitation was to begin the following afternoon. I was already pretty tired and dreading all of it. We haven’t even caught our breath since my dad passed and then Kim breaks her ankle and all of that – and now we’re whisking away out of town to pay respects – all in such quick order.

Bang, bang, bang…

It got me to thinking about “The Illusion of Control” that I’ve been harping on recently. And how this year, it has been exactly that….and illusion or a nightmarish mirage.

We haven’t been in control of anything in quite some time…we’ve been dictated to and our lives have been thrown around like a tiny boat on the ocean of life - caught in the maelstrom of a bad storm of hurricane proportions, that converged on our lives with a sudden fury, and from whose grip I’ve seemingly been unable to elude.

So, we arrive in Pittsburgh close to midnight – the place is a ghost town at this hour as all the shops are closed and the hallways empty. As we traverse the terminal, some of the sights began to have familiar look to them as my memory dials some of those images back to the forefront of my mind from days gone by.

Down at baggage claim, there are two familiar faces – my nephew and soon to be niece, waiting for us. A few quick pleasantries and a hug and we grab the bags and begin making our way out of the airport.

I was at first thinking I would just rest for the two-hour drive back to where they live. It was part of my pre-conceived notion of how I thought things would go down, starting with this part of the trip.

As we left the airport, making our way to the main highways we would need to take, I glanced over to my left and saw the silhouette of a building whispering to me from the past - it had an air of familiarity about it. So, I asked my nephew “Is this where we went to eat that one time?”

He said yes. It was a Domino’s Pizza back in those days. Me, Kim, and the kids (then), they were about 11 years old had stopped to get something to take with us. I remember it so much feeling like a family to me – us and the kids – and me trying to provide for us. I remember Domino’s kicking in a 2-litre Pepsi, because I was from Texas and we looked like a family, lol!

That moment in time still frozen but quickly thawed and relived in the few seconds I saw it before we drove out of sight on into the night. The building and that memory are still sitting in the same place – physically and in my memories - only the name has changed.

As the miles wound past us, the scenery was stark under the cover of night – all the visible landmarks shrouded by darkness as my imagination was left to try and fill in the missing pieces from a memory that had long ago closeted these memories and the meanings they held for me during that period of my life – then and now.

We talked and laughed the whole way home. Instead of napping – I tried living for a change. I found that Love, Camaraderie and Togetherness, shredded the miles quickly and before we knew what had happened, the 2-hour drive was over and we were pulling up in front of Clark’s Donuts about 2:30 am.

Now, Clark’s Donuts is a time capsule - a throwback in time to a way of life that had been going on in part of the country for many generations for Pennsylvania folks.

It used to be located in the heart of the city, but had closed many years ago – but, had recently reopened in another location. The new location, must like the previous location is old and not particularly big on pretense. What you see is what you get.

And what you get, is some good old-fashioned donuts made the old-school way. When we walked in, the place was hazy in a fog of fried batter, so thick you had to wipe your eyes to see – you could literally taste the atmosphere There is not a lot of state-of-the-art ventilation inside those walls – nor OSHA regulations either, I’m sure – certainly not at that hour of the morning.

But, as the old saying goes - make donuts – and they will come.

The line began queuing up behind us shortly after we arrived – the hometown folks know when the batter rolls out of the grease:)

It’s funny - here we are in small town America at 2:30 in the morning and there is a line for donuts – you gotta’ love it.

We got back to their place and sat down for a hot one before going to bed….we ended up talking another two hours – it was close to 5am before we gave it up…I could have stayed up and talked all morning.

The day was finally over and we were exhausted but contented. New life and interaction and companionship were part of my life again on this day and while I knew we had much family business to attend to – I was now so hopeful of the other time we would get to share with one another, when the business end of the trip had been concluded.

But, for now, it was time to make my up the stairs to a new environment and lay this old body down so I could begin a new day – just a few short hours away.

I had no real idea, nor any real expectations for what I would think, feel and see over the course of the next seven-days. As always, The Unknown remains one of life’s biggest mysteries – and it can harbor our greatest fears – but, sometimes it can also yield our greatest rewards.

-Craig


Next Episode: “The Visitation.”

We’ll re-visit old haunts and once again try and put names to the faces of the past…