Back in the hospital

We are back in the hospital---Salem Hospital this time, not OHSU. I'm breaking in a new set of nurses and doctors haha.

David had an MRI on Thursday. He's not doing very good..... It takes everything I have to get him in and out of a car and to and from an appointment. I have a wheelchair but the problem is the car. Anyway, I told the MRI staff that they would need a lift team to get him in and out of the MRI. No prob they say....they see people like David all the time. After about an hour, they came and got me out of the lobby. David had a fall. He had told them he needed to use the bathroom and they got him out of the wheelchair and stood him up in front of the urinal... Then they went out and shut the door! They told me that they were respecting his privacy. It was all male nurses so it wasn't like David was embarrassed going to the bathroom in front of a cute little blond his age. I was as nice as possible but I asked them why they thought he could be left alone after they saw what it took to get him in the MRI machine. They just said they thought he'd be ok. I still can't believe that they left him alone.

My husband was furious when I told him and wanted me to file a complaint but I just didn't want to go there. I'd rather just be mad for a while, I guess.

So on Friday I noticed a red spot on David's eyebrow and I thought it was from the fall. On Saturday Christy came over and looked at it and she saw blisters in his eyebrow hairs. She thought it looked like shingles so she googled it and found out that chemo patients are more suspectible to shingles. I called OHSU and they told me to take him to ER. So sure enough, it's shingles. David was in terrible agonizing pain from it. But because we caught it fast, it didn't get into his actual eye. They said in the eye is considered a medical emergency. But it's bad enough just being around the eye. The whole side of his face swelled up and his eye is swollen shut and nasty stuff is oozing out. It's been really, really bad.

If that wasn't enough, Davis also had a lump between his....male part and his butt. It was really painful too. They aspirated it in ER---agony--- and drained out the nastiest, most foulest crap.....and said that he has an abscess. So they enlarged the hole and put in a drain. The next day it was leaking more pus so they really opened it up and now he has a wound that will require special care when we go home. I'll have to pack it like I did when he had that huge abscess and hole back in January when he had cellulitis.

On iop of all this, his oncology team strongly recommended that I talk to David about a DNR/DNI order, and suggested ( again) that I should call hospice. I cried so much yesterday that my eyes were almost all the way swollen shut. My husband and family came to the hospital... It was so hard and so awful.

So.....David wasn't really awake enough yesterday to have the DNR talk so my husband told me to just pick a good time. We decided not to make some huge emotional thing out of it, and to just say that we already knew what he wanted--- we just wanted to make sure we were on the same page as David. So after everyone went home, David was more alert and awake, and I talked to him. To my surprise, he said that he did NOT want a DNR or a DNI order. He wants everything done to keep him alive. Not what I thought he'd say and not what I would want. But it's his life and his choice and I'm not a monster and will not try to talk him out of any decisions that he makes. it's a good thing that I asked because that is not what I thought he'd want. So I won't be calling hospice either.

After that talk, David perked up and asked for a turkey sandwich. He ate every bite of it. Used the urinal and watched some TV with me. I climbed right up on his hospital bed and held him in my arms and we watched The Office and dozed a little. A very sweet special time.

This am the infectious disease dr said that he's cleared David to go home tomorrrow. Yesterday we thought we'd still be here on Saturday. My daughter is getting married on Saturday. So this is really great news. We still need to be released by the hospitality doctor though, and David's heart rate is still high so we may not get to leave tomorrow--- but regardless, David is much improved and things are definitely looking up. Still a rollercoasterof a ride...

While I was in the hospital with David, my sister and some other family and friends went to my house and painted my kitchen and shampooed my carpets, washed my windows and blinds, and cleaned and scrubbed my whole house. We have a lot of family flying in for the wedding, and my sister knew how stressed I was about people coming to see David and having my house so messy. Isn't that a wonderful thing that they did for me?

So I know that David is still going downhill but I feel like we have won a little reprieve here. I am living one day at a time, and this day is a good one.

So....that's where we are at this moment in time. I hope all of you are having great moments and great days and are doing well and winning your battles. I think about you guys here on CSN all the time, and I'm praying for you.

Love and blessings, always,
Cindy in Salem, Oregon