What a ride this has been.

In January, 2008 I started noticing blood with bowel movements. I had a number of tests, including a barium enema, CT scans and the poop analysis, and everything came back negative. The bleeding continued and I had a colonoscopy in April, 2009, without anesthesia. Since I was wide awake I got to see the two little polyps that were discovered and removed and I was feeling very positive, since the doctor wasn't finding anything bad, and the procedure was just about over, but then he made the turn into the ascending colon and I got to see the huge, ugly, evil, bleeding tumor that looked like something from hell. I asked the doctor if it was something bad, knowing that it was. The doctor didn't have the best bedside manner, because as we were looking at the tumor on the monitor he was admonishing me for not having had regular colonoscopies instead of "messing around with those other tests." I asked if it was cancer and he said "yes" and said that now we had to do CT scans to see if and where the cancer had spread. He gave the impression that it must have spread, because it was so large. The pathology report later confirmed that it was cancer, and would have to be removed. Yet, my major concern is that I once had a bad experience with anesthesia and I wanted to know if the operation could be done with a local, with me awake. I never do anything easy. The tumor was removed in May, 2009 along with 26 nodes. The tumor was the size of an orange, and the surgeon said it was one of the largest he had ever seen. When I was staged at 2A the surgeon indicated that I must be at least a stage 3, because he had seen for himself that the tumor had punched through the wall. In any case, I was reluctant to do chemo and delayed for three months, before I finally gave in to the urging of my wife and oncologist. Again, I never do anything easy. I felt wonderful the first day of chemo treatment, but then it was downhill from there. The regiment was supposed to be for 6-months, with 6-weeks on chemo and 2-weeks off, but I had so many toxic reactions to the chemo, and so many interruptions, I was only two-thirds through the chemo treatment one year later when the doctor stopped it, after a perforation happened in my super irritated colon and I was rushed to emergency. So, then it was a CT scan every three months and now I'm having them every six months. I'm scheduled for one in three weeks and my CEA level, as per yesterday is 1.9, which is has been since my resection. So, this is a grim disease, this f**king cancer, but all we can do is take the next indicated step in front of us. I use to share here a lot, when I was going through all the struggle, and haven't been sharing that much, since things have smoothed out and I have moved on with my life, but I do like to come back now and then and to let others know that I'm still on the plant and things are going well after three years and I wish all of you the very best in your battle. All we can do is fight the good fight and take it a day at a time.