Unbeliveable Stress...No way out

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  • debrajo
    debrajo Member Posts: 1,095 Member
    #22
    pakb56 said:

    Getting through it
    Funny thing, I don't even question how I get through but I do. I am happy, I feel well and that is the best I can hope for now. Of course anything can change at any minute and I pray for the strength to get myself through whatever comes next. We all have so much to go through...I don't consider it better or worse, just different. I do not walk this road alone, I walk along side so many others following those that have come before us and in front of those that will follow behind.

    Husbands can be such puds sometimes. I have had a few interesting moments with mine the last couple of weeks. Like just being home from the hospital and him telling me to clear the kitchen table and bathroom counter of clutter. Don't like it...do it yourself. I think the stress may have been getting to him and he does not handle it as well. The whole family stress on my end is his family. His dad passed in December, his 90 year ole aunt who has lived with them her whole life tried to committ suicide by overdosing on sleeping pills, his mom is in hospital and his sister is a control freak that complains about doing everything (which their isn't much to do) but never asks for help and wants to dictate what everybody should do and discusses nothing with him.

    Well, blah, blah....this is supposed to be about you. Glad your son is going to college and husband quieted down! Gotta love them in spite of themselves sometimes!

    Take care,
    Pat

    Good grief Pat! You have
    Good grief Pat! You have more drama than a daytime soap opera! Believe your sister-in-law wants to not only be a control freak, but a martyr as well! I know about the "clear the table thing"! When I got home from the dr.s with the dx. my husband asked me how it went, I said,"I have cancer", him: can they get rid of it? Me, "I don't know...its bad" him: hum....What's for supper?"!! Husbands...gotta love them...NOT! Let me know how you are going on day to day. I always admire someone who can refraim from commiting murder! best, debrajo
  • pakb56
    pakb56 Member Posts: 141
    #23
    debrajo said:

    Good grief Pat! You have
    Good grief Pat! You have more drama than a daytime soap opera! Believe your sister-in-law wants to not only be a control freak, but a martyr as well! I know about the "clear the table thing"! When I got home from the dr.s with the dx. my husband asked me how it went, I said,"I have cancer", him: can they get rid of it? Me, "I don't know...its bad" him: hum....What's for supper?"!! Husbands...gotta love them...NOT! Let me know how you are going on day to day. I always admire someone who can refraim from commiting murder! best, debrajo

    Funny
    Another bright spot to end today.....Your post made me laugh. This road we are on is such a journey and we all have our "stories from the road". There is strength in numbers and I am glad I found them here!
  • debrajo
    debrajo Member Posts: 1,095 Member
    #24
    pakb56 said:

    Funny
    Another bright spot to end today.....Your post made me laugh. This road we are on is such a journey and we all have our "stories from the road". There is strength in numbers and I am glad I found them here!

    If I can make someone laugh,
    If I can make someone laugh, it's a good day! I always did take "the road less traveled"...just didn't know it would be the "road to HELL"! I don't know where I would be without these boards. Who else knows but someone who has been through the same thing! Since there is strength in numbers, in mind and spirit let's give all husbands/partners...a mental wedgie!!!!!! Best, debrajo
  • pakb56
    pakb56 Member Posts: 141
    #25
    debrajo said:

    If I can make someone laugh,
    If I can make someone laugh, it's a good day! I always did take "the road less traveled"...just didn't know it would be the "road to HELL"! I don't know where I would be without these boards. Who else knows but someone who has been through the same thing! Since there is strength in numbers, in mind and spirit let's give all husbands/partners...a mental wedgie!!!!!! Best, debrajo

    Mental wedgie
    Or, better yet a kick in the Arse!
  • debrajo
    debrajo Member Posts: 1,095 Member
    #26
    pakb56 said:

    Mental wedgie
    Or, better yet a kick in the Arse!

    .....Oh Yeah,Buddy!!!

    .....Oh Yeah,Buddy!!!
  • nempark
    nempark Member Posts: 681
    #27
    debrajo said:

    Good grief Pat! You have
    Good grief Pat! You have more drama than a daytime soap opera! Believe your sister-in-law wants to not only be a control freak, but a martyr as well! I know about the "clear the table thing"! When I got home from the dr.s with the dx. my husband asked me how it went, I said,"I have cancer", him: can they get rid of it? Me, "I don't know...its bad" him: hum....What's for supper?"!! Husbands...gotta love them...NOT! Let me know how you are going on day to day. I always admire someone who can refraim from commiting murder! best, debrajo

    Did anyone seen the show 'Chicago"?
    Well...... the husband was not working and when the working wife came home he was sitting on the couch drinking a beer, watching tv and popping his gum. She asked him to stop and off course, he didn't. While she was cooking he started to pop the gum even more and it so happened she was carving a chicken LOL. When the cops came she told them she didn't know what happened it was a terrible accident --- he just walked into the knife----------TEN TIMES. The theme song was "he had it coming". Thank God as you said it is really admirable for those who can refrain from commiting murder. I love you all June. Hope this makes you laugh. By the way Debrajo Did you make dinner that night?
  • cleo
    cleo Member Posts: 144
    #28
    nempark said:

    Did anyone seen the show 'Chicago"?
    Well...... the husband was not working and when the working wife came home he was sitting on the couch drinking a beer, watching tv and popping his gum. She asked him to stop and off course, he didn't. While she was cooking he started to pop the gum even more and it so happened she was carving a chicken LOL. When the cops came she told them she didn't know what happened it was a terrible accident --- he just walked into the knife----------TEN TIMES. The theme song was "he had it coming". Thank God as you said it is really admirable for those who can refrain from commiting murder. I love you all June. Hope this makes you laugh. By the way Debrajo Did you make dinner that night?

    Oh Bliss!!!
    And here I was thinking that I was the only person with thoughts of a husband and a piece of 4 x 2 round the ears!!! I think that there are men who cannot cope with any form of illness in others. Mine has Parkinsons and never stops talking about how he feels but has nil interest in why I am toddling off to the Dr. I don't think that I have become selfish but just self aware and self preservation is paramount. I am fortunate to still be here and intend to stay. You made me smile. But...sometimes as they say...love is not enough.
    Here's to us!!!
  • debrajo
    debrajo Member Posts: 1,095 Member
    #29
    nempark said:

    Did anyone seen the show 'Chicago"?
    Well...... the husband was not working and when the working wife came home he was sitting on the couch drinking a beer, watching tv and popping his gum. She asked him to stop and off course, he didn't. While she was cooking he started to pop the gum even more and it so happened she was carving a chicken LOL. When the cops came she told them she didn't know what happened it was a terrible accident --- he just walked into the knife----------TEN TIMES. The theme song was "he had it coming". Thank God as you said it is really admirable for those who can refrain from commiting murder. I love you all June. Hope this makes you laugh. By the way Debrajo Did you make dinner that night?

    Dang!!! Should have seen
    Dang!!! Should have seen Chicago!!! I had visions more on the line of "Hannible" the pig scene?!! I love the 10-times and he did walk right smack-dab into it, I swear officer! That guy does sound a lot like the...arragance of my husband. Scene, Jan. cold, wet, dark, him out of work, four little kids, a broke-down washer, no dryer. I pick up a seasonal job delivering phone books door-to-door on foot for 8 cents a book. He is home ALL day, kids in school, watching t.v. when I come in kids running to me for something to eat. He rears back and says, So, what are you cooking, the kids are starving! I have to admit, my mind went to the dark side for a looooong time! Oh, and did I mention I was two months pregnant? Thank you Lord for staying my hand! @nempark:I am mentaly hard-wired to have a meal on the table when the man(any man) comes home from work. It's just the way I was raised...not to question or want better. To my shame, I fixed supper and buried all that anger deep inside, with a half a package of double stuffed Oreo's to weight it down! No wonder I am an expert at green jello and ethelene-glycole! Best, debrajo
    1
  • pakb56
    pakb56 Member Posts: 141
    #30
    debrajo said:

    Dang!!! Should have seen
    Dang!!! Should have seen Chicago!!! I had visions more on the line of "Hannible" the pig scene?!! I love the 10-times and he did walk right smack-dab into it, I swear officer! That guy does sound a lot like the...arragance of my husband. Scene, Jan. cold, wet, dark, him out of work, four little kids, a broke-down washer, no dryer. I pick up a seasonal job delivering phone books door-to-door on foot for 8 cents a book. He is home ALL day, kids in school, watching t.v. when I come in kids running to me for something to eat. He rears back and says, So, what are you cooking, the kids are starving! I have to admit, my mind went to the dark side for a looooong time! Oh, and did I mention I was two months pregnant? Thank you Lord for staying my hand! @nempark:I am mentaly hard-wired to have a meal on the table when the man(any man) comes home from work. It's just the way I was raised...not to question or want better. To my shame, I fixed supper and buried all that anger deep inside, with a half a package of double stuffed Oreo's to weight it down! No wonder I am an expert at green jello and ethelene-glycole! Best, debrajo
    1

    The stronger
    Women are for sure. If I have a headache (migraines which he never head) his is worse. If I have a cold, his is worse. Good grief gentlemen...suck it up and deal with it. I have to say though, DH not being sensitive and a touchy feely sort of guy has come through for me in a few ways that surprised me (with patience he usually doesn't have) but still continues to say and do some things that make me want to pop him!

    Great day and weekend to all of you!

    Pat
  • daisy366
    daisy366 Member Posts: 1,458 Member
    #31
    pakb56 said:

    The stronger
    Women are for sure. If I have a headache (migraines which he never head) his is worse. If I have a cold, his is worse. Good grief gentlemen...suck it up and deal with it. I have to say though, DH not being sensitive and a touchy feely sort of guy has come through for me in a few ways that surprised me (with patience he usually doesn't have) but still continues to say and do some things that make me want to pop him!

    Great day and weekend to all of you!

    Pat

    I can SOOOO relate
    Good conversation, ladies.

    It is helpful to see that I am not alone in my situation. What the heck is it with the male gender?

    I wonder what would happen if we all "lost it" at the same time? I wonder how many men would remain standing. And the Chicago analogy is very apt.

    Here's to you ladies!!
  • debrajo
    debrajo Member Posts: 1,095 Member
    #32
    daisy366 said:

    I can SOOOO relate
    Good conversation, ladies.

    It is helpful to see that I am not alone in my situation. What the heck is it with the male gender?

    I wonder what would happen if we all "lost it" at the same time? I wonder how many men would remain standing. And the Chicago analogy is very apt.

    Here's to you ladies!!

    I think after a certain
    I think after a certain age/marriage time ALL men and women should live in seperate houses! If you can really stand the guy,you could live next-door...as for me, I would rather lve across the state! Oh, did I mention I'm from Texas?!!!debrajo
  • daisy366
    daisy366 Member Posts: 1,458 Member
    #33
    debrajo said:

    I think after a certain
    I think after a certain age/marriage time ALL men and women should live in seperate houses! If you can really stand the guy,you could live next-door...as for me, I would rather lve across the state! Oh, did I mention I'm from Texas?!!!debrajo

    or....
    We could designate one state for them to live in. I nominate Texas - diverse and big and it would be a big ego booster for them.
  • debrajo
    debrajo Member Posts: 1,095 Member
    #34
    daisy366 said:

    or....
    We could designate one state for them to live in. I nominate Texas - diverse and big and it would be a big ego booster for them.

    Not Texas!!!!Please!!!!! I'm
    Not Texas!!!!Please!!!!! I'm sixth generation Texas and too old to move! I had in mind something more on the line of Devil's Island...no escape from there(unless you're Paul Newman!)
  • snowbird_11
    snowbird_11 Member Posts: 160
    #35
    daisy366 said:

    or....
    We could designate one state for them to live in. I nominate Texas - diverse and big and it would be a big ego booster for them.

    Reminds me of that old folk song that begins...

    Rueben, Rueben, I've been thinking
    What a grand world this would be
    If the men were all transported
    Far beyond the northern sea.
  • debrajo
    debrajo Member Posts: 1,095 Member
    #36
    snowbird_11 said:

    Reminds me of that old folk song that begins...

    Rueben, Rueben, I've been thinking
    What a grand world this would be
    If the men were all transported
    Far beyond the northern sea.

    THAT will be my new "HAPPY
    THAT will be my new "HAPPY pLACE" all the medical people talk about! A vision of some place FAR beyond the northern sea!!!
  • pakb56
    pakb56 Member Posts: 141
    #37
    debrajo said:

    THAT will be my new "HAPPY
    THAT will be my new "HAPPY pLACE" all the medical people talk about! A vision of some place FAR beyond the northern sea!!!

    Checking in
    Just wanted to check in on you and see how your are doing my friend. Hope all is going well and you are in a good place!

    Hugs to you,

    Pat
  • debrajo
    debrajo Member Posts: 1,095 Member
    #38
    pakb56 said:

    Checking in
    Just wanted to check in on you and see how your are doing my friend. Hope all is going well and you are in a good place!

    Hugs to you,

    Pat

    Thanks Pat and all, I guess
    Thanks Pat and all, I guess it is the way it will be. I have been so busy taking care of Mama and getting her and step-dad on Medicaid and he in an Alzheimer's nursing home that his bad behavior just hasn;t phased me much lately. Too tired to care...never seen sooo much paperwork! My poor chemo-brain just can function. If I can hold out til the end of Aug when son goes to university I can take his attitude. Til then...the pot boils! Thank you, my dear, for remembering me! Say a prayer I don't commit murder! Best, debrajo

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