42 YR OLD OVARIAN CANCER SURVIVOR ASKS WHAT NOW?

mahreeya
mahreeya Member Posts: 2
edited March 2014 in Ovarian Cancer #1
I was diagnosed at age 39 with Stage IIIA. Been in remission since 7/00, and my CA125 has been 10-14 ever since, so my prognosis looks good. BUT, I keep saying to myself: "What now?" I have a boring job, and life seems meaningless. I am married, and my husband and I are on different work schedules. We have no children (despite 10 years of infertility treatment, but THAT's another support group topic!)
Does anybody else have that "what now?" feeling? and how do you deal with it?

Comments

  • ingrid
    ingrid Member Posts: 9
    #2
    HI-I was diagnosd Ovarian Cancer in 1999 and my prognosis looks good too.
    I have made the same experience, as you do, and, from time to time, have the same questions. After my chemo treatment I tried to go back to my "normal" life. But I could'nt manage.
    After one year I decided to change my life dramatically. I changed my job - my attitude .....
    Life is not meaningless. You did struggle to survive, you decided to survive - so nothing is meaningless at all!
    In my opinion, after treatment the biggest problem is the following: during the treatment everybody is caring and daring for one. After the treatment everything and everybody goes back to "normal". Bur please do not give up - try to find your way again. Life is beautiful and you will find your goals again - I am sure!
    If ever you want to discuss, please write to ingrid_vettiger@hotmail.com. I will be happy to exchange with you.
    All the best - take care
    Ingrid
  • mustang55
    mustang55 Member Posts: 4
    #3
    YES! I know what you are talking about! I am struggling with the same feelings. It's like....what do I do next? Am I for sure cured? Or just in remission? What plns do I make? How much time is there left?
    It's hard to shake off the fears, for me anyway.

    SIGH.....
  • crtsang
    crtsang Member Posts: 102
    #4
    A friend of mine, a breast cancer survivor, recommended a book called Dancing in Limbo. You might check it out.
  • flourgirl
    flourgirl Member Posts: 5
    #5
    hi, iam a cancer survivor of 2 ,almost 3 years, and i a full of life...i do have a side effect from the chemo..of which i took every 3 weeks for 18 weeks...my life time side effect is numbness in my feet to the point that i must always keep something on my feet, even in bed. i can not stand in one place for more than 2 hous or they start to burn and hurt.. doc tells me to try jel insoles and capazan..a pepper cream...but so far no luck....just adjust my work life and learn to deal with it...after all iam still living! i do look at life in a completely different way and iam much more emotional about everything...sometimes too much. oh did i mention iam 51. i hope i can find lots of freinds thro this,lifetime freinds...i kept a journal when i went thro my chemo, it has helped to console freinds whom have gone thro chemo to know somewhat what to expect...actually haven gone thro my cancer has openned up many avenues for me....the hard way. keep the faith and think positive, flourgirl
  • jakiel
    jakiel Member Posts: 1
    #6
    My mother in law is currently going through chemo for satge III ovairan cancer. She is very depressed and would like to talk to someone going through the same thing. There is a local support group but they are moslty breast cancer patients. Is there anyone that you could suggest?
    Her hands are swollen from the chemo so that chat room would be hard for her to type. Is there any phone support available. Please any advice greatly appreciated!
  • Cindyirv
    Cindyirv Member Posts: 1
    #7
    jakiel said:

    My mother in law is currently going through chemo for satge III ovairan cancer. She is very depressed and would like to talk to someone going through the same thing. There is a local support group but they are moslty breast cancer patients. Is there anyone that you could suggest?
    Her hands are swollen from the chemo so that chat room would be hard for her to type. Is there any phone support available. Please any advice greatly appreciated!

    Hi, I was diagnosed with Ovarian Cancer stage 3a in 1991, when I was 42, I had chemo, surgery, radiation and I made my 10 years in 2001 (Yeah!!) plus two ,and rejoice daily for my second chance. I would like to know if any of you have trouble with neuropathy in your hands or feet? I took cytoxin and cisplatin and then massive doses of radiation (I have had my lifetime quota) and the only real side affects I have are the neuropathy and low immunity. I know what you mean by wondering if I am making good enough use of this extra time. I feel as though I will have to account for each day, and I try not to waste a single moment. Would love to find survivors, I am grieved to say, I have not found many, who have survived 10 years plus. Maybe we can change that. Please write to me at:
    Cindyirv@Highstream.net. Thanks and Fight like hades ladies, get smart and tough.
  • AngieM
    AngieM Member Posts: 4
    #8
    I am 36 and was diagnosed with stage3 ovarian in Sept. 2002. I had surgery, and just finished chemo. Now, after all the hoopla, I am starting to feel depressed. When everyone thought I was going to die, everyone came out of the woodwork to help. Now that I am going to live, everyone has gone on with their lives. Meanwhile, I am wondering what it is all about. I like my job, but do I really want to go back? What use to bring me joy doesn't interest me. I don't even want to think about housework! I love my husband and kids, but I feel so lonely. I guess I was so focused on getting better that I didn't let the "what ifs" get to me in the beginning, but they are there now. Even though the dr. is happy with my CA125 at 13, I can't help but feel it is too high and the cancer is just teasing me, ready to strike again! I just try to keep all the thoughts away and just go it one day at a time.
  • Amanda767
    Amanda767 Member Posts: 6
    #9
    flourgirl said:

    hi, iam a cancer survivor of 2 ,almost 3 years, and i a full of life...i do have a side effect from the chemo..of which i took every 3 weeks for 18 weeks...my life time side effect is numbness in my feet to the point that i must always keep something on my feet, even in bed. i can not stand in one place for more than 2 hous or they start to burn and hurt.. doc tells me to try jel insoles and capazan..a pepper cream...but so far no luck....just adjust my work life and learn to deal with it...after all iam still living! i do look at life in a completely different way and iam much more emotional about everything...sometimes too much. oh did i mention iam 51. i hope i can find lots of freinds thro this,lifetime freinds...i kept a journal when i went thro my chemo, it has helped to console freinds whom have gone thro chemo to know somewhat what to expect...actually haven gone thro my cancer has openned up many avenues for me....the hard way. keep the faith and think positive, flourgirl

    Neuropathy Feelings in Feet
    Hi! I just started chemo and am having problems with burning and pain in my feet. My doctor has prescribed a vitamin called Metanx to see if it will help. He also started me on Symbalta and Lyrica. I'm hoping this will help me deal with my next chemo. Maybe you could ask your doctor about these options. Hope you feel better. Amanda
  • kikz
    kikz Member Posts: 1,345 Member
    #10
    AngieM said:

    I am 36 and was diagnosed with stage3 ovarian in Sept. 2002. I had surgery, and just finished chemo. Now, after all the hoopla, I am starting to feel depressed. When everyone thought I was going to die, everyone came out of the woodwork to help. Now that I am going to live, everyone has gone on with their lives. Meanwhile, I am wondering what it is all about. I like my job, but do I really want to go back? What use to bring me joy doesn't interest me. I don't even want to think about housework! I love my husband and kids, but I feel so lonely. I guess I was so focused on getting better that I didn't let the "what ifs" get to me in the beginning, but they are there now. Even though the dr. is happy with my CA125 at 13, I can't help but feel it is too high and the cancer is just teasing me, ready to strike again! I just try to keep all the thoughts away and just go it one day at a time.

    Wow
    first of all let me say a lot of you ladies coming forth with your long-term survival is encouraging. I have been NED for about 19 months but my CA 125 went up to 23 when last tested in April. I will have another one in June. That will determine what happens next for me.

    I have been trying to suck the life out of every moment since I finished treatment. Not to say my life is particularly exciting. I am a homebody but I am so appreciative of everything. I know how much I want to live.

    It's true after ov/ca diagnosis our lives can never be the same. It is up to each one of us to somehow make peace with it.

    I am 64 (62 when diagnosed) so I'm sure it is different for you. I don't have any sage advice to offer except to try to live for today. I try really hard not to look too far forward. I admit I have pictured my funeral a couple of times but I don't dwell on it for long.

    The fact of the cancer is always on my mind but I have been able to distance myself from it emotionally. I am sure I will be very emotional as the next CA 125 comes up. I had hope that I would be one of the lucky ones who beats this disease...and who knows I may.

    I am happy for all of you who have had so much time since your diagnosis. Enjoy it!

    Karen
  • carolenk
    carolenk Member Posts: 907 Member
    #11
    Amanda767 said:

    Neuropathy Feelings in Feet
    Hi! I just started chemo and am having problems with burning and pain in my feet. My doctor has prescribed a vitamin called Metanx to see if it will help. He also started me on Symbalta and Lyrica. I'm hoping this will help me deal with my next chemo. Maybe you could ask your doctor about these options. Hope you feel better. Amanda

    This is an old post
    Amanda: welcome to the discussion board. I'm sure your suggestions for neuropathy will help some of the current members. As this new thread was started about 10 years ago, I don't know if any of this women are still active discussion board members today.

    You can click on someone's screen name to see if they have provided personal details of their story--and you can see when their most recent posting has been.

    Again, welcome to our group.

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