Please not again!!
Thanks ladies for letting me vent. I think even my husband is getting sick of me constantly worrying that every ache and pain is somehow cancer, but unless you've been thru it you just can't get it.
Comments
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Frightened and Worried
Oh Penny - I know how you feel. I have just had a 3rd bout of breast cancer but the 1st was 27 years ago and the second was 17 years ago. I am assuming this is your first. It may be the only one you ever have. I walked around terrified for the first 1-2 years after my first bout. One day I realized I only had one day - the one I was in. It just wasn't helping to worry about the future. A dear yoga teacher taught me how to breathe through my fears, let it all go, and stay in the day. Sometimes, while waiting for results of a test that may be 5 minutes at a time, but generally I can stay in the day. It takes practice but you can do it and it will take a great weight off you.
Hugs,
Pam0 -
pam is right, my first dxPam5 said:Frightened and Worried
Oh Penny - I know how you feel. I have just had a 3rd bout of breast cancer but the 1st was 27 years ago and the second was 17 years ago. I am assuming this is your first. It may be the only one you ever have. I walked around terrified for the first 1-2 years after my first bout. One day I realized I only had one day - the one I was in. It just wasn't helping to worry about the future. A dear yoga teacher taught me how to breathe through my fears, let it all go, and stay in the day. Sometimes, while waiting for results of a test that may be 5 minutes at a time, but generally I can stay in the day. It takes practice but you can do it and it will take a great weight off you.
Hugs,
Pam
pam is right, my first dx was 18 years ago then a year later then the other breast in 2009. You actually learn to live with it, but it takes time, there are times of panic and you go with it and move on. you will gain more confidence as you have these "scares" that turn out to be ok, and realze its not always cancer. However how could you not think it? The awful has happened but that doesnt mean everything will be. hugs. you did the right thing gettin it addressed and helping to take care of you ....mentally and physically. Hugs from another Penny0 -
I am so sorry that this evencarkris said:pam is right, my first dx
pam is right, my first dx was 18 years ago then a year later then the other breast in 2009. You actually learn to live with it, but it takes time, there are times of panic and you go with it and move on. you will gain more confidence as you have these "scares" that turn out to be ok, and realze its not always cancer. However how could you not think it? The awful has happened but that doesnt mean everything will be. hugs. you did the right thing gettin it addressed and helping to take care of you ....mentally and physically. Hugs from another Penny
I am so sorry that this even happened to you. I think we all go thru the scare of every ache and pain being the cancer back. I believe, unfortunately, that it is part of ever being diagnosed with this crappy disease.
I pray that with each day, month and year that we all can breathe a bit more and not worry so much, but, I feel it will always be with us.
Wishing you good luck and praying for you,
Leeza0 -
I feel the same way
Hi,
Every three months when I go to the doctor I worry. When I get a CT scan I worry. When I feel constant pain I worry. I have had cancer twice now and am living with mets to the bone. In between I can usually forget for a little while, but it always comes back. You are not alone. I have to say I try not to share it anymore and just keep it to myself and talk to my therapist about it. Maybe therapy would help? Feel free to vent anytime.
Terry0 -
Cancer hits
straight to the core of our humanity. It can be deadly, but often is not so due to current treatments. Anyone who faced a threat to thier life would be wise to try and avoid the experience again. If you escaped a bear attack I would think you would avoid the woods where you saw the bear. You might still go into the woods but probably not that same spot and you'd be careful when you went watching for tell tale signs of bear. Now that we have had cancer, we try to avoid the same circumstances that got us there. However, living life is what got us cancer. How do you avoid that? You can't but you end up being more vigilant about your health.0 -
You're not alone Penny.azdixie said:please not again
Just wanted you to know that I am keeping you in my prayers.
You're not alone Penny. Someone referred to this as "Canxiety" or something like that. Every ache and pain will immediately take you there. I liken it to "Post traumatic War Syndrome", you know when someone goes into battle, they come back and are traumatized. Well, we went through war on Cancer. And we don't want to do it again. I'm not sure how long that anxiety lasts.
I'm praying for you, that all is well.
Hugs,
Sylvia0 -
I still hate tests and isea60 said:You're not alone Penny.
You're not alone Penny. Someone referred to this as "Canxiety" or something like that. Every ache and pain will immediately take you there. I liken it to "Post traumatic War Syndrome", you know when someone goes into battle, they come back and are traumatized. Well, we went through war on Cancer. And we don't want to do it again. I'm not sure how long that anxiety lasts.
I'm praying for you, that all is well.
Hugs,
Sylvia
I still hate tests and i know my next one will require general anesthesia I swear. However there are times when I think I should be worried and that is no longer my first reaction. Although I have moved on to my heart and last night was worrying I was having a heart attack because my arm hurt haha. of course it is a fear rooted in fact having a family history,. been put into chemopause, anti estrogens, and radiation all over my chest. Oh gosh this jalopy is so beat up...... but we just keep going and surviving0 -
Good
for you for knowing that you werent going to sit back and let them tell you that it could be this or could be that. I am so glad that you got the copies and knew where to take them to get the answers that you need to know. And the secretary is awesome for reassuring you and making sure that she wont let you wait out the long weekend to find something out. I think all of us here can totally relate when you say that you have periods of joy and positivity and then wham something else happens. Im so sorry about the loss you have already suffered with the loss of your husband to cancer. We here will never get sick of your worries that you have. I know that i go through the same thing. You can vent anytime here. Ive been on the board for almost three years and even though its been a while since i have been on, i always enjoy trying to encourage another sister. It is my was of healing myself and i get such a fullfillment and blessing doing it. Take care and God bless
Laura0 -
Updatelolad said:Good
for you for knowing that you werent going to sit back and let them tell you that it could be this or could be that. I am so glad that you got the copies and knew where to take them to get the answers that you need to know. And the secretary is awesome for reassuring you and making sure that she wont let you wait out the long weekend to find something out. I think all of us here can totally relate when you say that you have periods of joy and positivity and then wham something else happens. Im so sorry about the loss you have already suffered with the loss of your husband to cancer. We here will never get sick of your worries that you have. I know that i go through the same thing. You can vent anytime here. Ive been on the board for almost three years and even though its been a while since i have been on, i always enjoy trying to encourage another sister. It is my was of healing myself and i get such a fullfillment and blessing doing it. Take care and God bless
Laura
Thank you ladies for your kind words and support. Fortunately it was not related to cancer but an old shoulder injury that left micro calcifications under my shoulder. My radiation oncologist is so amazing. When he got into work Friday he took the films right up to radiology and had one of his "old" radiologists look at the x-ray since the newbies are used to everything being on computer and they both agreed that it was in no way related to cancer. That was a relief to go into Easter vacation not having something else to worry about!0 -
Great NewsPenny67 said:Update
Thank you ladies for your kind words and support. Fortunately it was not related to cancer but an old shoulder injury that left micro calcifications under my shoulder. My radiation oncologist is so amazing. When he got into work Friday he took the films right up to radiology and had one of his "old" radiologists look at the x-ray since the newbies are used to everything being on computer and they both agreed that it was in no way related to cancer. That was a relief to go into Easter vacation not having something else to worry about!
Better safe then sorry !!!! Now relax and enjoy ! Hugs
Kathy0 -
Excellent news Penny! SoPenny67 said:Update
Thank you ladies for your kind words and support. Fortunately it was not related to cancer but an old shoulder injury that left micro calcifications under my shoulder. My radiation oncologist is so amazing. When he got into work Friday he took the films right up to radiology and had one of his "old" radiologists look at the x-ray since the newbies are used to everything being on computer and they both agreed that it was in no way related to cancer. That was a relief to go into Easter vacation not having something else to worry about!
Excellent news Penny! So relieved as I know you are too!0 -
Good news for surePenny67 said:Update
Thank you ladies for your kind words and support. Fortunately it was not related to cancer but an old shoulder injury that left micro calcifications under my shoulder. My radiation oncologist is so amazing. When he got into work Friday he took the films right up to radiology and had one of his "old" radiologists look at the x-ray since the newbies are used to everything being on computer and they both agreed that it was in no way related to cancer. That was a relief to go into Easter vacation not having something else to worry about!
Good news for sure Penny!
Hugs, Debby0
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