Off arimidex, exchange surgery, overwhelmed.

serenity92
serenity92 Member Posts: 84
in Breast Cancer #1
Sorry I just need to get some of the stinking thinking out of my brain. A little history, I was diagnosed with leukemia in 2005, I have been in ongoing treatment and on oral chemo for seven years. Two kinds of skin cancer in between. Than I was diagnosed with breast cancer last july. I had a double mastectomy in august. I september they excised all the incisions as i dont heal so well. In october they took my ovaries as I evidently am one of the oddballs who cannot metabolize tamoxofin. I went on arimidex in November. I deal with ongoing bone pain issues as my leukemia chemo targets my bone marrow. After six weeks my oncologist pulled me off the arimidex because my bone pain and hot flashes were instantly so severe. I have been off the arimidex for a month and all I keep thinking is that 'I am growing a new cancer, the mets is coming'. I dont see my oncologist until March ninth. So I called him yesterday and said it really scares me not to be on anything for the breast cancer. He said "we need to get your side effects under control, and there needs to be quality of life" I told him quality of life doesnt mean much if I am dead of mets.
Than my exchange surgery {thank goodness} is scheduled for the 21st of this month. I saw the surgeon tuesday and he told me that he has decided that he is going to admit me to the hospital {after six mohths of being told it is a simple same day surgery} as my surgery is going to be more extensive than the 'average' person. Honestly my chest looks like it was mauled by a dog with the rock hard 'lobs' in the middle. I just want to be average, just plain Jayne. I am so exhausted of being the brave one, the one with all the odd cancers, the one with the wierd side effects to everything, I want to not be in pain, I want to see my little girl grow up, I want to be AVERAGE. I want to not be at some hospital every week...Thanks for letting me brain spew....Jayne

Comments

  • roseann4
    roseann4 Member Posts: 992 Member
    #2
    Jayne, You are very brave!
    This board is wonderful but I hope your have a support group of people around you. I joined a wonderful support group which has helped me get through a lot. I wish could give you more than a cyber hug.

    Roseann
  • Double Whammy
    Double Whammy Member Posts: 2,832 Member
    #3
    roseann4 said:

    Jayne, You are very brave!
    This board is wonderful but I hope your have a support group of people around you. I joined a wonderful support group which has helped me get through a lot. I wish could give you more than a cyber hug.

    Roseann

    You've been through so much!
    Wow Jayne, you've had a whole lot to deal with. And you must be very young given the picture posted and your comment that you want to see your daughter grow up. My heart goes out to you and wish I could make it all better.

    The surgery and recovery will pass, you will be in good hands in the hospital. That will be one worry off your plate, but it will take a while.

    About the Arimidex, there are many women who can't tolerate it and elect not to take anything and do fine. I understand the fear of not doing something. This cancer thing just plain sucks. Sometimes one of the other aromatase inhibitors (like Femera) will not have the same side effects for an individual.

    I'll send some well wishes, hugs, positive vibes, and prayers your way. Please keep us posed as to your progress.

    Suzanne
  • camul
    camul Member Posts: 2,537
    #4
    Jayne
    Tamoxifen was toxic to my system also, my onco didn't even want to go with Arimidex because of all the side effects from the tamoxifen, so I am on Evista. So far no side effects that I can tell. I take it at night. But he didn't start that for about 3 months after the tamoxifen. He says that your body can only take so much. I wasn't happy at first but at least this way if there would have been any side effects, I would have known it was from the Evista, not the Tamoxifen.

    Now I am off chemo for 4-6 weeks to give my body a rest. I was not happy at first, but it is also a relief as I am so exhausted that I couldn't tell if it is from the treatments or from the cancer. Cancer sucks, but sometimes we have to take breaks to give our body a chance to heal so we can keep doing it!

    Good luck and prayers to you on your exchange surgery and your ongoing treatments.

    Carol
  • SIROD
    SIROD Member Posts: 2,194 Member
    #5
    A Real Survivor!
    You are a survivor, so no doubt you will be able to overcome this latest bump. You are really overdue to have some sunshine in your life.

    Wishing you regular days with no excitement except joy for the rest of your life.

    Doris
  • serenity92
    serenity92 Member Posts: 84
    #6
    SIROD said:

    A Real Survivor!
    You are a survivor, so no doubt you will be able to overcome this latest bump. You are really overdue to have some sunshine in your life.

    Wishing you regular days with no excitement except joy for the rest of your life.

    Doris

    .
    Thank you for your responses. I do go to a wonderful womens cancer support group at the local hospital. For five years I was the only non breast cancer participant. It was sometimes frustrating listening over and over to all the talk about implants, expanders, lumpectomies etc. as my issues were generally different and most people could not relate. I just felt like I kinda didnt belong alot of the time. Lo and behold I end up with breast cancer, my support group was almost as devistated as i was. I gotta say though I was definately WWWAAYYY more informed than your average person about what to expect. I had been hearing alot of .scary stuff for several years, lol. But they sure stepped up and were there for me through it all. They are an amazing group of women. I just wish they met more than once a month. My oncologist thought I would probably have issues with the arimidex because of my current issues from my leukemia drugs.. boy was he right. Unfortunetly I am severly restricted in what we can try because my tasigna [chemo] does not play nice with almost everything. Thanks again for listening. Jayne
    b

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