Anxiety-8 weeks post chemo-STILL NO SURGERY DATE

jss2011
jss2011 Member Posts: 132
in Esophageal Cancer #1
I swear, I have to keep reminding myself to " just breath". My stress level is through the roof! I can only guess what my hubby is feeling/thinking right now, all I know is he is so scared and has a short fuse.

We met with the surgeon yesterday and got all the nitty gritty details of the laproscopic esophagectomy (THE but with 5 small incisions in belly and 1 at the neck). He covered the list of tubes, wires etc and of course all the complications that "could" happen.
I am one that likes having all the info so I know what to expect. NOT in this case! I sat there trying to be strong, choking back the tears. Hubby just felt like puking.

Next was pre-op work up. This whole thing took about 5 hrs but felt like the longest day ever. How can you be so tired and still not able to sleep!!

From what I've read here, ideal time for surgery is about 6 weeks post chemo, if I recall correctly right now? Doc wanted hubby to quit smoking so I guess that is part of the delay, plus the holidays, but it is starting to worry me! But surgery could be any day now, just waiting for phone to ring. Seems more like we are waiting on a transplant. They did call monday for surgery tuesday, hmm, day before pre-op work up LOL, so really, any day now.

That's Canada for you, things move really really slow then so fast your head spins. I just wish I could fast forward a month or two, bet I'm not alone on that front.
I don't have to work today, maybe I will try to nap and escape the mess in my head!

Julie
wife of Nicholas
dx mid jun T2N2M0

Comments

  • Proactive Daughter
    Proactive Daughter Member Posts: 55
    #2
    Hi Julie, it's a rough road...
    Hi Julie, I can understand your anxiety. My dad was quite the opposite. Everything moved so quick, almost too quick. One minute he was diagnosed and two weeks later he was in surgery. Getting your husband in the operating room is bittersweet. I know we just wanted the cancer removed immediately, but then we knew that the surgery came with risks.

    Stay strong, it's a rough road, but we are here for you. We understand your anxiety, the sick feeling you get in your stomach, your heartache for your husband. It's okay to feel that way, but the power of positive thinking goes a long way.

    Just know we are always hear to lend an ear,

    Jennifer
  • paul61
    paul61 Member Posts: 1,392 Member
    #3
    Proactive Daughter said:

    Hi Julie, it's a rough road...
    Hi Julie, I can understand your anxiety. My dad was quite the opposite. Everything moved so quick, almost too quick. One minute he was diagnosed and two weeks later he was in surgery. Getting your husband in the operating room is bittersweet. I know we just wanted the cancer removed immediately, but then we knew that the surgery came with risks.

    Stay strong, it's a rough road, but we are here for you. We understand your anxiety, the sick feeling you get in your stomach, your heartache for your husband. It's okay to feel that way, but the power of positive thinking goes a long way.

    Just know we are always hear to lend an ear,

    Jennifer

    It certainly is scary
    Julie,

    I understand where you are coming from. I remember as I left the surgeon's office after she described my operation to me, I told my wife "that made me sick to my stomach".

    I have to admit I was anxious up until the night before I had my surgery. Since I live a long way from the hospital and had to do a "purge" prior to surgery, I checked into the hospital the day prior to my surgery. As I lay there that night trying to go to sleep, I thought, "well this is it". I became very calm and actually fell asleep until they came to get me for surgery in the morning.

    It is certainly natural to be nervous but with this diagnosis, surgery is a blessing.

    Hope things move quickly for both of you

    Best Regards,

    Paul Adams
    McCormick, South Carolina

    DX 10/22/2009 T2N1M0 Stage IIB
    12/03/2009 Ivor Lewis
    2/8 through 6/14/2010 Adjuvant Chemo Cisplatin, Epirubicin, 5 FU
    Two year survivor

    Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance!
  • sandy1943
    sandy1943 Member Posts: 824
    #4
    The waiting is awful. After
    The waiting is awful. After several tests, my appontment with the surgeon finally arrived. We had the consultation and was told there would be more testing before a decision was made on surgery. I couldn't beleive it. Why didn't he order the test before I came? Testing finally over and was told chemo first. I just wanted the awful cancer out of me, but agreed chemo was needed first. From Nov. diagnois until May surgery, seemed like the longest time, but everything did work out.
    Good Luck and praying surgery will be soon,
    Sandra
  • TerryV
    TerryV Member Posts: 887
    #5
    Thought on the timing of quitting cigarettes
    Hello Julie :)

    My husband, Nick, age 48, T3N1M0 - is also a smoker. Doc wanted him to reduce his smoking before surgery but NOT to quit just prior to surgery. If my memory is correct, the reasoning is that to quit smoking causes extra lung "distress" and newly quit smokers cough a bit. Extra coughing or lung issues aren't good immediately following surgery that already poses as a pneumonia risk. That plus I'm sure that hard coughing would hurt like the dickens after an esophagectomy surgery.

    I hope your husband's surgery is soon and that all goes well for you. I wish you peace and calm while you wait in the surgery waiting area. Best of luck to you both!

    Love & Hugs,

    Terry
  • PMT
    PMT Member Posts: 15
    #6
    TerryV said:

    Thought on the timing of quitting cigarettes
    Hello Julie :)

    My husband, Nick, age 48, T3N1M0 - is also a smoker. Doc wanted him to reduce his smoking before surgery but NOT to quit just prior to surgery. If my memory is correct, the reasoning is that to quit smoking causes extra lung "distress" and newly quit smokers cough a bit. Extra coughing or lung issues aren't good immediately following surgery that already poses as a pneumonia risk. That plus I'm sure that hard coughing would hurt like the dickens after an esophagectomy surgery.

    I hope your husband's surgery is soon and that all goes well for you. I wish you peace and calm while you wait in the surgery waiting area. Best of luck to you both!

    Love & Hugs,

    Terry

    Hi Julie
    Hi Julie, I know the emotions and feelings you are having, it feels like a roller coaster, one moment hopeful the next scared. Hope the surgery occurs soon and it goes well. I wish you calm and strength. Keep us informed.
    Paula
  • PMT
    PMT Member Posts: 15
    #7
    TerryV said:

    Thought on the timing of quitting cigarettes
    Hello Julie :)

    My husband, Nick, age 48, T3N1M0 - is also a smoker. Doc wanted him to reduce his smoking before surgery but NOT to quit just prior to surgery. If my memory is correct, the reasoning is that to quit smoking causes extra lung "distress" and newly quit smokers cough a bit. Extra coughing or lung issues aren't good immediately following surgery that already poses as a pneumonia risk. That plus I'm sure that hard coughing would hurt like the dickens after an esophagectomy surgery.

    I hope your husband's surgery is soon and that all goes well for you. I wish you peace and calm while you wait in the surgery waiting area. Best of luck to you both!

    Love & Hugs,

    Terry

    Hi Julie
    Hi Julie, I know the emotions and feelings you are having, it feels like a roller coaster, one moment hopeful the next scared. Hope the surgery occurs soon and it goes well. I wish you calm and strength. Keep us informed.
    Paula
  • PMT
    PMT Member Posts: 15
    #8
    TerryV said:

    Thought on the timing of quitting cigarettes
    Hello Julie :)

    My husband, Nick, age 48, T3N1M0 - is also a smoker. Doc wanted him to reduce his smoking before surgery but NOT to quit just prior to surgery. If my memory is correct, the reasoning is that to quit smoking causes extra lung "distress" and newly quit smokers cough a bit. Extra coughing or lung issues aren't good immediately following surgery that already poses as a pneumonia risk. That plus I'm sure that hard coughing would hurt like the dickens after an esophagectomy surgery.

    I hope your husband's surgery is soon and that all goes well for you. I wish you peace and calm while you wait in the surgery waiting area. Best of luck to you both!

    Love & Hugs,

    Terry

    Hi Julie
    Hi Julie, I know the emotions and feelings you are having, it feels like a roller coaster, one moment hopeful the next scared. Hope the surgery occurs soon and it goes well. I wish you calm and strength. Keep us informed.
    Paula
  • jss2011
    jss2011 Member Posts: 132
    #9
    PMT said:

    Hi Julie
    Hi Julie, I know the emotions and feelings you are having, it feels like a roller coaster, one moment hopeful the next scared. Hope the surgery occurs soon and it goes well. I wish you calm and strength. Keep us informed.
    Paula

    Staying busy
    Thanks everyone. Paul, I do think hubby is feeling a bit better now, he has been talking to our dog LOL. And since it is the weekend chances of going in for the next few days are pretty much nil. Sandra, wow, you had a long trek of it, thanks for sharing, it does help.
    Terry, really?? Well I guess it's a good thing that he is still smoking the odd one (or two). That's the first thing he did after we left the hospital!
    Paula, my calm comes from staying busy, I am going back to my seasonal job Monday, they know it might only be a few days till I'm off for a while but home with hubby is not good for either of us right now.
    Thank You all for your positive thoughts and prayers.

    Julie

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