Just a question

kikz
kikz Member Posts: 1,345 Member
in Ovarian Cancer #1
I hope you ladies won't think I am too silly but I wanted to ask for your thoughts about something. Who better to ask? I have been wearing my teal "cancer sucks" bracelet as well as a yellow Livestrong bracelet (a friend gave me) since shortly after I was diagnosed in March of 2010. I have been NED since fall of 2010 and I really don't want to wear them anymore. I don't even want to wear any other teal-related bracelet. I want to move on and wear a regular bracelet on my wrist or none at all. So what is my problem you ask? I feel a little superstitious about taking them off. I know, I know, my brain says "oh brother" but some other part of me is afraid. There are several other family members and friends who are still wearing one for me. I thought of picking a date and having us all take them off together in some ceremonious way and then....what do we do with them? I'm sorry that I am taking your time with something so frivolous but I would love to hear what you think.

Karen

Comments

  • karen1951
    karen1951 Member Posts: 103
    #2
    i say take that bracelet
    i say take that bracelet off!....i accidentally cut my powerport bracelet off and like you...worried about it for a few days.....then you just put it behind you and get on with your life. it's like looking in the mirror and seeing your short hair and it's a constant reminder of what you are going thru. anything you can do to not be constantly reminded is a good, healthy thing.......have a wonderful holiday....so glad you are doing well....karen
  • Kaleena
    Kaleena Member Posts: 2,088 Member
    #3
    Hi Karen:I know what you
    Hi Karen:

    I know what you mean about feeling a bit "superstitious". I say this because of that very fact I was left with my port in after treatment for five (5) years! I just got it removed and to say the least I was very VERY nervous. I even started to have pains like in my back and feeling "weird". I kept my port in because one of my old doctors who wouldn't remove it said he was superstitutious and since I was fine why do anything with it. The only thing was that month and month after month I had to keep going to the hospital to get my port flushed. A constant reminder, if you know what I mean. It wasn't until my local hospitals refused to flush my port (I changed doctors to a doctor that was in another state) and then I was nervous because I hadn't had my port flushed for five months and was worried about getting a blood clot or something. My new doctor said after my PET scan if it was clear to go ahead and get it out. But because I changed insurance companies, I couldn't use the hospital associated with my doctor so I had to wait and wait. I finally got my port out. But it was six months after my PET and I was due for another scan but new insurance company refused PET so after fighting with them several months I decided to get a CT scan. Needlesstosay, I was nervous because it was my first scan after having my port removed. Good news, report came back clean!

    I say throw a party and have everyone bring their braclets and maybe have everyone drop their braclet in a box but before they do it, tell a special story or something special that happened (A positive) of some sort. Then celebrate!

    My best to you!

    Kathy
  • jbeans888
    jbeans888 Member Posts: 313
    #4
    karen1951 said:

    i say take that bracelet
    i say take that bracelet off!....i accidentally cut my powerport bracelet off and like you...worried about it for a few days.....then you just put it behind you and get on with your life. it's like looking in the mirror and seeing your short hair and it's a constant reminder of what you are going thru. anything you can do to not be constantly reminded is a good, healthy thing.......have a wonderful holiday....so glad you are doing well....karen

    Bond Fire! Burn it. I say if
    Bond Fire! Burn it. I say if you feel that the time has come then the time has come. You can always get another bracelet if need be. But lets hope that is never the case.
  • Cafewoman53
    Cafewoman53 Member Posts: 735 Member
    #5
    jbeans888 said:

    Bond Fire! Burn it. I say if
    Bond Fire! Burn it. I say if you feel that the time has come then the time has come. You can always get another bracelet if need be. But lets hope that is never the case.

    You are a survivor !
    Nothing you wear or don't wear can change that fact ! Love the idea of having a going away party for your bracelets if you can celebrate with a sparkly new bracelet all the better.
    Colleen
  • heatherstage3
    heatherstage3 Member Posts: 7
    #6
    girly
    that is so not stupid. i havent cut loose of my teal stuff. i think the reason i wear it is so when people see me they dont judge me for looking like crap or think that i am a lesbian or something cause of my short hair. no affence to those who chose that sexuality. i would like to get rid of all of it but its so hard. so i understand. i think the party idea is a great idea.
  • kikz
    kikz Member Posts: 1,345 Member
    #7
    heatherstage3 said:

    girly
    that is so not stupid. i havent cut loose of my teal stuff. i think the reason i wear it is so when people see me they dont judge me for looking like crap or think that i am a lesbian or something cause of my short hair. no affence to those who chose that sexuality. i would like to get rid of all of it but its so hard. so i understand. i think the party idea is a great idea.

    Thanks for all the replies.
    I am thinking I will shed my braclets on Christmas day when most of the people who are wearing a bracelet for me will be at my house. I am kind of excited about it now. I really want to move on. I have for the most part but it wasn't until my appointment with my gyn/onc last month that I felt like I need to really put this behind me. I know it will always be on my mind but I don't want to waste anymore time holding back from living. I have always been a homebody even when I was young and now that I am retired I don't go out much. I am giving myself until the end of the year and then I am going to sign up for something. I will also commit myself to some exercise classes in addition to the weekly yoga class.

    I want to have fun, I just have to figure out what that is for me at this stage of my life.

    Karen
  • Mwee
    Mwee Member Posts: 1,338
    #8
    kikz said:

    Thanks for all the replies.
    I am thinking I will shed my braclets on Christmas day when most of the people who are wearing a bracelet for me will be at my house. I am kind of excited about it now. I really want to move on. I have for the most part but it wasn't until my appointment with my gyn/onc last month that I felt like I need to really put this behind me. I know it will always be on my mind but I don't want to waste anymore time holding back from living. I have always been a homebody even when I was young and now that I am retired I don't go out much. I am giving myself until the end of the year and then I am going to sign up for something. I will also commit myself to some exercise classes in addition to the weekly yoga class.

    I want to have fun, I just have to figure out what that is for me at this stage of my life.

    Karen

    You go girl...
    I can't wait to hear what new adventures you choose!
    (((HUGS))) Maria
  • JoWin615
    JoWin615 Member Posts: 150 Member
    #9
    So how did it go?!
    First of all, Happy New Year, everybody!

    I don't post here much but I read a lot, and Karen, I can totally relate to everything you're talking about. Just after I started my chemo in Feb. 2011, my sister found a pretty necklace in a catalog, where some of the proceeds of the necklace sales went to OC research. She sent it to me, and I vowed I would never take it off (except for scans and such) until my treatment was over. On the day of my appointment in June after the final PET scan when my surgeon declared me NED, I stood in front of a mirror and took it off. It was like releasing some part of me, and it was scary. But then I felt better.

    I'm also having the same issues with moving on with my life. OC sure takes the wind out of one's sails (!). I look at everything differently now, and I haven't really figured it all out yet.

    Anyway, I hope you had a good party, or ceremony, or whatever you chose!

    Cheers, Jo

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