I just want to whine.

MellieMc
MellieMc Member Posts: 35
in Breast Cancer #1
I just want to whine and get pissed off. When I'm around people I feel like I have to put on a happy face so I haven't been going around anyone. Mom says, "It looks like your hurt." I say, "Its because it does hurt." It is like I'm supposed to pretend everything is fine. It is a very lonely feeling. I sleep a lot.

I hope it is ok to write this here.

Comments

  • Barb A
    Barb A Member Posts: 123
    #2
    This is the place!
    We all understand where you're coming from. This is the place to express your feelings, whine, get pissed off....

    I always felt like I had to have a happy face so others wouldn't be upset and I got tired of it. I found the people who I could be myself with and express how I really felt and then proceeded to do just that. I tried to be careful not to overdo it with them and when I felt I was, I came to these boards. Sleep all you want, your body needs it right now.

    Take care,
    Barb
  • ladyg
    ladyg Member Posts: 1,577
    #3
    Whine away
    We are here for you anytime you need us. You do not have to put on a "happy face" for us. We have all been there. I did not choose to discuss my cancer with anyone out side of my family and close friends. People that I worked with only knew that I was "sick" but did not know with what.

    Hugs
    Georgia
  • ladyg
    ladyg Member Posts: 1,577
    #4
    Whine away
    oops...double post




    Hugs
    Georgia
  • Heatherbelle
    Heatherbelle Member Posts: 1,226 Member
    #5
    it is perfectly ok to whine
    it is perfectly ok to whine here. I do it all the time :) When i had chemo, it DID hurt alot, and i slept alot, and i cried alot, and i complained and whined and b*tched alot. I found alot of comfort on here during those times. Don't worry about others right now - you just focus on getting YOU through it the most comfortable way that you can.
    *hugs*
    Heather
  • MellieMc
    MellieMc Member Posts: 35
    #6
    Heatherbelle said:

    it is perfectly ok to whine
    it is perfectly ok to whine here. I do it all the time :) When i had chemo, it DID hurt alot, and i slept alot, and i cried alot, and i complained and whined and b*tched alot. I found alot of comfort on here during those times. Don't worry about others right now - you just focus on getting YOU through it the most comfortable way that you can.
    *hugs*
    Heather

    Thanks for the support.
    Thanks so much for your support.
  • MAJW
    MAJW Member Posts: 2,510 Member
    #7
    MellieMc said:

    Thanks for the support.
    Thanks so much for your support.

    Mellie...
    This is the place to whine! I think we've all walked in your shoes...I am dealing with a recurrence and I understand "putting on the happy face"...it gets old....when confronted with people who start with the sympathy " thing" I simply reply " It is what it is and I take each day as it comes".... Actually I feel pretty good and don't think of the what if's.....

    So whine, scream and vent.... We're entitled!
    My best to you, my pink sister
    Hugs, Nancy
  • disneyfan2008
    disneyfan2008 Member Posts: 6,583 Member
    #8
    whining Welcome...
    Denise

    whining Welcome...


    Denise
  • disneyfan2008
    disneyfan2008 Member Posts: 6,583 Member
    #9
    whining Welcome...
    Denise

    whining Welcome...


    Denise
  • tufi000
    tufi000 Member Posts: 745 Member
    #10
    If your vent level hits
    If your vent level hits critical mass and immediate gratification is required, you might try coming to the chat room!!! It's a happy place where we laugh, cry, and...yes...vent.
    Everyone here totally "gets it" and we are all here for you.
  • JuJuBeez
    JuJuBeez Member Posts: 332
    #11
    I'm having one of those days
    I'm having one of those days today. OMG! Usually, when people at work ask how I'm doing, I just smile and say, 'GREAT' or 'fat n sassy as ever'... Today, I have started crying every time. I've spent most of the morning at work in the restroom. I've got to find a way to shake this today. I don't have the energy for it.
  • Lighthouse_7
    Lighthouse_7 Member Posts: 1,566 Member
    #12
    JuJuBeez said:

    I'm having one of those days
    I'm having one of those days today. OMG! Usually, when people at work ask how I'm doing, I just smile and say, 'GREAT' or 'fat n sassy as ever'... Today, I have started crying every time. I've spent most of the morning at work in the restroom. I've got to find a way to shake this today. I don't have the energy for it.

    Whining Safe Zone!!
    Hi,
    You feel free to whine here anytime. Heck the beautiful thing about this site is that you can vent, cry, laugh and just about anything you need to feel better. Other than cursing unless you put some little symbols in. :)
    And feel better you will because we are all here for you and always it seems when you need it the most, someone will say just the right thing that you needed to hear.

    I also find it hard to be around people sometimes because I am usually a very upbeat extrovert kind of person and when I'm not feeling great, people always say, "What's wrong"? Nothing is really wrong but I just feel like being quiet, so sometimes I'd rather keep to myself. I figure it's better for me and for them! LOL

    Hugs,
    Wanda
  • survivorbc09
    survivorbc09 Member Posts: 4,374 Member
    #13
    Lighthouse_7 said:

    Whining Safe Zone!!
    Hi,
    You feel free to whine here anytime. Heck the beautiful thing about this site is that you can vent, cry, laugh and just about anything you need to feel better. Other than cursing unless you put some little symbols in. :)
    And feel better you will because we are all here for you and always it seems when you need it the most, someone will say just the right thing that you needed to hear.

    I also find it hard to be around people sometimes because I am usually a very upbeat extrovert kind of person and when I'm not feeling great, people always say, "What's wrong"? Nothing is really wrong but I just feel like being quiet, so sometimes I'd rather keep to myself. I figure it's better for me and for them! LOL

    Hugs,
    Wanda

    This is a safe zone and I am
    This is a safe zone and I am glad that you posted. Whining, I think, is a requirement of having bc. We deal with so much, yet, it seems some think we should always have that happy face on, and, it isn't possible.

    So, you come here, whine, cry, vent, whatever you want. We "get it"!


    How about a hug?


    Hugs, Jan
  • SIROD
    SIROD Member Posts: 2,194 Member
    #14
    Five Stages of Grief
    Dear Mellie,

    When a person experience a disease such as breast cancer, they to me go through those stages of grief.

    First, you can't believe that you are the 1 out of 8 (Denial).

    Then you make these bargains with God even if you don't believe in one. Don't make me be stage IV, III, II, I. So one Bargains.

    Then there is sadness, the depression of having to deal with so very much.

    Anger is the worst, I always thought. Your mad and your not sure at what to fling all this hostility that has been bottle up until you are able to cope and hopefully return to a new norm.

    Then finally you arrive at acceptance. You had cancer, you beat it and now you do hope it never returns.
    If it does, you have been there and most of us are better at dealing with it the 2nd, 3rd, and etc. time around.

    Perhaps you can speak to your doctor about medication to help you through this rough spot.

    Best wishes,

    Doris
  • Ballerina
    Ballerina Member Posts: 152
    #15
    Whine as much as you want
    Whine as much as you want we truly understand and it's just A.O.K.

    Ballerina
  • madsters1
    madsters1 Member Posts: 120
    #16
    Sniveling allowed
    I'm so glad you said it! ("I just want to whine".) All of the repies helped me so much.

    We DO go through SO much that most people will never have ANY idea of. Even the ones we share with can't really imagine. They see only the outside. Only the sometimes weak smile. None of the bodily scars, none of the indignation of fifty strangers a week touching your breast. None of the heartbreak of the known and the fear of the unknown.
    It's a long process, as we either know or are finding out. It can also be a total shift in your life and who you are. This CAN be good if we allow it, but it's kind of like living upside down for a an extended period of time. Everything looks, feels, and functions differntly. It can become very lonely because NO ONE speaks your language now...except you precious people. The doctors know the terminology but don't really know what we're going through. Each of them treats us in their field, then move us on to someone else. But no one goes all the way through each and every step. No one except my Lord, Jesus Christ. He is the ONLY one who REALLY knows the beginning to the end.
    My humanity so appreciates the commoradity though of you all. Thank you for sharing, for caring and for listening.
  • debi.18
    debi.18 Member Posts: 850 Member
    #17
    madsters1 said:

    Sniveling allowed
    I'm so glad you said it! ("I just want to whine".) All of the repies helped me so much.

    We DO go through SO much that most people will never have ANY idea of. Even the ones we share with can't really imagine. They see only the outside. Only the sometimes weak smile. None of the bodily scars, none of the indignation of fifty strangers a week touching your breast. None of the heartbreak of the known and the fear of the unknown.
    It's a long process, as we either know or are finding out. It can also be a total shift in your life and who you are. This CAN be good if we allow it, but it's kind of like living upside down for a an extended period of time. Everything looks, feels, and functions differntly. It can become very lonely because NO ONE speaks your language now...except you precious people. The doctors know the terminology but don't really know what we're going through. Each of them treats us in their field, then move us on to someone else. But no one goes all the way through each and every step. No one except my Lord, Jesus Christ. He is the ONLY one who REALLY knows the beginning to the end.
    My humanity so appreciates the commoradity though of you all. Thank you for sharing, for caring and for listening.

    Whine Away
    I can't think of a better place to whine! This is the only place where we all just get it. I feel guilty when I whine at home or to friends, like I'm whining too much. I think this is the one place we can all come to and feel comfortable about whining!!

    Hugs and Whines,
    Debi
  • Heatherbelle
    Heatherbelle Member Posts: 1,226 Member
    #18
    MellieMc said:

    Thanks for the support.
    Thanks so much for your support.

    You're welcome :) I hope
    You're welcome :) I hope today has been a better day for you
    *hugs*
    heather
  • MellieMc
    MellieMc Member Posts: 35
    #19
    Heatherbelle said:

    You're welcome :) I hope
    You're welcome :) I hope today has been a better day for you
    *hugs*
    heather

    Thanks all
    I am feeling better now. Thanks all!

    Thanks for accepting and encouraging me.

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