Sobbing - Emotionally Confused - New Meds

emamei
emamei Member Posts: 146
in Breast Cancer #1
I'm still feeling physically run down and trying to stay healthy while trying to get ready to move.

I've been having nightmares again. Scenarios of recurrence. I wake up feeling deeply disturbed and scared.

I explained this to my psychiatrist this past week. She's hoping that once we move into our new home I will be able to settle down and focus more on my own healing process.

My psychiatrist prescribed Amitriptyline which is a type of medicine called a tricyclic antidepressant and is used frequently as a sleep aid. She told me I could take the amitriptyline in conjunction with my zopiclone. I did this last night because I found I so stressed and new I wouldn't sleep.

Prior to taking the meds however, my MIL called and asked to talk with me. She left this message on our voicemail. So, reluctantly I called her back as she sounded like something was very wrong.

She had received her latest mammogram results back this week and the news isn't good. She's being sent directly to the BC Cancer Agency next week hopefully for biopsies. She has had two incidents of very early DCIS BC twice in the past. Because she has already received radiation on both of her breasts, she cannot have radiation again. So, if the biopsies come back with the results as the doc expects them too, she will be having a mastectomy.

I think she called me seeking sympathy and support. This after saying to my face that she thinks I "use my BC as an excuse for my life", that I "use the cancer card" at every turn and opportunity. This after telling us we have to move a.s.a.p.

Emotionally I feel numb and confused. I don't want to have any relationship with this woman. I'm sorry she may be facing cancer a third time, but I just can't give her the support she's seeking. Not after all that has been said and done.

I'm also finding the side effects of the amitriptyline and zopiclone are leaving me feeling dazed, tired and highly emotional today. I'm crying and just feel overwhelmed.

I've taken the amitriptyline on it's own previously, but my psychiatrist suggested taking it with zopiclone because I have been sleeping.

Have any of you had this happen? I feel so low. So sad.

Comments

  • natly15
    natly15 Member Posts: 1,941
    #2
    We all get those down days.
    We all get those down days. I'm having one myself today. I don't take any of the meds you mentioned but I do believe that until your body becomes acclimated you could have the type of emotional reaction you have described. If it continues call the doctor. Some meds don't agree with us.

    I'm so sorry for all your troubles with your MIL. Based on some of your past comments she sounds as tho she drinks a bit too much and sounds unstable. You and your family have been terribly hurt by this woman who seems to have no compassion for your situation. If you feel you cannot support her if she has another dx so be it. I would say this tho, having bitterness towards her will harm you. It is very difficult to forgive those who hurt us so terribly, but holding on to our anger does nothing good for our bodies. You dont have to support her but dont let her antagonize you any further by holding on to your hurt. Hope tomorrow is a better day for you. (((HUGS)))
  • Lynn Smith
    Lynn Smith Member Posts: 1,264 Member
    #3
    natly15 said:

    We all get those down days.
    We all get those down days. I'm having one myself today. I don't take any of the meds you mentioned but I do believe that until your body becomes acclimated you could have the type of emotional reaction you have described. If it continues call the doctor. Some meds don't agree with us.

    I'm so sorry for all your troubles with your MIL. Based on some of your past comments she sounds as tho she drinks a bit too much and sounds unstable. You and your family have been terribly hurt by this woman who seems to have no compassion for your situation. If you feel you cannot support her if she has another dx so be it. I would say this tho, having bitterness towards her will harm you. It is very difficult to forgive those who hurt us so terribly, but holding on to our anger does nothing good for our bodies. You dont have to support her but dont let her antagonize you any further by holding on to your hurt. Hope tomorrow is a better day for you. (((HUGS)))

    Worry about
    Worry about yourself than the problems she is causing.I've had so many problems with my 2 daughters-in-law I said NO more.WE have one living in our camper out back at our house but we talk very little.I need to focus on me. I told my son to let his wife know this.Working good so far for me.I've done this alot lately.People give me flack I just pass them off.Most of the time I'm lucky and won't be seeing them. BUT if I do run into them I shove them aside and speak very little if any. Now it has to be bad before I do this.It would have to be something that happened over and over.If it won't stop I STOP it.

    I feel sorry for your mother-in-law.Ive been dx with DCIS but had no radiation or chemo so I guess if it came back I MIGHT be able to get by with a lumpectomy again.But sounds like your mother-in-law will need a masectomy. Support her and listen but concentrate on you.

    I agree with Natly.Don't support her but don't let her antagonize you.That is where I am heading.AND it's working. I have come to the point I want to be left alone.

    I've never had nightmares of my cancer returning.That would be scary.I have strange dreams occasionally but not often.I sleep so sound now I worry about that but think I am just exhausted.

    Lynn Smith
  • disneyfan2008
    disneyfan2008 Member Posts: 6,583 Member
    #4
    I dont' have any helpful
    I dont' have any helpful advice..just thinking of you

    Denise
  • SIROD
    SIROD Member Posts: 2,194 Member
    #5
    MIL
    I have read your postings and feel sorry about the situation that you are now dealing with in regards to your MIL.

    Remember that the same service that you have partaken are available to your MIL also. Just leave a voicemail stating that for your own well being you can not help her at this time. Suggest that she contact her own mental health person. Don't feel guilty, she wasn't exactly helpful to you during your ordeal.

    Remember that only 30% recur and there is every good chance that you will go on to live your life without dealing with breast cancer again. It is hard to see that the light has finally arrived at the end of the tunnel. It has and try to now to put it all behind you. Fix up your house, plan for that semester in college in January, enjoy your children and husband, your most important assets.

    Be well.

    Doris

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