message from my hubby, re: eating

Daisylin
Daisylin Member Posts: 365
in Esophageal Cancer #1
Hello everyone, this is Chantal's husband Lee.

What a wonderful resource this board is. Great to see a bunch of people come together and help and support each other. I wanted to take a moment to write about my dilemma, as I've not been able to find much info online.

Over the last few months, I've built up an incredibly strong food aversion. It's not revulsion, it's.... antipathy. If I see a TV commercial with a big steak or pizza or whatever (food that used to make me slobber), it just exists, like an ad for a couch or a pair of shoes. I don't seem to acknowledge it as a food. Just a few months ago I could chow down on a cheeseburger with the best of 'em and love it, now I just don't want to .

I rarely feel any appetite whatsoever, and to force myself to eat. I need to sort of mentally "scan" our cupboards until something catches my eye. I could strongly prefer eggs one day and not stand them the next.

When I eat, I need to read to think about mundane things like the weather or haircuts or something stupid and not think of eating. If I stray and start to focus on the eating my gag reflex will kick in and that's the end of the meal. The taste of food doesn't seem altered, I just don't care what it tastes like. Another tip from this site that helps is to read while I'm eating.

When I do eat a meal (say, 3/4 of can of canned pasta), pain blooms from my esophageous and pain radiates up into my neck and face, resulting in a headache and a strong feeling of fear.

We went grocery shopping this morning, and I noticed that I became more and more repulsed by the food in the store as we shopped.

I recognize that this a psychological reaction to the eating, and it's frustrating to my logical mind that I can't just say "eat it, you idiot! It looks good!". I've been reading about bulemia etc. which are related symptoms but nothing more out there.

Also note that "hey Lee, eat healthy veggies and fruit..." is simply impossible. I seem to choose foods based on texture more than anything else, and one day I may have a bowl of soup and the next day a few cookies. I'll take the calories anywhere I can get them :). I've lost 13 lbs in the last month and am likely consuming less than 1000 calories a day.

At this point I'm considering hypnotherapy to get my mojo back. Any feedback would be appreciated!

best to all,

www.yurbo.com/leescancer

Comments

  • hopper52
    hopper52 Member Posts: 108
    #2
    ME TOO
    Hi,

    I know EXACTLY what you're talking about. I finished chemo/radiation 3 weeks ago and I still can't get the motivation to eat anything substantial. I've lost about 40 lbs since my diagnosis and I keep dropping. I try to enough milkshakes to keep some kind of calorie input but if my goal is 3 a day, I may make 2. When my wife cooks something just the smell makes me nauseous. I envision different things to eat and occasionally something sounds appealing, once I make it I lose interest and can maybe eat a few bites but that's about it. As stated by you, everything tastes okay but the desire is not there. I have to start putting on a few pounds or it may jeopardize my surgery options if I keep going down. I'm 3 weeks away from my PET/CT and my surgeon consult. If anyone has some suggestions it would be greatly appreciated.

    Here's a recipie for a shake that Moffit gave me. It's 650 calories.

    1 cup ice cream
    1 packet Carnation instant breakfast
    1 cup of milk

    (to add 400 more calories and for a change of taste I add 2 Reeses "Big Cup" peanut butter cups.)

    If anyone has any suggestions I would love to hear from you.

    Michael Daniels (T3N0M0)
    Brandon, FL
  • BMGky
    BMGky Member Posts: 621
    #3
    Eating issues
    My husband during his treatment became a difficult eater. Once, before treatment, if it could stay on the plate 10 seconds, it would be consumed whether it was good food or not.

    Then the treatments started, We went through binges. One day, he could eat oatmeal. Go out buy supply of oatmeal. Then, a day or two later, no more oatmeal. Ate popsicles for a while and then none. Food didn't taste good, and he had no appetite. He didn't want to smell food nor see food. This continued for awhile after his surgery. Had a hard time adjusting. Doctor gave him some medication to improve his appetite but it didn't seem to help.

    The continuing effects of chemotherapy can be a contributor in some instances. He relied on his jtube feedings to keep him going before the surgery. He was weaned off of it after surgery. Still had a hard time holding weight. It was a battle. Slowly, as he healed and started feeling stronger, he started eating somewhat better. He loved steak at this time. It took nearly a year for his weight not to be a battle. We watch it closely. Now, that his appetite has returned and food tastes good, we watch to be certain he doesn't gain too much. Still has to be careful about quantity and texture. Hopefully, all else is going well for you. If so, the appetite should get better. Keep us posted.
  • TerryV
    TerryV Member Posts: 887
    #4
    hopper52 said:

    ME TOO
    Hi,

    I know EXACTLY what you're talking about. I finished chemo/radiation 3 weeks ago and I still can't get the motivation to eat anything substantial. I've lost about 40 lbs since my diagnosis and I keep dropping. I try to enough milkshakes to keep some kind of calorie input but if my goal is 3 a day, I may make 2. When my wife cooks something just the smell makes me nauseous. I envision different things to eat and occasionally something sounds appealing, once I make it I lose interest and can maybe eat a few bites but that's about it. As stated by you, everything tastes okay but the desire is not there. I have to start putting on a few pounds or it may jeopardize my surgery options if I keep going down. I'm 3 weeks away from my PET/CT and my surgeon consult. If anyone has some suggestions it would be greatly appreciated.

    Here's a recipie for a shake that Moffit gave me. It's 650 calories.

    1 cup ice cream
    1 packet Carnation instant breakfast
    1 cup of milk

    (to add 400 more calories and for a change of taste I add 2 Reeses "Big Cup" peanut butter cups.)

    If anyone has any suggestions I would love to hear from you.

    Michael Daniels (T3N0M0)
    Brandon, FL

    Husband is having same issue
    Nick has found biscuits with sausage gravy to be fairly tasty. Or French Toast. Grilled cheese with bacon on it went well also.

    Most fruit has kept its flavor. But some days he wants, some he doesn't. Just like all the other foods.

    @Lee - I've been following Chantal's posts. You seem to have an amazing wife. She's a very strong person. That comes from having a strong husband. You are both in my prayers.

    @Michael - I've been following along with you as well. You are ahead of us by 3 weeks and 3 days.

    Best wishes to us all as we wrestle with this disease!
  • jojoshort
    jojoshort Member Posts: 230 Member
    #5
    Same story with hubby
    Lee, it may not be a "psychological" problem at all. Just saying, Steve was the same way with food as you folks here are describing. This was from the chemo. He knew he had to eat, but his body totally was turned off by eating. He hasn't had any chemo since mid May, and he still has issues with food, although it's gotten LOTS better.
    I can't offer anything about the pain and headache, though.
    Glad to hear from you and hoping you can find some relief.
    Jo-Ann

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