How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are?

soccerfreaks said:

"Old man, look at my life, I'm a lot like you were"
(Neil Young reference)

I am apt to ramble here, sea, but let me start by saying that my answer to your question would likely be different from day to day, maybe from hour to hour .

I used to have a theory (sort of) that children were mirrors with legs. In fact I think I wrote a poem along that line. The idea was that kids serve as mirrors for us, that their development reminds us that we, too, are getting older, while, before they come along, we don't have any constant reminders that we pay attention to. I'm not sure I buy that so much any more (the older you get, it seems, the more 'reminders' there are out there.) But...now I have grandkids, young ones, and it is happening again but even moreso because they are not in my presence on a regular basis. If I see them once or twice a month, I am lucky, but I am also made keenly aware, by their development, that time flies when you are having fun .

The point, I guess, is that kids (and grandkids by extension) make us older by default. No. They don't make us older, they make us SEE that we are older. (I know a certain woman who reverts to childhood when she is around her grandchildren, after all.) Before them, without them, we are free to ignore aging references (mostly) and to behave as we did as young adults (to some extent, any way).

I said I might ramble .

Another old theory of mine was that women who have children grow up faster than other women and faster even than their husbands, the fathers of their children (hopefully). My reasoning was that, generally, the maternal instinct is much stronger than the paternal one because the child came from within the mother while the father contributed, well, we know what he contributed, although I acknowledge that some contribute more than others in terms of time and effort during pregnancy and also acknowledge that this is a rather gross generalization.

But moms seem to act older than dads. Dads seem to want to keep their toys and their habits while moms, generally, seem to drop things by the wayside in the interest of these little beings that came from within them. I liken it, now, to what happens with a cancer diagnosis: there is that sense that mortality is slapping one in the face...it wakes a mom up (theoretically and excluding, apparently, certain people in the news of late), while dad is free to continue with whatever responsibilities he had prior to birth. If that makes any sense.

I'm not sure that has anything to do with your question.

I was 49 when I was first diagnosed. Because of dietary types of issues, I've lost a lot of pounds that I have not yet gained back and now at merely 55 when I look in a mirror I think I see a 70 year old man.

But I certainly do not feel that old, even with grandkids reminding me that I am getting older (:)) even with the current limitations in some abilities related to eating, lifting weights, excersie, yardwork, backpacking, mountain climbing (:))...I don't feel that old.

When they told me I had as little as 10 months to live (misdiagnosis, obviously) in 2007, I stopped aging, I suppose. So put me down for 51.

This morning .

Take care,

Joe

AussieMaddie said:

Favourite, defining decade
Definitely my twenties, for the same reason, Sea, that you prefer your 30's. It was in my 20's that I defined my spirituality which has been my greatest source of strength. It was also in my twenties that I shared more intellectually than in any other decade, and I loved that. Don't know why it has declined so much over the years. But then again, right now, my chemo brain hardly makes me a candidate for such sharing

I want to agree with your assessment of Joe's writing. Reading his reply to you, I smile to learn that he writes poetry as well. It doesn't come as a surprise. Phil is another person who writes particularly well I think. He always seems to have the best questions.

Everyone has a particular skill or quality that is attractive, especially as we strive to give and support each other here.

One thing this present decade has given me more than anything else is the ability to see that attractivness in others.

For now,

AussieMaddie