My Fathers udate after surgery yesterday....pretty good so far
The surgeon did find the source and it is on the very back of his tongue about the size of a pencil eraser, as it was put.
My father does have a very large insision.. I don't want to scare anybody but it basically goes from ear to ear all the way down to his collar bone. I couldn't handle it at first. It took me about an hout to finally walk in and kep from getting upset. Nobody wants to see their loved ones in pain. Its tough to say the least.
All we can do is take it one day at a time. He is concious, yappin my ear off, walkin around, and seems to be doing great.
I will keep you updated.
Jason
Comments
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take your cues from your Dad
Hi Jason, seems your father is recovering well. If he is yaking away things are good for the moment. The scar is scary but looks worse than it is. Your dad and I have some similarities. Mine was also base of the tongue and was described about the size of a pencil eraser. This is a small tumor! I also had some spread which was wrapped around a cervical node which scared me at first as the surgeon left it for radiation and chemo. FYI that plan of attack seems to have worked so far and the cancer is no longer wrapped around my node. Make sure you get copies of the biopsies and have them test for the HPV virus. Time for some recuperation. You sound like a great son!0 -
Agreedratface said:take your cues from your Dad
Hi Jason, seems your father is recovering well. If he is yaking away things are good for the moment. The scar is scary but looks worse than it is. Your dad and I have some similarities. Mine was also base of the tongue and was described about the size of a pencil eraser. This is a small tumor! I also had some spread which was wrapped around a cervical node which scared me at first as the surgeon left it for radiation and chemo. FYI that plan of attack seems to have worked so far and the cancer is no longer wrapped around my node. Make sure you get copies of the biopsies and have them test for the HPV virus. Time for some recuperation. You sound like a great son!
I agree with Ratface, if it doesn't bother your father - or if he successfully pretends that it doesn't - then you can't let it bother you (in front of him). I am a couple of months out from neck dissection on the right side. I had nowhere near as big an incision as your father but it was pretty good - ear to below chin.
You know what, it is already not that noticeable. It blends in with other creases and as long as we massage out the wattle and fluid accumulation, not that bad. The first week with the drains was pretty horrible for both the patient and viewers. My mother almost got sick at the pic we posted on our caringbridge site (dougiebaker) but that phase was less than a week. Then another week for the stitches to come out. And then I went back to playing hockey. I wore a turtleneck for the first few games and still got somebody's stick right across the scar. It held together though. So, on the outside, there is hope.
As for the inside, rads and chemo and all, we've pretty much all been through all of it and it is not fun. But it is survivable. The support of my family including my children, was so critical. It is great that you can be there for him.
Keep us posted and don't ever think about not being honest about your fears and doubts here or on the Caregivers site because that's what we're here for. Doug0 -
JasonGoalie said:Agreed
I agree with Ratface, if it doesn't bother your father - or if he successfully pretends that it doesn't - then you can't let it bother you (in front of him). I am a couple of months out from neck dissection on the right side. I had nowhere near as big an incision as your father but it was pretty good - ear to below chin.
You know what, it is already not that noticeable. It blends in with other creases and as long as we massage out the wattle and fluid accumulation, not that bad. The first week with the drains was pretty horrible for both the patient and viewers. My mother almost got sick at the pic we posted on our caringbridge site (dougiebaker) but that phase was less than a week. Then another week for the stitches to come out. And then I went back to playing hockey. I wore a turtleneck for the first few games and still got somebody's stick right across the scar. It held together though. So, on the outside, there is hope.
As for the inside, rads and chemo and all, we've pretty much all been through all of it and it is not fun. But it is survivable. The support of my family including my children, was so critical. It is great that you can be there for him.
Keep us posted and don't ever think about not being honest about your fears and doubts here or on the Caregivers site because that's what we're here for. Doug
Hi Jason,
Thought I'd jump in here and give some reassurance about nodes and jugular veins. My primary was different (tight tonsil SCC) but I had mets to 11 nodes. 10 on right side and 1 on left side. My ENT had planned on taking all 11 nodes out via surgery. When he got in he found one node on each side of my neck had wrapped around a jugular vein (I didn't even know til that time that we had 2 jugulars). He removed 10 nodes on the right side along with the jugular and some tissue (muscle, nerves, etc.). He decided to leave the node on my left side because he didn't want to take any chances on removing the second one, being it was so close to the other jugular. So I had 10 nodes removed and 1 left in. They were counting on rad/chemo to get the last node. It worked. I'm 13 months out and NED.
I'll agree with Ratface in that the scarring looks initially a lot worse than it feels. Also like Doug, the scar blends in pretty quickly. I have a "divot" in my neck from taking out some muscle, etc. but it's not that noticeable and it doesn't matter as I was never too pretty to begin with. I freaked a lot visitors out at first and everyone was commenting (or just staring) at my neck, but to me it never was a big deal. I had tonsillectomy, neck dissection and rad/chemo. Neck dissection for me was by far the easiest of those procedures (remember everyone is different). I do have permanent nerve damage to my right side of my face. I didn't lose any movement, I just can't feel anything from cheek to collarbone - just makes shaving interesting everyday. Also due to moving some nerves around during surgery they warned me about shoulder difficulties in the future. I never experienced that as I have 100% mobility in that shoulder and no lingering pain. I started stretching and exercising the shoulder soon after surgery and did PT also, which I thought really helped.
Sounds like your dad is doing well. I'm sure it helps with you supporting him. Keep up the good work!
Positive thoughts!
Greg0 -
Jason, glad to hear your dadGreg53 said:Jason
Hi Jason,
Thought I'd jump in here and give some reassurance about nodes and jugular veins. My primary was different (tight tonsil SCC) but I had mets to 11 nodes. 10 on right side and 1 on left side. My ENT had planned on taking all 11 nodes out via surgery. When he got in he found one node on each side of my neck had wrapped around a jugular vein (I didn't even know til that time that we had 2 jugulars). He removed 10 nodes on the right side along with the jugular and some tissue (muscle, nerves, etc.). He decided to leave the node on my left side because he didn't want to take any chances on removing the second one, being it was so close to the other jugular. So I had 10 nodes removed and 1 left in. They were counting on rad/chemo to get the last node. It worked. I'm 13 months out and NED.
I'll agree with Ratface in that the scarring looks initially a lot worse than it feels. Also like Doug, the scar blends in pretty quickly. I have a "divot" in my neck from taking out some muscle, etc. but it's not that noticeable and it doesn't matter as I was never too pretty to begin with. I freaked a lot visitors out at first and everyone was commenting (or just staring) at my neck, but to me it never was a big deal. I had tonsillectomy, neck dissection and rad/chemo. Neck dissection for me was by far the easiest of those procedures (remember everyone is different). I do have permanent nerve damage to my right side of my face. I didn't lose any movement, I just can't feel anything from cheek to collarbone - just makes shaving interesting everyday. Also due to moving some nerves around during surgery they warned me about shoulder difficulties in the future. I never experienced that as I have 100% mobility in that shoulder and no lingering pain. I started stretching and exercising the shoulder soon after surgery and did PT also, which I thought really helped.
Sounds like your dad is doing well. I'm sure it helps with you supporting him. Keep up the good work!
Positive thoughts!
Greg
Jason, glad to hear your dad is doing ok. The incision does look pretty wicked when it's first done. It will calm down. I only had my left side done, from collar bone to ear, and then they went from ear under the jaw line to the middle of my chin. Sounds like half of what your dad had done.
I was really scared going in, because I didn't know if the surgery would disfigure my face, (guess I'm vain, but ya I was worried) but it turned out far better than my anxious mind thought it could be. I was actually relieved when I saw myself after surgery.
The only thing I wish, is that they would have sent me to physical therapy afterwards. I don't know if it would have helped me, but my neck hurts everyday, my arm and hand are weak and my neck mobility sucks. I did do my own exercises, and I got my left arm to raise above my shoulder and it does come up just a couple inches shy of my head, which is way better than it was at least.
The new thing with my left arm and hand is that it's constantly numb now. I will be trying to hold stuff in my hand and it just falls out, my grip is very weak.0 -
Hi Jasonsweetblood22 said:Jason, glad to hear your dad
Jason, glad to hear your dad is doing ok. The incision does look pretty wicked when it's first done. It will calm down. I only had my left side done, from collar bone to ear, and then they went from ear under the jaw line to the middle of my chin. Sounds like half of what your dad had done.
I was really scared going in, because I didn't know if the surgery would disfigure my face, (guess I'm vain, but ya I was worried) but it turned out far better than my anxious mind thought it could be. I was actually relieved when I saw myself after surgery.
The only thing I wish, is that they would have sent me to physical therapy afterwards. I don't know if it would have helped me, but my neck hurts everyday, my arm and hand are weak and my neck mobility sucks. I did do my own exercises, and I got my left arm to raise above my shoulder and it does come up just a couple inches shy of my head, which is way better than it was at least.
The new thing with my left arm and hand is that it's constantly numb now. I will be trying to hold stuff in my hand and it just falls out, my grip is very weak.
Glad it is over but sorry to hear the nodes was wrapped around the juggler vein. Chemo and radiation should take care of the other on the left side. I too had lymph nodes on right side infected and with cancer but ops for no surgery. It is gone now but the old scar tissue is still there as a reminder.
All the best to you and Dad.
Hondo0 -
Will doratface said:take your cues from your Dad
Hi Jason, seems your father is recovering well. If he is yaking away things are good for the moment. The scar is scary but looks worse than it is. Your dad and I have some similarities. Mine was also base of the tongue and was described about the size of a pencil eraser. This is a small tumor! I also had some spread which was wrapped around a cervical node which scared me at first as the surgeon left it for radiation and chemo. FYI that plan of attack seems to have worked so far and the cancer is no longer wrapped around my node. Make sure you get copies of the biopsies and have them test for the HPV virus. Time for some recuperation. You sound like a great son!
I will ask them about that biopsy. I have read about HPV and thanks for the reminder! When they cleaned up the soochers, cleaned the iodine off and the rest of the dried blood, it is actually pretty amazing how well they used the creases to hide the future "SCAR". One nurse that was giving him an IV, didnt even notice without him lifting his chin up. Its amazing what some of these doctors can do.
Thanks again..0 -
Thanks Everyone!!
Thanks everyone for the advice, and comments. My father seems to be doing pretty good considering everything that has happened. He has a full appetite, just can't do a whole lot about it right now as he cannot swallow the greatest just yet with the swollen throat and the hole in the top of his hard pallet on the roof of his mouth. I found the nurses station yesterday morning, which is like a little room full of goodies for the patients, and spotted some vinalla and chochlate Glucerna and have been giving him all of that he wants. Ounce for ounce its the best stuff he can efficiently swallow, so Glucerna it is and lots of it!
My Father has not gone 1 single minute without someone in my family beside him. I am beside him now as I write this. Since Thursday 5 may, I have been home for a total of 5 hrs and that was just to get changed, a shower, and a nap. I currently live about an hour from the hospital and don't want to make too many trips so I just stay here with him,,,,,its best for me that I do anyhow. Its the least I can do for him.0
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