expressing emotions

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Comments

  • KathiM
    KathiM Member Posts: 8,028 Member
    #22
    jjaj133 said:

    Thanks Buzz, as for people
    Thanks Buzz, as for people listening? i don't believe people want to think about their own mortality. Life goes on for them. My sister had breast cancer back in 1963. Her "friends" crossed the street when they saw her coming. Today they do so mentally.
    I used to volunter as a mediator. When my husband of 33 yrs dropped dead of a heart attack at 52 yrs old. I had to stop. I could no longer listen to people whining about shared driveways and kids balls going into their yards. Today facing my 3rd battle with the beast. I would probably reach across the table and choke them!!! How is that for a good mediator!!!! They just don't get it. Sadly they wont till it hits home.
    I just wish I knew about this forum when I had my first diagnosis. I wish we had a card to put into hospital rest rooms, lobbies, to tell people about this. (is there one and I missed it?) I worked for a domestic abuse org. and we left our number where people could access it privately as well as in the open.
    I just feel there must be more people who need this. what do you all think?
    Love ya back,
    Judy

    I carry a pamphlet stack with me....
    from the American Cancer Society. It speaks to CSN, but also the other programs they offer like reach to recovery and man to man and road to recovery....

    With any place I go, where I see other literature, I ask if I can leave some of mine...

    Just don't say "Rectum" unless you want some strong wincing!!! *smile*

    Hugs, Kathi
  • jjaj133
    jjaj133 Member Posts: 867 Member
    #23
    KathiM said:

    I carry a pamphlet stack with me....
    from the American Cancer Society. It speaks to CSN, but also the other programs they offer like reach to recovery and man to man and road to recovery....

    With any place I go, where I see other literature, I ask if I can leave some of mine...

    Just don't say "Rectum" unless you want some strong wincing!!! *smile*

    Hugs, Kathi

    Great Idea, will start
    Great Idea, will start looking for that, also facebook. Will reach a lot of people there!!!
    Tactfully of course!!!
    Hugs to you,'Judy
  • Kathryn_in_MN
    Kathryn_in_MN Member Posts: 1,252 Member
    #24
    Always
    I've always been very open about discussing just about anything. That hasn't changed. Some of my friends and family think I am too open, but that is me - take it or leave it. Once in a while I don't have as much tact as I could, but one thing is for sure, everyone knows where they stand with me. I don't play games - everything is laid out on the line.
  • ron50
    ron50 Member Posts: 1,723 Member
    #25
    Sometimes why do we bother,
    At first I was a vocal advocate for be your own saviour ,look after your own health etc etc etc. I told my story to friends and relitives to try and change their ideas on health and what they needed to do to ensure a ca free life. I don't think anyone listened,I really don't think they cared. The comments I hear from my old friends now are"ÿou can't have beeen as bad as you said you were or you would not still be alive".
    I really don't know why I have survived as long as I have . I often wonder if it is because I did not ever care one way or another if I did or not. I don't say that to upset anyone just to express an opinnion that life is not as precious to some as it is to others.
    There are very few highlights in my life now. I am sitting here trying to get my hands to work properly enough to type,knowing that I have to go to work in an hour so that I can pay the rent on this termite riddled dump i call home.
    For me life since ca has been a constant struggle against poor health and a gradual lessening of quality of life. I find I do most things alone so that I don't inflict mysely on anyone. I could play the blame game but realistically sometimes thats just the way life is. Ron.
  • thxmiker
    thxmiker Member Posts: 1,278 Member
    #26
    I believe people have a
    I believe people have a change of heart. Buzz put it well, when one's life changes soooo dramatically we get perspective on what is really important in life.

    I learned to put my emotions out there. My perspective changed. I told all of the people important to me, how I valued them. Especially my wife.

    Best Always, mike
  • TMac52
    TMac52 Member Posts: 352
    #27
    KathiM said:

    I carry a pamphlet stack with me....
    from the American Cancer Society. It speaks to CSN, but also the other programs they offer like reach to recovery and man to man and road to recovery....

    With any place I go, where I see other literature, I ask if I can leave some of mine...

    Just don't say "Rectum" unless you want some strong wincing!!! *smile*

    Hugs, Kathi

    Damn near killed um.
  • eibod
    eibod Member Posts: 160
    #28
    I agree with you. This site
    I agree with you. This site really brings out the deep feelings that people have. I am
    also amazed at the amount of caring that is shown here. I am a caregiver, my husband
    is the one with cancer. I can't get him to take part in the site, but he is interested
    in hearing about the comments, and they have been so helpful. I don't know of any other
    place that you can vent and let your feelings fly. Wish I had known about it when he
    was first diagnosed. I dont know if I have ever experienced the hopelessness or helplessness that we went through then. I work for myself, and didn't take any new
    contracts for a year, because he was so ill. He had to retire early, was too sick to
    work. So life changed completely for us both. He doesn't discuss feelings, doesn't discuss what could happen if the treatments don't work. I don't know what he is thinking and most of the time don't know what he is feeling about it. I know he is depressed,
    which is normal, and his hopes go up and down. It helps to read what those who have
    the illness feel. Hopefully that will help me be a better caregiver. I want to be
    the best support that I can be for him, but also want to stay strong for myself and what
    may come..
    It is a hard job....

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