Mastectomy vs. Lumpectomy???

Ok this is a toughy

I was diagnosed with an aggressive form of stage 2 breast cancer in October at the age of 22. This is the last week of my chemo treatment and my tumor has completely melted away (praise the lord). I still have to have surgery because there was cancer found in my armpit lymph nodes. I want to preserve my breasts to be able to enjoy my 20's and 30's, by having a lumpectomy, which my doctor has given me the option of doing. She is a fabulous and very progressive doctor that wants nothing more than to give women options. She said she feels if I watch my breasts closely that I can avoid having a mastectomy. the issue is that I tested positive for the BRAC 1 gene, meaning that I have a genetic mutation and this cancer is running rampant in my family, which it is. My mother had it twice, and she and my grandmother both passed away from it. Given this circumstance i personally feel like i would be doing myself a huge disservice by not having a double mastectomy. If i chose to have the lumpectomy, I would have to worry for the next 50+ years that another tumor will develop. Realistically I feel having a bilateral mastectomy it is the right thing to do but i'm so hesitant because of my age and my plans for the future. I am well aware that there are things much more important than breasts, but try telling that to yourself once they're already gone.

I guess I just want to have my cake and eat it too. Im scheduled to have surgery on March 28th. I hope someone can help guide me to the right answer..i'm so conflicted.

Comments

  • CypressCynthia
    CypressCynthia Member Posts: 4,014 Member
    That is a toughy! You are so
    That is a toughy! You are so very young and my prayers are with you. I have had times where I miss my breasts, but, mostly, I'm just glad to be alive. I didn't have a choice about my first mastectomy as I had a large tumor and a small breast--docs said a lumpectomy wouldn't be cosmetic. After 2 sisters also had breast cancer, I had the second breast removed preventively. That time, I had reconstruction at the same time (a free flap) and that boob is very natural and great looking. Not having a large cancer to deal with made a huge cosmetic difference.

    But I am in no way telling you what to do. I realize that you have an agonizing decision ahead of you. Really talk with your docs and, if you are considering bilateral mastectomies, shop around and ask the plastic surgeon to discuss their techniques and show you their photos.

    Whatever your decision is, please know that everyone here will support you and understand. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
  • MAJW
    MAJW Member Posts: 2,510 Member
    I wish...
    I could give you the answer...you 're so very young...my heart goes out to you...as a mother, I just want to wrap my arms around you...I, too, had a very aggressive form of bc...triple negative...but no lymph node involvement. I was stage II...I had a lumpectomy, then chemo and radiation..I do not have the gene mutation...no family history...
    I wouldn't dare tell you which way to go...I wish I could..it has to be your decision guided by your physician...every case is different...if you decide on the bilateral mastectomy, have you discussed breast reconstruction with your doctor? I know many on this board have had that done..I'm sure they can share their experience with you...also I understand there is a YOUNG bc cancer survivor discussion board...you might want to check that board also for young women going through exactly the same as you...
    I am so sorry you're going through this at such a tender age...any age to have bc is awful but you 're so young! Please, please keep us posted on your progress...You will find such caring, compassionate women who can share their experiences on this board.

    I wish you peace in making your decision and sending you prayers,
    Nancy
  • disneyfan2008
    disneyfan2008 Member Posts: 6,583 Member
    so sorry you are going through this..
    I didnt' have to decided between the two options-My BC was taken care of with LUMPectomy and radiation! I am sure deciding is very difficult-I wish you the best in your decision!

    Denise
  • dbhadra
    dbhadra Member Posts: 344 Member

    so sorry you are going through this..
    I didnt' have to decided between the two options-My BC was taken care of with LUMPectomy and radiation! I am sure deciding is very difficult-I wish you the best in your decision!

    Denise

    you are so young...
    and sounds like you are dealing with everything so bravely! God bless you.

    I've made a decision to have a double mastectomy,as I don ;t want to have to keep checking and worrying about my other breast. I'm BRCA negative, but have a strong family history of breast cancer. I may or may not do reconstruction after a year or two; I have to wait that long due to radiation. For the reconstruction, since my breasts are rather, um, large, apparently you get a better "match" if you have both removed and then remade. OF course, sensation would be lost, and it's a huge thing emotionally. I;m 44 and I do not know what decision I would have made at 22 under your circumstances.

    I do know that you will make the right decision FOR YOU! Gather your information, talk to everyone, say your prayers, and go with your gut! That's my advice for what it's worth.

    Wishing you all the best,

    Laura
  • roseann4
    roseann4 Member Posts: 992 Member
    dbhadra said:

    you are so young...
    and sounds like you are dealing with everything so bravely! God bless you.

    I've made a decision to have a double mastectomy,as I don ;t want to have to keep checking and worrying about my other breast. I'm BRCA negative, but have a strong family history of breast cancer. I may or may not do reconstruction after a year or two; I have to wait that long due to radiation. For the reconstruction, since my breasts are rather, um, large, apparently you get a better "match" if you have both removed and then remade. OF course, sensation would be lost, and it's a huge thing emotionally. I;m 44 and I do not know what decision I would have made at 22 under your circumstances.

    I do know that you will make the right decision FOR YOU! Gather your information, talk to everyone, say your prayers, and go with your gut! That's my advice for what it's worth.

    Wishing you all the best,

    Laura

    I wool follow the path of Christina Applegate.
    Such a terrible decision to have to make at any age but you have so many wonderful years ahead of you. We can give you our opinions but we don't have a crystal ball. Personally, I would want to know that I wouldn't ever find another lump.

    When I'm in a tough spot, I ask myself what I would suggest to my best friend. That helps me make a decision.

    Roseann
  • Gabe N Abby Mom
    Gabe N Abby Mom Member Posts: 2,413
    It's too bad we don't have a
    It's too bad we don't have a crystal ball, we could look into the future and then we'd know the exact right answer. Since I don't have that, I can't tell you what to do. This has to be your decision. But from what you wrote, I can tell that you are a strong woman. That means that whatever you decide, it'll be a decision that will work for you.

    One thing to think about...can you see yourself going through chemo again IF the bc monster comes back? I would ask the doc about what your options are if you face reoccurrence, would chemo be an option? After my surgery, I asked about chemo again (12 of 14 nodes were positive). I was told that I've already had the maximum amount.

    In the hope that you get something from it, here's my story...I drew the inflammatory triple negative BC card. Both IBC and triple neg are very aggressive, so I've been as aggressive as possible. Although I struggled with the decision, that meant a bilateral mastectomy...lumpectomy wasn't an option, but bilateral/unilateral was an option. My surgery was Jan 14th, and so far I'm happy with my decision. I have full range of motion on the right, and am seeing a PT to get my range of motion back on the left (where they took lymph nodes). I still have to face the reconstruction choice, it's not an option for me for a year because of the IBC.

    Whatever you choose, you will find support here...this is such a caring, giving group. Please come back and let us know how you're doing, and what you decide.

    Hugs,

    Linda
  • Jean 0609
    Jean 0609 Member Posts: 2,462
    Hi Margot,
    I am so sorry that you have to go through this. The decision is yours to make, no one can make it for you. It is whatever you feel comfortable with.

    I love your profile picture, you are beautiful. Keep smiling and keep a postive attitude. This will definitely help you through all this. We are here for you whenever you need us.

    xoxo,
    Jean
  • LoveBabyJesus
    LoveBabyJesus Member Posts: 1,679 Member
    From what I know
    Before Making a Decision, ask yourself these questions:
    1. What are my risks of getting this cancer?
    2. What are my risks of getting a new cancer?
    3. Am I OK dealing with this time after time?
    4. Would I have regrets later? removal vs. non-removal, then weigh them.
    5. What are my chances of survival? one vs. the other

    I am not trying to scare you at all, but trying to help you make a peaceful decision you can live with for the rest of your life. I am 32. Dealing with this too. However, I didn't carry the mutation. But, I am reconsidering removing them, because the thought of dealing with the anxiety kills me. Plus I want to look back and say, I tried all I could. This is just my thought. Going to start chemo this month, then radiation. Then meeting with my surgeon for a mamo, and talk about options for me.

    I think it also depends on what type of cancer you have and your prognosis, etc...WRITE all questions down before talking to your Dr. And be sure she answers them, and write down your notes. Go home, think about it, discuss it with your family members, pray and ask God to help you make the best decision...Good luck to you.

    Remember, it's our body, but our soul is the most beautiful part. And having peace of mind counts!
  • Hippiechick58
    Hippiechick58 Member Posts: 320

    From what I know
    Before Making a Decision, ask yourself these questions:
    1. What are my risks of getting this cancer?
    2. What are my risks of getting a new cancer?
    3. Am I OK dealing with this time after time?
    4. Would I have regrets later? removal vs. non-removal, then weigh them.
    5. What are my chances of survival? one vs. the other

    I am not trying to scare you at all, but trying to help you make a peaceful decision you can live with for the rest of your life. I am 32. Dealing with this too. However, I didn't carry the mutation. But, I am reconsidering removing them, because the thought of dealing with the anxiety kills me. Plus I want to look back and say, I tried all I could. This is just my thought. Going to start chemo this month, then radiation. Then meeting with my surgeon for a mamo, and talk about options for me.

    I think it also depends on what type of cancer you have and your prognosis, etc...WRITE all questions down before talking to your Dr. And be sure she answers them, and write down your notes. Go home, think about it, discuss it with your family members, pray and ask God to help you make the best decision...Good luck to you.

    Remember, it's our body, but our soul is the most beautiful part. And having peace of mind counts!

    We are all so different. You
    We are all so different. You are young to be facing this, yet your youth just might work in your favor. Whatever choice you decide to make, I'm sure you will heal faster due to your age. You got a lot of good suggestions from my pink sisters, and I would review them carefully and then speak to your Onc. I went with the BLMX for piece of mind. I have a lot of anxiety and could never be at peace with a unilateral. But that was my choice. You must do what is right for you.

    "May you be at Peace, May you be free of Suffering,"
    Dianne
  • Heatherbelle
    Heatherbelle Member Posts: 1,226 Member
    similar situation
    Hi Margot,
    I absolutely adore your picture, you are a beautiful lady with that pretty smile!! Here's my 2 cents, hopefully my experience with BC can be of some help to you.
    I was 34 at diagnosis. IDC in my right breast. I was also given the choice between lumpectomy + radiation, or mastectomy (both would require chemo, though). What I did to help me decide was I made an appt with a plastic surgeon -to find out what my reconstruction options were, if I decided on a mastectomy, and ALSO, what my reconstruction options would be depending on whether I got a single or double mastectomy. This helped me TREMENDOUSLY, because being in my 30's, my boobs are still important to me, too.
    I ended up having a bilateral mastectomy, with tissue expanders put in for reconstruction, and I had those exchanged for silicone gel implants in November. My thought was this: I would rather look back on this and think that I did too much to prevent this from coming back, than to have to go through it again and regret not doing enough.
    My boobs look pretty good for being fake, my scars are fading, my hair has grown back in and im adjusting to my new normal. I dont regret my decision at all & am confident that I've done everything I could to be healthy and cancer free. Best of luck to you in your decision, and in your future. If you need to chat, or have any questions that you dont feel comfortable posting on here, please private message me on here, I'm here for you (as we all are) :) I know it helps alot to talk with others who have been through it! Are you on facebook? Im under Heather Kaylor Grontkowski, send me a friend request! It's a bit easier & quicker to communicate on there.
    *hugs*
    Heather
  • Double Whammy
    Double Whammy Member Posts: 2,832 Member

    similar situation
    Hi Margot,
    I absolutely adore your picture, you are a beautiful lady with that pretty smile!! Here's my 2 cents, hopefully my experience with BC can be of some help to you.
    I was 34 at diagnosis. IDC in my right breast. I was also given the choice between lumpectomy + radiation, or mastectomy (both would require chemo, though). What I did to help me decide was I made an appt with a plastic surgeon -to find out what my reconstruction options were, if I decided on a mastectomy, and ALSO, what my reconstruction options would be depending on whether I got a single or double mastectomy. This helped me TREMENDOUSLY, because being in my 30's, my boobs are still important to me, too.
    I ended up having a bilateral mastectomy, with tissue expanders put in for reconstruction, and I had those exchanged for silicone gel implants in November. My thought was this: I would rather look back on this and think that I did too much to prevent this from coming back, than to have to go through it again and regret not doing enough.
    My boobs look pretty good for being fake, my scars are fading, my hair has grown back in and im adjusting to my new normal. I dont regret my decision at all & am confident that I've done everything I could to be healthy and cancer free. Best of luck to you in your decision, and in your future. If you need to chat, or have any questions that you dont feel comfortable posting on here, please private message me on here, I'm here for you (as we all are) :) I know it helps alot to talk with others who have been through it! Are you on facebook? Im under Heather Kaylor Grontkowski, send me a friend request! It's a bit easier & quicker to communicate on there.
    *hugs*
    Heather

    Just sending my support
    Dear Margot-
    So sorry you have to face this decision. As others have said, you're so young! My only advice is that you gather all the information you can about your options and connect with women who have faced this crisis and hear their stories. Since I'm old enough to not only be your mother, but your grandmother (horrors!) my decisions were made from an entirely different perspective than you.
    However, I'll be here to support any decision you make.

    Best,

    Suzanne
  • MyTurnNow
    MyTurnNow Member Posts: 2,686 Member
    What a beautiful smiling lady!
    My sisters have all given you great advice, as usual. Make this decision with your heart and the recommendations from your doctors. Then, don't look back and complete your treatments and get back to living life. It will never be like it was before but it can still be a wonderful and long life. I am sending you strength to make your decision. Good luck to my new little sister!
  • survivorbc09
    survivorbc09 Member Posts: 4,374 Member
    Jean 0609 said:

    Hi Margot,
    I am so sorry that you have to go through this. The decision is yours to make, no one can make it for you. It is whatever you feel comfortable with.

    I love your profile picture, you are beautiful. Keep smiling and keep a postive attitude. This will definitely help you through all this. We are here for you whenever you need us.

    xoxo,
    Jean

    I had a lumpectomy with
    I had a lumpectomy with rads, and, was very glad that I had that option. A lot of women don't have the option, they have to have a mastectomy.

    The one thing I do want to say about a mastectomy is that I think some don't realize that you will still have breast tissue left even after the mastectomy. They can never get all of it, as, it goes clear to your collarbone.


    But, the decision is yours and what your doctor recommends. Good luck.


    Jan
  • 24242
    24242 Member Posts: 1,398
    I too am sorry
    One must search their soul and do what is necessary to carry on in life...
    I was 36 at time of diagnosis though I had been ill for years finding my own lumps along the way.
    I think the one thing I kept in mind that I was doing the treatments there for I was actually going to give myself every opportunity to squeek out every tiny percentage point for longevity I could get. I truly didn't even want to start on the road of chemo feeling defeated from the start because I had to fight so long and hard to get someone to believe I knew something was terribly wrong. Too young and not sick enough it seemed to think I could even have cancer.
    Stage 3 triple negative with 11 out of 21 pos. nodes and yes within a year of the first mastectomy I had the other removed. It was advised from start that I have the mastectomies first and then 6 rounds of chemo cocktail then 15 radiation treatments. I am in Canada so often do heavier chemo and higher doses of radiation at a time. Don't know why?
    I have found lumps along the way and get them looked at that is all I can do is be aware. You can have a mastectomy and still have breast cancer again because they never get every single cell. I know a woman I met that has had Breast Cancer 4 times so it is possible and she was treated along the way.
    You my dear have to do what gives you the most hope for your own future. Some woman are attached to breasts and others we are not. I did not have reconstruction since surgery has come with own set of side effects for me. I honestly have never felt more like a woman than I ever have and that is do more to age than anything.
    My thoughts are with you and know we are all different...
    Tara