Coping With Stress of Cancer

cmpattberg

Hi.

I just turned 82 (1/28/44). I was diagnosed in Oct 2020. Early on I attended a support group for a couple of weeks. There was another man in the group, and he shared that he wrote poems and shared one with the group (only 4-5 ppl). I thought to myself that I could probably do that. As my kids were growing up we had made up poems with them. So I thought I'd give it a try.

I'd love to hear how others have occupied their brain so as to not have to many 'pitty parties'.

I ultimately have written poems during my cancer journey, 85 to date. I'm about to start again since my lung cancer has matastized to my brain. I had surgery in late March of 2025. I'm still above ground, but a bit pi$$ed off that it spread.

Anyway, here is my first poem (1 of 85). Please remember to tell me what you do - paint, sew, garden, sing, play an insturment, hunt, fish, etc……

Hey, You’ve Got Cancer! - #1

He said it so easy, 

like it was supposed to be.

Yet it felt like a bullet 

had been delivered to me.

What could I do but 

just say thanks for now.

But it made me sick 

and it furrowed my brow.

He was the resident doctor,

that day I was told.

Did that give him license 

to be short and so bold.

How do most find out

They’ve got cancer I thought.

Best done in private since 

your breath must be caught.

A lot to take in, 

should be done with some class.

But the doctor was hurried 

And gone in a flash.

I think I knew it was coming, 

the cancer that is.

I smoked long ago, 

so the blame was not his.

15 years I did smoke, 

then 49 I abstained.

High risk was I now 

and to cancer I’m chained.

I’m through radiation 

and the chemo process.

Stronger now, but it 

came with great mental stress.

My support group shows me 

that I can survive.

Equipped with this knowledge 

I’m happily alive.

All my family and friends 

they often did pray.

Which kept my anxiety 

and fear mostly at bay

amystorment

Hello CM. I read your post. My daughter is trying to get me to try poetry as well. I'm a caregiver. My husband was diagnosed with eye cancer (choroidal melanoma) on December 9, 2025. He has undergone the treatment, called plaque brachytherapy. He had a biopsy. That came back class A1, PRAME negative. This means that his risk of metastasis is low but not impossible. He will have CT scans every year to watch.

He has recently withdrawn a lot. Not wanting to talk. I don't understand because at first he was all confidence. He has a look on his face like he's angry. But he says he isn't. His treatment had seriously affected his vision in that eye. I guess he was hoping it wouldn't be that bad. I don't know what to do right now. Just trying to make sure his needs are met and stay near him. Cancer is hard.

cmpattberg

https://csn.cancer.org/discussion/comment/1726277#Comment_1726277

He is mad. Cancer sucks the life out of you. He has to fight back. Millions of ppl have health problems and worse. It is easier to give up. I have clean scans/MRIs now but the medication that I 'have' to take gives me some, rough to deal with, side effects.

Associating with others dealing with cancer is helpful. Helps to have a place where he can '****' a little and also find out that he could have gotten a worse cancer. The book or poems I wrote are on Amazon. "Hope in the Midst'. You can buy it there or I'll send it to you for free. I think you can click on my name or face and send me a direct message if you want me to send it. The poems might be helpful as they deal with some tender feelings I had/have.

Good luck.

amystorment

If it's okay I'll keep updating with you here. There hasn't been anyone to talk to about the eye cancer. Apparently it's pretty rare. I just got a message on the topic I started. Finally. This person has the same kind of eye cancer as my husband. I don't know if he'll stay in touch. I hope so.

amystorment

I meant to say that I hear you about your side affects . I'm sorry your are having to go through that. You can vent here. Things go in my ear and nowhere else. I don't judge or argue.