Brother diagnosed with stage 4 colorectal cancer

SuperChicken66

My brother was diagnosed with colorectal cancer 2 years ago and had his colon removed. Then 4 or 5 months ago, he was again diagnosed, this time with stage 4 cancer. It has spread to the kidneys and lymph nodes and was given a year to live. He is wasting away so quickly going from 160lbs. to only 114lbs. He hardly eats anything because it causes abdominal pain and or makes him nauseous.

I am disabled with essential tremor, severe anxiety (from a TBI) and sciatica. I had moved in with him 8 years ago so I could have a roof over my head. Now I have no idea what I'm going to do or where I'm going to end up. Needless to say, I am more scared than I ever had been in my life. My parents died several years ago and all of my friends are dead as well. Once he is gone, I will be literally all alone for my first time ever. I am 59 and he is 62. I guess I am looking for any help or emotional support I can find. I heard about this forum and thought I'd give it a shot.

mak1970

https://csn.cancer.org/discussion/329702/brother-diagnosed-with-stage-4-colorectal-cancer

I am so sorry that you are in this situation, and I hope that your brother is not in too much pain. Where are you located? There may be social services available to help you with housing and other needs. Please reply and someone will be able to help find resources for you.

SuperChicken66

https://csn.cancer.org/discussion/comment/1724674#Comment_1724674

My brother coincidentally passed away this morning from complications of pneumonia. I am in total shock. It might take a few days for it to sink in.

SuperChicken66

I am going to have to get assistance for rent and electric.

bibliophile

I am so sorry to hear about your situation and your brother's sudden passing. I can't imagine how hard this must be for you and all the things that must be done. I know just words don't mean much, but I didn't want you to think no one was hearing you. Please keep coming back here if you need people to talk to. The Chatroom is also always live, but usually has people in person from about 9PM Central on.

SuperChicken66

Thank you. It means so much to be able to communicate with others. I am disabled by Tremors and Anxiety caused by TBI (tramatic brain injury) and have chronic pain. My brother had been giving me a home and now it's falling apart. I talked to the landlord yesterday and he seems to be a nice guy but if I can't pay back rent I would have to leave (my brother as it turned out was 6000 dollars behind on rent). That is my issue at the moment. Getting rent paid so I have a home. But it doesn't look good and I may end up homeless and disabled. So that is my job now.

bibliophile

https://csn.cancer.org/discussion/comment/1724691#Comment_1724691

I hope that you are able to find some resources to help you with all those horribly stressful things coming on top of your loss of your brother. And I am glad that you are finding this a place where you feel comfortable sharing. Check out the chat one of these nights, if you have energy.

mak1970

https://csn.cancer.org/discussion/comment/1724676#Comment_1724676

https://csn.cancer.org/discussion/comment/1724675#Comment_1724675

I am so sorry and hope you are able to take time to grieve and process. Please ask for help if you need it.

SuperChicken66

After a week of anxious pacing and deep thought, I reached out to some old, OLD, friends for help. My biggest problem being transportation. I don't have a drivers license, so I need an electric scooter with a seat. My friends, 4 in total, gave me enough money for a scooter, and so I ordered one from amazon and will be here in 3-5 days. That makes it easy to go places and get assistance. Also I found a place to help with rent, they will pay the 6,000 dollars my brother was behind, and they pay 2 months ahead of time to give me time to find a place to move to. Now all I need is an apartment. If I can get all of this done, I will be so happy. Having anxiety issues is one thing, but it's totally different when there is a real reason to be anxious. I think I wore a path in my living room after pacing around so much. I feel like I walked helfway across the state. That's what I have so far. Thank you guys for listening. I will post an update in a few days.

SuperChicken66

I just realized that my first post was on sept. 28th and my brother passed away on the 29th. What a coincidence

bibliophile

https://csn.cancer.org/discussion/comment/1724778#Comment_1724778

I am so glad that you found the courage to reach out, that your friends were such a blessing, that you found rent assistance, and that things are moving in a positive direction! Thanks for the updates!