anal cancer

kittpugh

Dear Cinderthistle: I'm glad you finally have a set date for Chemo treatment to start!! Gosh it seems like its taken forever - the last date written down in calendar was July 31st which was consultation only I think? Not having had a "Port" for Chemo, I have nothing of value to share on the topic of keeping the site free from infection. Could you refresh my memory, how many weeks will the infusions of Chemo be? Its once per week, but for how many weeks? I couldn't believe it when I read Mak1970's post that she has had to wear her Port for all this time?? What on Earth?? Cancer is such an ugly monster to bring these brutal treatments upon us!!! My energy has now returned and my motivation for cleaning the house, which is good because I have set the course for purging 17 years of accumulated "stuff" in order to put the house on the market. I love this place, but my 72 year old body is no longer up to all the yard work which is endless!! I am thinking of moving to Windsor for several reasons, not the least of which is to be closer to medical help should the cancer creep back in, the clinic will only be a taxi ride away. The Ambassador Bridge into Detroil across the Detroit River is also a beautiful reason to move there and I've had so many possitive experiences even with complete strangers being so friendly! A happy place to be after all this misery. Prayers and Supplications to you and Mak1970. God is with us!!

cinderthistle

Hi mak1970——I'm having a hard time today and yesterday. Am anxious about the upcoming port procedure on Fri. I printed a copy of your above comment to take with me so I can ask about everything you mention. Thank you for all of it. I have trouble staying in the moment; keep looking ahead and wondering if I'll make it thru treatment, if I'll be able to take care of myself. Have scheduled an appt with the social worker for cancer patients (I forget what she's called). Hoping for a little support.

Kittpugh asked about my chemo treatments, but the truth is I don't know yet what to expect. I was given pages and pages of drug info, and the actual treatments begin sometime in mid-Sept. It all seems like so much, and then there's radiation, whenever that starts.

I do use "One day at a time," suggested by several comments. For me it's really about one moment at a time—-that's where I find some peace.

I don't have much more to say; just felt the need to post my feelings. You know, let a little light shine on them? Bye for now.

mak1970

Hello! Your feelings are 100% valid so please feel free to keep posting. I will be your cheerleader and want to keep you positive. You are stronger than you realize, which is good because you need to be now more than ever. You will make it through treatment; you have no choice because you must but there may be times it gets difficult. Not sure if you can sign up for the Road to Recovery (to get a ride to treatments)- this may help you out at least once in a while. If you are doing the 5fu, it is a pump they set you up and send it home with with you. Very awkward, definitely make sure you are stocked up and can stay home. I was lucky mine were scheduled over the weekend so I did not even have to go to radiation with it.
You should focus on the positive, worrying at this point is just a bad way to be. I watched a lot of tv, and not much else. Anyway, please feel free to keep posting.

kittpugh

Dear Cinderthistle: I wish I could help in supplying more info on what to expect, but the treatment is out of my realm of experience and Mak1970 is able to relate more than I. The thing that she said that I would echo is that your strength will come from the fact that you NEED to DO THIS, there is no choice, you can't go back. It's damn the torpedo, full steam ahead. And yes, lots of TV viewing, often dozing off, which is 100% a good thing as your body is hard at work repairing itself continually. I wish I knew your location, but I know that isn't an option. You are on a daily prayer time list with 2 gals that take prayer very seriously, one is my friend in Windsor together with her friend Joy, in the States. And me, of course. I can relate to your "moment by moment" and it is perfectly understandable, especially prior to actual treatment. Once treatment starts, the routines will help ease the panic that you now experience. One thing I can add, because I love my music, listening to it on my Classic iPod, I picked out a playlist that was particularly calming and especially at night going off to sleep, I would listen to my own brand of music therapy. [Content removed by CSN Support] God be with you Cinderthistle.

cinderthistle

mak1970 and kittpugh—-I just wanted to say Thank You to you both. Your comments give me courage and hope. So uplifting. You're always in my prayers. Will let you know how it goes.

cinderthistle

I got the chemo port! The procedure went very well; the medical professionals who took me thru it all were so good at what they did, worked so well together, and treated me with respect and care. They were wonderful, and I was impressed at how coordinated they were and still took time to be gentle with me. It took about 4 hrs from start to finish. Now I have somethings taped to my right upper chest and neck. Also instrux on how and when to remove them. No pain; doesn't get in the way of clothes.

Thank you for easing me thru the time leading up to it. I'm beginning to feel capable of going thru the whole cancer thing. Thank you for your prayers; mine are with you.

Next Thursday, PET scan. Bye for now!

kittpugh

Dear Cinderthistle: That is wonderful news and I can tell just from chosen words "worked so well together", "treated me with respect and care", "still took time to be gentle with me"……I believe is God at work in your life as it was in my days of treatment. It's like a silk glove! Hip, hip, horray!!! Like the sun coming out from behind a dark cloud. I'll have to Google an image of a Port as I really have no idea. And I'm so glad to learn that it isn't getting in the way of your clothing. Just a quick letter here. God continue to be with you.