Need Guidance on Where to Even Begin

seancarter

Hi Everyone, I am posting here to get advice from you. My mother, 72, just got diagnosed with stage 2 breast cancer on Friday. It was unexpected and we have no experience in handling something like this within our family. The whole process between coordinating and managing the complexity of the different specialists, treatments, services, prescriptions, etc. feels daunting. We have so many questions as to where to begin. Can you please see some of the below ones and let me know your advice?

-Second opinion: Is this advised and how quickly should we get one?

-What services are out there for treatment plans and other forms of support?

-Is there some sort of guide out there for us to know if we are asking the right questions at the different points of care?

-My mother loves her sense of independence and I know this will be a difficult time for her. She is a strong person and I don't want her to feel helpless in the process. Any advice on how to show her that she is still that strong person?

Thank you very much in advance

LovesPrimes

Hello, @seancarter

First and foremost, I'm so, so sorry for what you are facing. You are not alone and the people on these boards are amazing. I hope you'll hear from others soon but I'll start with just a couple things. When I was diagnosed in March of this year, a multidisciplinary team was quickly put together and I was deluged with appointments to meet with each person. It was overwhelming and distressing but I felt like I was in good hands and liked each member of the team; I felt like collectively they were wanting to give me solid information while respecting the decisions I was making. That's all to say I didn't feel compelled to get a second opinion but I knew I could have if I wanted to. My advice would be for your mother to meet with her "team" and go from there.

When I was in that stage, "between diagnosis and prognosis", I found a great resource, maybe on this site with examples of questions to ask. I will try to figure out where I found that and get back to you here.

Please know you are seen and cared about!

seancarter

https://csn.cancer.org/discussion/comment/1710146#Comment_1710146

Thank you for your kind message. I hope that you are doing well in your road to recovery.

LovesPrimes

https://www.nccn.org/patients/guidelines/content/PDF/breast-invasive-patient.pdf

@seancarter Let me know if this link doesn't work and I will try another way. This has lots of example questions to ask:

https://www.nccn.org/patients/guidelines/content/PDF/breast-invasive-patient.pdf