I have just found you folks!

Thomas2112

My name is Thomas, and I had a complete Laryngectomy a yr and a half ago

Now retired singer/ songwriter. I still play alot of Guitar, its been my life since I was very little.

Since the operation I have watched friends and family just simply go away. It's been heartbreaking. So today I found you folks and I am hoping and praying that maybe I can connect with someone and just have someone to talk to and share bad days etc.

I am on fb as Thomas McConville, Huntington Beach.

I hope someone reaches out this loneliness is just almost unbearable

Thank you for taking the time to read this.

Please reach back out

Happy 4th, Everyone!!!!!

wbcgaruss

Hello Thomas, and welcome to the CSN H&N forum/discussion board.

I am so glad you made it through your laryngectomy and are apparently doing well a year and a half out from it.

There was a fellow on here that had a total laryngectomy like you and he ran a support group and was always ready to help anyone. A very positive guy, like you. Unfortunately, he passed away in November of 2021. But the good news is you can search his past posts on here. Here is a link to his profile page. https://csn.cancer.org/profile/discussions/wmc

Bill was from Visalia, California

Also, the good news is Bill or wmc as he was known on here shared information and I have some I keep to help others like you. I know Bill always mentioned a site called WebWhispers a site for laryngectomees.

WebWhispers--

https://webwhispers.org/

WebWhispers was started in 1996 for those who had questions about larynx cancer treatments, surgery, recovery, and what life is like after laryngectomy surgery. We are now the largest support group for individual laryngectomee survivors of larynx and other throat cancers. We offer advice from those who have been there and education at the time it is needed. Our membership is composed of patients, caregivers, medical professionals and suppliers. Come join us in order to use our full facilities. It’s free to join and no dues to pay.

Also, Bill had a YouTube channel and it is still available and may be helpful to you--

https://www.youtube.com/%40wmcross51/videos

Believe me Thomas I know it's tough going through this H&N treatment and coming out the other side many times working up a new pathway to travel. Just don't hold back and restrict yourself, try anything and reach out to people and you will get some friends eventually and they will be good ones.

Also, I am usually around you can feel free to private message me if you need someone to talk to. After all, we are all in the same general boat together with many of us having speech, swallowing, breathing issues, etc.

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I am so sorry your friends and family have faded away from you but it is a common occurrence with cancer and it seems more so with Head and Neck Cancer. People have trouble dealing with it and maybe it scares them a little. Here's the good news if you have a friend that stayed and is your supporter they are the gold to keep.

How does cancer affect friendships?

Cancer can change many things in your life, including your friendships. You will probably notice that some friends stop spending as much time with you. Others might become even closer. You might also make new friends during your cancer treatment.

Here is a video that may help with people talking about post treatment-Lost in Transition

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YhuqWM3dNAw

Our motto on here is NEGU (Never Ever Give Up) and that goes for existing friends and if you need to find some new friends then keep moving forward and don't stop and never give up.

Whatever you do Thomas keep active and friendly and things will come your way. And Never Ever Give Up.

Take Care, God Bless-Russ

Hold on whatever you do--

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3fwYG32g5mo

TonyB2023

Hello Thomas,

I too was a singer/guitar player. I wrote a couple of decent songs, but wouldn't call myself a writer.

The radiotherapy I had ruined my voice. When I sit here, playing alone, I realize I was a better singer than guitarist. I have a rough, garbled voice now, so people don't seem to want to talk to me very long. I moved back to TN after my throat cancer treatment, but the folks I used to play with here have moved on and don't get together anymore and I have yet to play with anyone else.

I continue playing, but now it's all instrumentals and learning things I neglected to learn.

I hope you can find some musicians that aren't put off by your condition and welcome you as a valuable player!

Stay positive!

Tony