Have you been ghosted?

ChristineC

I feel like I have lost so many people since I told them about my cancer diagnosis. Friends and family both. I wish I could go back in time and not even tell them. It’s so painful to process that they haven’t even texted me a “how are you doing”. Cancer without any support is really horrible. Thanks for reading.

Miranda7

I am so sorry this has been your experience!!! it should definitely be the opposite. However, I do try to remember what it was like before my diagnosis. I knew absolutely nothing about cancer and what people go through. So try to open up and tell them what you’re going through. And also it’s super important to tell them what you need help with. Many people want to help but they do not know what to say or what to do. So it might not be that, I don’t want to help or it that they don’t care. It simply might be. They are at a loss and feel helpless or uncomfortable. So open up to the people you care about the most and I am sure they will be there for you. 🩷🩷🩵🩵🩵🩵🙏🏽🩷🙏🏽🩵

P1CancerSurvivor

Do not burden yourself for the actions of others. Please seek out your local non-profits for assistance and guidance. Inquire with your doctor or local cancer center for support and social groups. You DO have the mental and physical strength to fight your cancer. I believe in you and you're not alone. You can also reach out to other cancer patience, doctors and nurses. Fellow colleagues, current and past. Join online groups such as this one and others. Keep a journal can also assist as well. You can do this.

andstal

It's a real thing called "Cancer Ghosting". I'm dealing with it currently. Both family and friends are gone. Oh, and don't get me started on when they say, "If you need anything, just ask." Total BS. When you do ask for help, it can't be something where they have to go out of their way! I'm busy that day, or I just got my nails done so I can't do that! Always some BS story. I'm done pulling teeth trying to get help.

I heard some BS one day saying cancer is what you have and not who you are. Obvious from someone who doesn't have cancer or other disease that takes over your life. So yes, when family or friends do call, yes you will talk a lot about your cancer. If they are truly genuine, they will let you talk about it. But many don't want to hear about it and simply ghost you.

ephe

this happened to me. My family - mother and brother - did this and it’s pretty much the worst thing to come out of cancer.

I got the 5 year clear late last year (just reread this and it sounds like I’m suddenly rapping to you! Not intentional ! 😹) but the effects of being ghosted are sometimes so painful I feel like I’ve been physically punched. I feel … like an alien. Unlovable and strange.

Honestly, we were never close, so I think cancer just put a magnifying glass to it - but it hurts because I’ve only ever wanted to be loved by them. Ridiculously, I hoped cancer might bring us together - I see how stupid that is, but that’s how I felt at the time.

I think ghosting will be something that takes a long time to recover from. I haven’t really met many people who also experienced this and in my country the support groups don’t seem to have many accounts of this kind of thing.

waken420bacon

I feel what your saying a lot, I am experiencing this as well, after I got diagnosed and went through my surgeries and chemo it felt like I lost everyone.