breast cancer

carebear462023

I had a mactomey of my left breast I was devastated I am still struggling with how I look and I am thinking about having the reconstive surgery but really scared need advice and help

Narisha23

https://csn.cancer.org/discussion/326341/breast-cancer

Hi, I'm going through treatment now, I'm no my third, I need 12 in total. I can relate to how you feel eventhough I haven't had the surgery yet, I feel like I don't know who I am anymore, like I've lost myself. I don't see me in the mirror. Usually they do reconstructive surgery at the same according to a breast surgeon I spoke with, so that the patient wakes up with breast to avoid this feeling . What did your breast surgeon recommend? Not knowing anything in this situation is scary, guidance is needed and I feel its not given. I hope my reply helped you a little. Since I found out I have been seeking some kind of support or guidance and doesn't seem to be any or enough. Doctors who are treating this don't understand our mental state .

melitza14

https://csn.cancer.org/discussion/326341/breast-cancer

I had a double mastectomy last year and this upcoming Monday I will have my tissue expanders removed and replaced with belly fat. I have friends that have done reconstruction immediately and delayed. They seem to be doing well overall. What is it you're afraid of in regards to reconstruction?

Widdershins3

I had a double mastectomy years ago and opted for reconstruction. Mine took longer than usual to do, since my surgeon had a commitment for the 6 months or so following the implantation of the tissue expanders. But I wanted him to complete the process, so I just lived with the expanders in place. When he got back, he put the silicone forms in and I healed pretty fast, considering I was in my 60's then.

Most of the other women I've connected with at chemo appts. had a very similar process, but without the long wait to complete it. I didn't hear any horror stories at all, even though all sorts of reconstructions had been done. It was just a matter of taking care of ourselves and not overdoing it.

If your anxiety continues, I would really ask your oncologist for xanax or another anti-anxiety drug to get you through the process. I hate to think of you worrying yourself sick when you've already got so much on your plate. It's not weakness to ask for help when dealing with cancer-related surgeries/decisions and I'm sure your doctors will understand. If you need to, you could ask for a palliative care doctor to consult with--their whole reason for being is to help you to cope and not be stressed or feel pressured in any way.

I wish you luck--it's been a while since you posted, but if you're still having trouble coping, please do ask for help. Reconstruction doesn't need to be a major source of trauma and once it's done you'll likely feel much more like your old self.

Hers2pCS

https://csn.cancer.org/discussion/comment/1704535#Comment_1704535

So true. I had a chemos, a left breast and lymph nodes removed under my arm-which caused lymphedema fluid to go into my left arm. Movement was limited. I did radiation, and I go to Physical Rehabilitation to move lymphatic fluid. I have 7 more 1/2 chemo’s to go. The doctors don’t understand completely how we feel. They don’t have Cancer.

I feel the reason the Oncology doctor, the Surgeon, the Radiologist, and the Physicians don’t tell us everything we have to go through in detail it will overwhelm us. I felt they kept adding and adding more treatments to my list. I’m hopefully done 10/23. It wouldn’t surprise me if they added one more thing. ✌🏽

wandastaley

I am just starting the journey,I am mad at everything,I cry all the time.Im scared to death,I thought I just had a fatty cyst or a plugged gland to have them come in and tell me I have infiltrating lobular carcenoma.It doesn't run in my family,I had 7 kids ,10 grandkids,I am 61 I am retired,I have two sons who are disabled ,my husband as well.I handle all the household stuff for our family,I dont know who is going to help me or how.I feel like a ugly boob and that medical people treat you like a cancerous boob instead of a person They are nice but their focus is your breast not you.I have acute PTSD which is triggered every single time I go to do a visit or treatment normally Im nice but now I have none.

Widdershins3

https://csn.cancer.org/discussion/comment/1707148#Comment_1707148

I'm posting again just because I'd really love to see an update from you. My prayer for you is that the pain you're feeling is a stage of grief--an acute one--and that you'll find help and be able to move past it. I was in my 60s when my breast cancer was found and it took a while for me to really come to terms with what it meant, so I truly feel for you.

Our stage of life can turn out to be a lot busier with more commitments than we ever expected. That makes asking for help a vital thing to learn to do. I was really surprised at how much people I knew wanted to help me out, but didn't know what would be acceptable to offer or how to offer to do it without offending me. I was very independent and unused to asking for help, so I'm still learning, but I'm constantly amazed at the resources out there--people and charities truly want to help out. Many churches will help to connect you to all sorts of aid, too, as well as offering fellowship and prayers. I'm not conventionally religious and I actually envy my cancer patient friends who are. But I do have church groups praying for me, which is something I never thought I'd see. My wonderful Samoan yard guy turned out to be a minister in his community and now his little congregation prays for me. I'm so grateful.

And you are NOT an "ugly boob"!!! NOT. You are a very strong and beautiful woman who's facing a helluva challenge. And you have so much company. Come back and use the resources here--other survivors fighting the same battle who will gladly share their experiences to help you navigate this new challenge. I wish you many hugs and the passing of this tough time. You can do this.