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V4me2
V4me2 Member Posts: 3 Member
edited July 2022 in Uterine/Endometrial Cancer #1

Hi,

I'm a year out from my diagnosis (got the call on my 50th birthday). I was not expecting endometrial cancer having just gone through diverticulitis/bowel perforation. Luckily it was 1A and so far I've just needed a radical hysterectomy. I'm finding myself with a lot of anger a few months out, not at getting sick so much, but at finding how crap my support network is after years of people pleasing. I'm not really sure what to do with that, but I'm wondering how other single childless women have coped when "help" runs for the hills.

Thanks for being here and a resource!

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  • ConnieSW
    ConnieSW Member Posts: 1,678 Member
    #2
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    I’m sorry that happened to you. We can’t provide physical help but can offer lots of moral support and education. There are lots of kind ladies here. I’ve been hanging out for 10 years.

  • thatblondegirl
    thatblondegirl Member Posts: 385 Member
    #3
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    Hi

    I’m sorry you’re experiencing those things. I’m glad you’re health is OK!

    The first word that came to my mind after reading your post was: Expectations. One of my favorite sayings is, “The secret to happiness is low expectations.” And I don’t mean that in the negative way that you might think! It’s more about YOU than it is about others. If you don’t expect things from people, you can’t be disappointed. It’s not right at all that you have done so much for others and they haven’t been there for you.

    It didn’t happen to me, but I’ve heard others with similar problems and they reached the conclusion that it has to do with people not being able to handle the topic of cancer, like they run the other way. I’m a lot older than you are, but I’ve found myself in a place where I don’t have a lot of friends anymore. Cancer and the pandemic are partly to blame, but the rest of it’s me. I’m content to be home. I’m very lucky to have had a wonderful husband to get me through my cancer.

    We’re here for you.

    ❤️, A

  • V4me2
    V4me2 Member Posts: 3 Member
    #4
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    Thanks, I appreciate the good wishes! I think my expectations were pretty low, but I couldn't get a ride to/from the hospital after surgery (I drove myself, but the parking adds up since I was there two weeks), to the doctor follow-ups/testing while still on narcotics, things like that. They don't let you drive or use a cab for some of that, so I was hoping someone might know of other resources.

  • CSNSupportTeam
    CSNSupportTeam admin Posts: 201
    #5
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    Hi V4me2,

    I'm glad you joined CSN! I know the costs of transportation and cancer can be very high! We would be happy to help look for resources that may offer some relief. Please reach out to us at ACS's National Cancer Information Center. You can call our toll-free number, 1.800.227.2345, where Cancer Information Specialists are available around the clock every day of the week to speak with you. You can also utilize the Live Chat feature Monday through Friday between 7am-6:30pm CST on www.cancer.org.


    Best regards, 


    Ken

    CSN Support Team

  • NoTimeForCancer
    NoTimeForCancer Member Posts: 3,371 Member
    #6
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    https://csn.cancer.org/discussion/comment/1697549#Comment_1697549

    Agree with you, Connie. The Uterine board has been wonderful support for many patients over the years. You will always find a kind ear and virtual shoulder to lean on.

  • cmb
    cmb Member Posts: 1,001 Member
    #7
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    I hope that CSN’s response will provide you with an option for transportation in the future. I’m sure it was very discouraging that it was so difficult for you without that support during treatment.

    While my sister and my good friend get me to/from surgery and chemo treatments, I was well enough to drive myself to the radiation session later. But I’m also single without children and do occasionally worry about the future. I’m the youngest of my siblings and, despite cancer and some other health issues, I’m actually the healthiest of all of us. And all my nieces and nephews are scattered across the country and overseas, so I don’t expect to have family close by as I age. It’s certainly something I think about for the future.

    Like thatblondgirl, my network of friends has diminished as I’ve gotten older. Some have moved away and I’ve drifted apart from others as our life circumstances have changed. When I was working, I traveled all the time, making it hard to sustain new friendships. But now that I’m mostly retired, I’m hoping to change that. I’ve done volunteer work with an animal rescue organization for many years, so to build on some of those relationships more than I was able to do in the past. 

  • V4me2
    V4me2 Member Posts: 3 Member
    #8
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    https://csn.cancer.org/discussion/comment/1697616#Comment_1697616

    Thank you, I appreciate the help and empathy!

  • thatblondegirl
    thatblondegirl Member Posts: 385 Member
    #9
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    I hope CSN’s suggestions will bring you some help if you need it again. I’m so sorry you couldn’t even get help with even the smallest of tasks…like a ride to the hospital.

    Hope you’re having a nice weekend.

    ❤️, A

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