Remission Depression?

Deemaries Member Posts: 3

Maybe someone can help me withthis. My husband has been in remission from tongue cancer for 2 years now.  His mouth hurts terribly and he says his whole body hurts terribly. All of his scans show he is cancer free and the doc said he only has a 20 percent chance of the cancer coming back at this point.  The thing is.... he tells me he is perfectly happy to sit in the house, never go anywhere, just sleep and watch tv.  I do everything alone. When I have persuaded him to go out I can tell he just wants to be home, in his recliner or his bed and he is perfectly happy there. Many times we have discussed this and I just do not understand the non motivation to see what is going on in the outside world. How can aperson just stay inside for months at a time, not caring what is going on around them?  I know he is probably depressed. But maybe he is in that much pain that he just has no motivation.  He is 66. I am respecting what he wants to do... but it is so hard to live life "alone".  And if I don't prepare him something to eat, somtimes he doesn't eat.  He does nothing... I do it all... he will take out the garbage if I nag him... but that lasts one or 2 weeks and then that's over. That's how it is around here. He just has no motivation to be any better. But maybe he is in too much pain to feel like doing anything. I have chronic fatigue syndrome, fybromyalgia, and I try to push through the pain everyday and walk, he doesn't... and he doesn't care about getting any better.  He is very afraid they are going to yank his pain pills from him too. His body is in a lot of pain. He has burning mouth syndrome, and has a hard time eating. Thank You for any insight you can give me on this.  I don't know if he has given up on life, or what is going on.