The "fun" is set to begin
Well I've had every test they can give you, talked to every doctor on earth and played phone tag with a million nurses at this point. There is nothing left to do but begin the treatment. They gave me an MRI and officially staged the cancer as stage three. Today I went to be "fitted" for their radiation machine and now have "X's" drawn on embarassing parts of my body. Wednesday I begin my regime of daily chemo pills and radiation. This is the last thing on earth I want to do but if I want to live I have to. I'm a little nervous as cancer runs very high in my family and I have watched my parents and grandparents go for treatment and saw what it did to them. Not to be morbid but none of them survived. My mother had the same cancer I do. She was diaagnosed in late 1990, started treatment in early 1991 and the cancer was back by 1994. she died in 1997. I'm not giving up but the radiologist made me sign a paper stating that I know that there is no cure for cancer.
One month ago I was living a regular life while wating for a colonoscapy that my doctor said would likely come back negative. Today I sit in various wating rooms in a part of the hosptial reserved for cancer treatment. If I survive this I will never again complain over a flat tire or having to work late or any of a number of other things I used to.
Christy
Comments
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its like a deep dive in a dark well
and all you have is their best and most precise guess that you will land safely. I had a difficult but simple life 24 days ago. I was content. Those days are long gone. Its like just suddening picking up all your belongings and on a dime moving to another country. A entirely new, painful life. Just left a cardiologist appointment, and have a colonoscopy/biospy tomorrow. All while continuing to try to work a normal schedule, run errands, pay bills.
I wish you the very best. You should take solace at the fact that cancer treatments today are far better than they were in the 90's. And I think the chemo pills have less jarring side effects. So stay positive on your leap of faith. This is just a chapter in your journey, there a lot more to be written.
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Cancer Ward
Actually, I kind of like the segregated cancer units, they seem to treat the customers (er, patients) a bit better. Cancer changes your perspective, so that things that formerly bothered you are small things. And even if things look grim, there are a lot of days and a lot of years ahead of you. You are embarking on a course of treatment that will likely give you a high chance of a normal life and a normal life span. As the bumper stickers say, take it "one day at a time." But never forget to watch the sun rise and set, to hear the birds in the trees, to watch the children playing, and to realize that mortality is necessary to have life.
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I spent 3 weeks in the cancer
I spent 3 weeks in the cancer ward in Vancouver BC and was treated exceptionally well. Had to go back in a regular hospital and again had very little care. They are to busy.
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