Diagnosed with stage IVB Endometrial cancer

LadyMox

Doing Well & Getting Inpatient

Physically I am good 9 days before my 3rd chemo. Feel normal with no pain. While I am glad my CA-125 numbers are going down I am finding myself inpatient to not only get the CTscan hopefully after my 3rd chemo but for the surgery to get this tumor out of me; Mainly because I want to know all the final pathology. Or maybe I am holding out a unlikely hope that when they look at everything I will be a lesser stage then they thought, probably the best I can hope for is stage 3 but even that is unlikely.

Emotionally is more hit and miss; Some days I feel like there is hope, like when I got a good raise at work but other days all I can see is my upcoming death even though I feel fine now. I fear that my husband will have to watch me deteriote over the next months or short years. I try to be hopeful that the chemo and surgery will get me into remission, who knows for how long but I can hope for remission.  I have seen numerous ladies with my stage online get into remission for a time, I am trying to hope I can be one of them.

 

CheeseQueen57

LadyMox said:

Doing Well & Getting Inpatient

Physically I am good 9 days before my 3rd chemo. Feel normal with no pain. While I am glad my CA-125 numbers are going down I am finding myself inpatient to not only get the CTscan hopefully after my 3rd chemo but for the surgery to get this tumor out of me; Mainly because I want to know all the final pathology. Or maybe I am holding out a unlikely hope that when they look at everything I will be a lesser stage then they thought, probably the best I can hope for is stage 3 but even that is unlikely.

Emotionally is more hit and miss; Some days I feel like there is hope, like when I got a good raise at work but other days all I can see is my upcoming death even though I feel fine now. I fear that my husband will have to watch me deteriote over the next months or short years. I try to be hopeful that the chemo and surgery will get me into remission, who knows for how long but I can hope for remission.  I have seen numerous ladies with my stage online get into remission for a time, I am trying to hope I can be one of them.

 

Maybe some comfort

Check out my posting:

https://csn.cancer.org/node/316993

NoTimeForCancer

LadyMox, it is overwhelming,

LadyMox, it is overwhelming, and I don't know when that goes away.  Just try to take a breath, and if you need, get an anti-anxiety med.  Similarly, the CQ post is awesome.  I won't tell you to "stay positive", because this is a journey that takes us down many different paths.  If it helps, please know that you are not alone. 

Northwoodsgirl

LadyMox Emotional Ups and Down

LadyMox, I am so glad you are doing OK with the chemo.

Oh yes, the emotional rollercoaster is quite an experience! Please know dear one that you will get through the mixed emotions. It is amazing how our minds can waiver from “I can do this “ to “I am sure my life is going to be cut short by this cancer“.

All anyone has is this very moment...and that is something that is so difficult for us mear mortals to comprehend. Try to practice “mindfulness” when your mind goes to that dark place. Accept the emotions and fear for what they are. Those emotions will get better with time. You are going through anticipatory grief about the uncertainties. Please remember you are not alone and we are here for you...

((Hug))

Lori

pato58

LadyMox

Sending you positive vibes and good wishes.
Cyber Hugs too!

Armywife

There IS hope!

All of us here are living proof that there's hope!  You've got some tough gals for company on this ride, girl.  You're going to be ok.  My mind went all those places too - I bet everyone here will say the same.  And here we are - and sometimes I feel like the whole experience was a bad dream - but I woke up!  One day at a time - you're already making progress.  Stay the course.

janaes

LadyMox

LadyMox

I havent chimed in with you yet but have been reading your posts. I just wanted to let you know i was also 42 when i rwcieved my uterine cancer diagnosis. Your not alone in that. Im 46 now. Its hard when we are so young but like the other have said you can beat this darn cancer. It sounds like you are doing great. All your feelings are normal. Dont be hard on yourself. Know you are going theough a hard thing and its not easy. I wish you the best as you go forward with all this.

Janae

LadyMox

Thanks all. Physcially I feel

Thanks all. Physcially I feel pretty good and have 6 days to my third chemo, I am still trying hard to not freak emotionally. I switch from "I am going to beat this!" to "I will be dead in a 2 years!" pretty often. I try to split the difference and amtrying to focus on "I am going to get into remission, even if I don't know for how long!"

I got some good news, The 3.2 liters of ascites fluid I had extracted back on 8/20 from the paracentesis was tested negative for malignancy. I decided to ask my doctor, in some ways I was afraid to know but I am glad I finally asked.  While I still have a 5 inch tumor in my abdomen over/near my right ovary (last we checked, hopefully smaller with chemo), I feel better knowing at least the fluid itself was not maligant and getting everywhere.

pato58

LadyMox said:

Thanks all. Physcially I feel

Thanks all. Physcially I feel pretty good and have 6 days to my third chemo, I am still trying hard to not freak emotionally. I switch from "I am going to beat this!" to "I will be dead in a 2 years!" pretty often. I try to split the difference and amtrying to focus on "I am going to get into remission, even if I don't know for how long!"

I got some good news, The 3.2 liters of ascites fluid I had extracted back on 8/20 from the paracentesis was tested negative for malignancy. I decided to ask my doctor, in some ways I was afraid to know but I am glad I finally asked.  While I still have a 5 inch tumor in my abdomen over/near my right ovary (last we checked, hopefully smaller with chemo), I feel better knowing at least the fluid itself was not maligant and getting everywhere.

LadyMox

So relieved to hear about the ascites fluid!

I have a question, without surgery, how can they be sure about the stage of the cancer?
Are you taking any anxiety medicine in a small dose to help you deal with all this?
I take a small dose of Ativan, as needed, and when I feel overwhelmed, it really helps.
Thinking of you my dear!

LadyMox

pato58 said:

LadyMox

So relieved to hear about the ascites fluid!

I have a question, without surgery, how can they be sure about the stage of the cancer?
Are you taking any anxiety medicine in a small dose to help you deal with all this?
I take a small dose of Ativan, as needed, and when I feel overwhelmed, it really helps.
Thinking of you my dear!

They biopsyed the mass near

They biopsyed the mass near my ovary and my endometrial lining, but overall they are taking an educated guess.  Last they checked I had a huge tumor near my right ovary  (hopefully shrinking with chemo to make surgery easier)  that was something like 5x5x4 inches filling my lower adbomen near my ovaries. As far as they could tell oddly enough didn't spread to past that but who knows what they will find. I won't really know till surgery. I don't think it's anything isn't removal by surgery but still terriying. Still odd that it is the only visible obvious tumor when it's Endometrial cancer.

I had an appointment to see my primary doctor about anti aniexty meds but he is having surgery himself and the appointment got moved to a few weeks from now.

NoTimeForCancer

LadyMox, my gyn onc offered

LadyMox, my gyn onc offered me anti-aniety meds - they get the reactions women have.  Have you thought about asking them?  

LadyMox

NoTimeForCancer said:

LadyMox, my gyn onc offered

LadyMox, my gyn onc offered me anti-aniety meds - they get the reactions women have.  Have you thought about asking them?  

I haven't thought of asking

I haven't thought of asking them because they always seem so busy to talk to at all. My primary generally more approachable.

LadyMox

I'm at chemo #3 waiting for

I'm at chemo #3 waiting for it to start. My CA125 number is now 18. They want to wait till after chemo 4 for imaging in hopes the tumor shrinks enough that they won't have to do open surgery and can do a less invasive one.

Lasha12

I think UPSC and serous carcinoma are two different cancers. UPSC being the more aggressive. I have it too :)