Worried

Thyresa11

My father has colon cancer stage IV. He was diagnosed in October 2016 after a complete bowel obstruction. He had an irreversible colostomy, then 2 months of radiation, mon-fri, then biweekly folfox February - July. This past April he was told the cancer had spread to his left lung, a 4cm mass. He started avastin folfox combo every other week. Oncologist said there is no "cure" and that we can just shrink the lung tumor. 

I am planning to get married soon, to make sure my father can make it. Is it selfish to want him there, to be planning a wedding, and what can I do to offer him support? Im an only child and I am very attached to him. He really is the perfect father and I feel distraught at what I can do.

Trubrit

Don't feel guilty

Plan yourself a beautiful wedding, and plan on having your dad there, even if he can't make it in the end. 

If your dad does come to your wedding, he will be the happiest father in the world. 

This is your special day. Your fiance's special day and it will be your dad's special day. 

There are several folks here on the forum who are at the stage your dad is at. No cure, as such, but control of their tumours through ongoing chemo. Some (like Phil) have been doing this for many years.  Your dad could have many years ahead, also. 

Visit the fourm and we will help you as you travel this path with your dad. 

Congratulations on your upcoming nuputals. 

Tru

SandiaBuddy

Open and honest

My only recommendation would to have open and honest conversations with your father about all of your feelings and concerns.  He, more than anyone else, can provide you with the answers and reassurance you are looking for.