Okay . . . so we have a situation that arose this past Saturday night that has to do with a Staph infection.
At about 9:50 Saturday night, just getting ready for bed, my husband (whom I love more than I can possibly describe, as you all know by now) . . . told me that he had a fever of 101.1, obviously over the 100.4 threshhold limit the cancer care clinic warned us about. Most nights, Terry runs a fever . . . usually, between 99. 4 to 99.7 (an occasional 100.0 or so) . . . so we've been checking it every night before bed. So, when he passed that threshhold, we called the clinic . . . who patched us through to the oncologist on call. They told us to drive to the ER, which we did. They did a chest X-ray, drew blood and ran two blood cultures (which of course had to have time to "grow", riight?). They sent us home because shortly after we were there, his temp went back down to 99.0. All his labs (minus the usual abnormalities for someone getting chemo), looked fine . . . chalked it up to "odd", I'm guessing.
So, this morning at 12:30 a.m., someone from the ER left me a VM which I didn't get until early this morning. They said that one of his cultures was positive for a bacteria that sometimes was due to a "contaminant" or something more. This person said that if Terry wasn't feeling "ill", we didn't need to return to the ER, but that we should call the oncology clinic, which I did when they opened, who said we needed to get right to the ER, as the bacteria was due to a staph infection and that it could spread very quickly, as he would have to be admitted to the hospital for IV antibiotics.
So, being the diligent caregiver that I am, I called the dispatcher for the bus service (he drives City bus) and told him to have Terry call me right away. I was at work, so I told my co-workers and my supervisor but Terry wasn't calling me back; so, I called them back and they said they had given him my message; yet, I hadn't heard from him. They told me he wanted to "get to his next time point".
Thus, the first reason for the "Grrrrrr" title of my post.
He ended up calling me back a few minutes later and I told him that I was leaving work after I hung up with him and heading to the house, as he would have to leave his car in the garage and we would then head to the ER. That was all at 9:15 a.m.
Guess where I am, as I'm writing this . . . . I am sitting here, staring at my computer screen, pounding these words into my keyboard and still no Terry. It was 10:00 and still no Terry. We live half an hour away. I called the bus company back to find out where, in all this, was my husband. They told me that he never asked for a relief driver, so I told them that he was supposed to have done that as he had to report to the ER. So, I tried calling him twice and sent him a text message. On my third try . . . he said, "Oh, I didn't think I had to come home right away" and then proceeded to argue with me that he only had 15 more minutes on his morning piece, so he was going to finish it up and then head home.
Thus, the 2nd reason for my Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr title to this message.
I left work at 9:15, loaded up our emergency bag and packed up the car when I got here . . . 10:40 and still no Terry.
As I said, I love my husband more than anyone in this world and would do anything for him. I have done "anything" for him, 10 times over; but this sort of "guy" stuff is flipping ridiculous. Are most of you, dealing with cancer, like this????? Honestly, what would it take for anyone like my Terry, of the male gender, to realize the sort of stress your "manliness" causes those of my gender, particularly one has to resort to computer connections to gain understanding and respect for all the crap I've done and am expected to do. He hears what he wants to hear and, in doing all that, his "tuning me out" causes me so much undue stress.
As I just wrote that last sentence, the on-call oncologist called me and reiterated that it would be best for us to get to the ER. I would imagine they're expecting us to have been there by now. I realize this isn't going to kill him in an hour . . . but, for God's sake . . . having me rush around and go through all of this, this morning and he sitting in that driver's seat of that stupid bus "finishing up his morning piece" is somewhat amusing; yet troubling that he could be so dismissive of what he was told and twisted it into the scenario he probably cooked up in that head of his because it was easier for HIM and exactly what he intended to do without any consideration for what I had to do to get to the house and prepare for what they're thinking will be an overnight hospital stay to knock this "fing" out of him before it has a chance to go "full-blown".
Okay . . . . I'm done . . . . (I THINK) . . . .
I JUST had to vent . . . sitting here waiting for my wonderful, but stubborn husband to drive that Jeep of his into our garage, so I can then drive him yet again to the ER . . . our "home away from home" and miss a day's work (which I can't really afford to do, yet will because of our "special" love.
Thought you gals out there would find this rant better than a soap opera this morning or that novel you're reading; as I trust most of you have figured out by now that I think the world revolves around me and my issues.
I'm mostly just slightly "ticked off" at him . . . . But, seriously, I would like to know what most of you would have done. This will be another one of those "precious" moments we laugh about when it's all over but, right now, I AM PISSED!
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