Waiting is the hardest part

TaliaLovesLife

Hi there, I'm new here. First, Congratulations to everyone who has survived cancer, prayers for those who are going through it, and Love to all. We are WARRIORS!

I survived Breast cancer in 2015. I now have a 6.6 cm mass on my left ovary that is undetermined. I have been really sick for over two months, and I have chronic and sometimes debilitating pelvic pain from stage lV Endometriosis. Despite this, I feel relatively happy and thankful. Whatever it is, I will kick its a#%, with God before me in the battle. 

I am trying to wait for an appt with a new ob/GYN (Dec 12), to review pelvic ultrasounds and CT scans I received on one of my numerous trips to the ER... Then we will make a plan. I am trying to face the unknown, but I just want to know. I want to have a plan. Don't we all? 

I sonetimes have the gift of medical intuition, and i never know when/where it will manifest. I had a series of dreams that told me something was wrong, months before I developed symptoms of Paget's Breast cancer. I don't have kids, but I have a rescue dog named Luna and she means the whole world to me. I was very hesitant to share, because I believe in the power of words and thought, and I don't want to give energy to talking about cancer... But after all, this is a safe place where I can be truthful and I know some of you will understand and relate. 

I don't know what my question is... I know that the question is more important than the answer.. Only now I'm start to cry, so I guess I'm looking for support, a plan, and for anyone who has been in a similar situation. I think it's human nature to imagine the worst, when we are sick, and well... When we have a yet to be determined mass, and a history of cancer, advanced Endo.... Ugh I've gotta stop. It's late and as my mom says, "Morning is wiser than night"... So off to bed I go, cuddling with my real medicine, my Luna Bear.

I imagine the doctor will send me for labs with cancer markers... And then see. Surgery seems imminent, though a surgeon attempted-and failed- to remove the growth in 2015.i could have been more proactive, but now pain is the great motivator.

i am a recovering addict --75 days clean and sober today--and I resisted any sort of pain meds beyond ibuprofen... Until now. I'm on ibuprofen and a low dose of Tramadol, which takes it down to a dull roar. I'll take it!

Thank you for reading... Can anyone relate?

 

NoTimeForCancer

Talia, first off CONGRATS on

Talia, first off CONGRATS on 75 days clean and sober!!  That is awesome and I am sure it is a day at a time.  Everything you wrote sure makes sense - the questions, the fear, the waiting...I think the ladies can all relate.

I am a visitor from the Uterine board, we gyn girls stick together, and sometimes it can be a little quiet here on the Ovarian board, but others do check in.  Please let us know how the 12th goes but you sound like you have a good plan to date. 

Tethys41

Yes, I can

I can relate in many ways.  I had endometriosis, diagnosed 10 years prior to the cancer diagnosis.  I too had a dog that I am convinced saved my life during all of this. 

Waiting is often the hardest part, but cancer taught me not to worry until I knew I had something to worry about.  I also forbid my doctor to talk about survival or statistics at my very first visit with him, and he honored my wishes, thankfully, because the news was not good. 

Your gyn/onc will guide you to find out what is going on.  Hopefully, it is just endometriosis.  If not, you will find a way through this and your intuition will guide you.  Mine did. 

I opted to follow an integrative approach and, almost 9 years later, am healthier than I was for decades prior to my diagnosis.  Making your body healthy is your best defense now, and if this turns out to be cancer, it also helps during and after treatment. 

The bad news my doctor did not share with me was that I was not going to acheive remission and I was not going to live for a year.  My brother told me he shared this information with him after my surgery.  Well, I proved him wrong.  You can do this.

AMoore16

CONGRATS on your sobriety!!!!

CONGRATS on your sobriety!!!!!!! Girl, if you can do that, you can do anything!!!! Hold your head high warrior whatever comes your way you can overcome.