New member-very afraid

worrywort87

Hello, I'll get straight to the point. I am a 30-year-old obese male. I suffer from anxiety and panic disorder. I've had fears of having colon cancer for several years now on and off whenever I notice blood in my stool. I was having urgency and diarrhea a few weeks after changing my diet. I wasn't sure if the diet change was the reason so I went to the emergency room and then to my primary care physician after that. Tests I've had recently are as follows: normal urinalysis, high cholesterol and low vitamin D but otherwise normal blood test (I was not anemic), abdominal x-ray that showed a lot of gas but otherwise normal, an abdominal CT scan with contrast that showed a mild fatty liver but otherwise was normal, a normal bacteria and parasite stool test (that I do not believe checked for blood). When I was collecting the stool test sample at the beginning of last August I saw that there was blood on my stool. I kept a fecal immunochemical test in my bathroom drawer and used it to confirm that it was indeed blood that I was seeing. A month passed and the diarrhea has stopped (after reverting the change of diet that I assumed caused it in the first place) and the urgency to defecate has improved but is still somewhat there. Most concerning, however, is that my last three bowel movements have had blood on them. The first time, a few days ago, there was a small amount of blood on top of the stool. The next bowel movement I saw some blood on the stool and on the first wipe of toilet paper I used. The last time, just today, my stool had long streaks of blood going down the entire length of them. The blood is always bright red or maroon in color.

Now I know people will tell me to probably push for a colonoscopy, of which I am extremely afraid of, but if people would be so kind to answer some questions I'd greatly appreciate it.

1. What is the likelihood of this being colorectal cancer considering the fact that I am 30-years-old and have seen blood in my stool very intermittently (a handful of times a year) for over five years now?

2. I've read that an abdominal CT scan with contrast cannot detect colorectal cancer. Is this true? 

3. Along the lines of the previous question, if someone does has colorectal cancer, what tests are used to stage colorectal cancer? What I'm asking is, even if my abdominal CT scan with contrast could not show colorectal cancer does it provide proof and ensure that at the least if I DID have colorectal cancer that it would be in a VERY early stage?

4. Should I insist on having a colonoscopy done? Are there any reassurances you can give me? I've been spending the last few nights awake until the morning hours just googling symptoms. I've also been having panic attacks and been feeling quite sick and am not sure if it is because I am worrying myself sick or what.

Thank you so much for reading and I'll greatly appreciate any informed answers to my questions.

 

-Steve

trishtabi

Steve, 

Please don't automatically assume you have something wrong like colon cancer. It could also be a stomach ulcer, you worry a lot. People get hemrroids, I every now and then because I can't seem to have a bowel movement. Best thing to do is get a colonoscopy, I promise it   doesn't hurt. Ask for anxiety medicine and that once you go in they will knock you out and wake up and it feels like nothing happened. I had both a colonoscopy and a endoscopy at the same time, I woke up not feeling a thing. Please do this to relieve your anxiety. It doesn't hurt externally or internally to get this done. I hope this helps.

 

Trish

Annabelle41415

Hemmrhoids

That alone could cause all the bleeding, but it would be a wise decision to get a colonscopy.  The test itself isn't bad at all, it's the prep that you take the day before that is the culprit and nasty.  You are young so that is on your side.  Don't assume the worst as it could be several possibilities.  Although the CT scan doesn't really see all tumors, it seems like you have a clean scan but you still should get a scope.  It might help ease your peace of mind as well.

Kim

worrywort87

Thank you very much for the

Thank you very much for the responses and your time. If my doctor says he doesn't think I need a colonoscopy should I press/push him for one? Also, how is colorectal cancer staged? Is the fact that I had a clear abdominal CT scan reassurance that even if I do have colorectal cancer it is only stage 1?

trishtabi

Worrywort

Please just get a colonoscopy to clear your mind and to give you peace of mind Also. No, colorectal  cancer can run in the genes of a family but if it does run in your family get it checked, it stilldoesnt mean you have this. Please push for the colonoscopy to ease YOUR mind. It doesn't hurt tight for peace of mind?

 

 

 

worrywort87

Certainly assuming the

Certainly assuming the colonoscopy would be clear that would be a huge relief for my mind... And even if it isn't clear it is better to find out earlier rather than later. Can my primary doctor order a colonoscopy or do I have to wait for a referral to a gastroenterologist and then ask him to refer me?

Annabelle41415

worrywort87 said:

Certainly assuming the

Certainly assuming the colonoscopy would be clear that would be a huge relief for my mind... And even if it isn't clear it is better to find out earlier rather than later. Can my primary doctor order a colonoscopy or do I have to wait for a referral to a gastroenterologist and then ask him to refer me?

Colonoscopy

About the CT scan showing everything - no it can't.  Mine was rectal cancer at it couldn't pick it up.  Therefore getting a colonoscopy would clear your mind and give you peace.  Yes, your doctor can order that and express your bleeding so they get you in right away.  My doctor attributed it to hehmmroids and bleeding from that and the hosptal took 3 months to book because they didn't think anything serious and it turned out to be a rectal cancer tumor.  Don't let them make you wait.  Get it done and you can then sleep peacefully at night.  I'm sure you have nothing to worry about though.  Let us know what you decide.

Kim

trishtabi

Your doxtor

Worrywort, your doctor should be able to order the colonoscopy with your demand. So please do this and update us on this. Ok?

Trubrit

To answer a few questions

My answers and not anyone elses, especially not a professional. 

1. What is the likelihood of this being colorectal cancer considering the fact that I am 30-years-old and have seen blood in my stool very intermittently (a handful of times a year) for over five years now?

The odds are less, but there are still too many young folks being diagnosed. 

2. I've read that an abdominal CT scan with contrast cannot detect colorectal cancer. Is this true? 

It all depends on the size and positoin of the tumour. 

3. Along the lines of the previous question, if someone does has colorectal cancer, what tests are used to stage colorectal cancer? What I'm asking is, even if my abdominal CT scan with contrast could not show colorectal cancer does it provide proof and ensure that at the least if I DID have colorectal cancer that it would be in a VERY early stage?

Biopsy of the tumour is the usual way to stage CRC.  

4. Should I insist on having a colonoscopy done? Are there any reassurances you can give me? I've been spending the last few nights awake until the morning hours just googling symptoms. I've also been having panic attacks and been feeling quite sick and am not sure if it is because I am worrying myself sick or what.

Step back and take a deep breath. Colonoscopies are expensive. See first if your symptoms could be caused by other bowel problems, like hemmeriods, irritable bowel syndrome, and the others which my head can think of right now.  Blood in the stool, especially if fresh (bright red as opposed to dark) can easily be attributed to irritation of hemmeroids. 

I had to learn (and it wasn't easy) to step back from worry. I kept telling myself that worrying wasn't solving the problem. I had too many sleepless nights. I discovered that for myself, a guided imagery CD helped when I went to bed. I was able to follow the guide and calm my crazy thoughts. Give it a try. It might not work for you, but it can't hurt to try it. 

Best of luck. 

Tru

Bellen

CT Scan and CRC

Hello Steve - If you have a family history of CRC, or if you become so anxious about your symptoms, I think a colonoscopy might be considered.  I have CRC with liver mets. My CT scan did not show my colon tumour and further CT scans that I have had do not mention the colon tumour, but they do show the liver lesions.  So a CT scan does not always show the CRC tumour - at least not in my case.  Best regards in your decision.

TreadLightly90

You should definitely push

You should definitely push for a colonoscopy so you can get some closure on these issues. It's not a guarantee that what you have is cancer, as internal hemmherhoids (not sure if I ever spell that right) could be the cause.

And no worries about the procedure! Just about as easy as getting wisdom teeth pulled since they just make you sleep the whole time. I'd also ask if SUPREP would be an option for you, since it's a very gentle prep that caused no major discomfort for me.

Best wishes.

worrywort87

Thanks for the comments.

Thanks for the comments. While waiting for my doctor's appointment, which is this Monday, there was a period of time where I didn't see any blood and felt some anxiety relief. Hours ago, however, my mood quickly soiled when I went to the bathroom and saw blood coating the stool, as well as, the first wipe of toilet paper I used. 

Is there any significant difference between the blood being a darker shade of red rather than being bright? I've also noticed that my anus has a slight pain to it... sort of like soreness or burning off and on (NOT during bowel movements)...

To be frank, I'm a nervous wreck. I'm panicking and irritable. I'm shaking in fear and dread. 

I'm most definitely going to push for a colonoscopy but is it okay to get the virtual CAT scan colonography rather than the classic? I've heard that it is just as good and sometimes better as long as they don't find anything (and even if they do they can just remove it with a traditional colonoscopy). 

I don't know how to calm down, though. I'm truly in mental anguish... I spend hours googling symptoms and searching for reassurance of my symptoms all the while fully knowing that the only true reassurance I can get is to be scanned. But who knows when they'll book me... I feel a need to know right now RIGHT NOW what I'm dealing with here. I can hardly function due to the stress.

Please tell me, though, if I got an abdominal x-ray and an abdominal CAT scan with contrast does that rule out stage 3 and 4 colorectal cancers? And how rare is it really for a 30-year-old with no family history of colorectal cancer to have it? I've heard there are some people with no family history and the same age as me with sporadic colorectal cancers. I know it happens but how rare is it exactly? One in a million? One in a thousand?

And if I was diagnosed with colorectal cancer what's the likelihood of it being curable? Would it be a death sentence?

My mind is in a great deal of suffering.

 

NHMike

worrywort87 said:

Thanks for the comments.

Thanks for the comments. While waiting for my doctor's appointment, which is this Monday, there was a period of time where I didn't see any blood and felt some anxiety relief. Hours ago, however, my mood quickly soiled when I went to the bathroom and saw blood coating the stool, as well as, the first wipe of toilet paper I used. 

Is there any significant difference between the blood being a darker shade of red rather than being bright? I've also noticed that my anus has a slight pain to it... sort of like soreness or burning off and on (NOT during bowel movements)...

To be frank, I'm a nervous wreck. I'm panicking and irritable. I'm shaking in fear and dread. 

I'm most definitely going to push for a colonoscopy but is it okay to get the virtual CAT scan colonography rather than the classic? I've heard that it is just as good and sometimes better as long as they don't find anything (and even if they do they can just remove it with a traditional colonoscopy). 

I don't know how to calm down, though. I'm truly in mental anguish... I spend hours googling symptoms and searching for reassurance of my symptoms all the while fully knowing that the only true reassurance I can get is to be scanned. But who knows when they'll book me... I feel a need to know right now RIGHT NOW what I'm dealing with here. I can hardly function due to the stress.

Please tell me, though, if I got an abdominal x-ray and an abdominal CAT scan with contrast does that rule out stage 3 and 4 colorectal cancers? And how rare is it really for a 30-year-old with no family history of colorectal cancer to have it? I've heard there are some people with no family history and the same age as me with sporadic colorectal cancers. I know it happens but how rare is it exactly? One in a million? One in a thousand?

And if I was diagnosed with colorectal cancer what's the likelihood of it being curable? Would it be a death sentence?

My mind is in a great deal of suffering.

 

The benefit to doing a

The benefit to doing a colonoscopy is that they can do a biopsy to get it checked. You could have a scan, but if it found something, then you'd need to schedule a colonoscopy and sometimes that can take a while. I went into the ER with rectal bleeding. They examined me, took blood, gave me a CT scan, found a mass, did a colonoscopy - all in the same day. I happened to be fortunate in that the GI guy that does colonoscopies was in that day and had enough time to do me. I have heard stories from others where it can take significant time to get all of this stuff scheduled and done.

Regarding your questions about cancer: if you do have cancer, and there's no conclusive proof that you have it yet, then your doctors will need to figure out the staging. There's a complicated algorithm that determines the staging. And it goes from Stage I to Stage IV. Stage IV is where the cancer has migrated to distant organs or areas of the body and this is the toughest stage to deal with but there are many people that have gotten through it. I'm Stage 3 with some muscle invastion and spread to local lymph nodes. There is a standard treatment that takes about a year and outcomes are decent. My sister-in-law had a sister-in-law with Stage II and it appears that the hospital botched things and she died after nine months. My sister pleaded with her to get second opinions at Dana Farber but they thought that it was a lot of hassle to drive to Boston (four hours).

I know how you feel as I am anxious and neurotic and I actually have cancer. You don't know whether or not you have it and there are a number of other things that this could be. So try to calm down a bit (yes, I know that this is hard to do).

worrywort87

I just had my doctor

I just had my doctor appointment and now I'm extremely panicking... she performed a digital rectal exam and did not find any evidence of hemmhroids but said my stool was dark and mixed with blood. Also, she wants me to get a colonoscopy. The earliest I can get in for just the screening is one week... that's way way way too long and far away. That's only for the intitial appointment and not the colonoscopy itself... so I won't know what's wrong with me for God knows how long. I can't cope with this mental anguish and worry and anxiety and stress this is causing. Not only am I extremely scared of the colonoscopy itself but I'm unbelievably frightened of what they may find. And I have to suffer in this state of panic for several weeks. I don't know what to do. 

NHMike

worrywort87 said:

I just had my doctor

I just had my doctor appointment and now I'm extremely panicking... she performed a digital rectal exam and did not find any evidence of hemmhroids but said my stool was dark and mixed with blood. Also, she wants me to get a colonoscopy. The earliest I can get in for just the screening is one week... that's way way way too long and far away. That's only for the intitial appointment and not the colonoscopy itself... so I won't know what's wrong with me for God knows how long. I can't cope with this mental anguish and worry and anxiety and stress this is causing. Not only am I extremely scared of the colonoscopy itself but I'm unbelievably frightened of what they may find. And I have to suffer in this state of panic for several weeks. I don't know what to do. 

Regarding the colonoscopy: I had two of them in June. The first one, the put me on a bed and talked to me for quite some time describing what they were going to do. They carted me into this room with equipment and they had put in an IV earlier (so yeah, needles). The anesthesiologist talked to me for a bit and then told me that they were going to put me nuder and I counted backwards and was out in about  seconds. Then I woke up in the recovery area. They took me back to the day room and I cleaned up.

The second colonoscopy was a proper one with prep. I took a ton of laxitives the day before so I was cleaned out by the time of the colonoscopy. Same deal - bed, get wheeled in, get put to sleep, wake up in recovery, go home. The worst part of the colonoscopy is the prep. Basically you spend about 6-8 hours on the toilet or really close to one. The actual colonoscopy itself is a piece of cake. You can ask anyone thatt's had one what the hard part is. The thing about the prep, though, is that you're in complete control.

If you can't get the level of service that you want from a particular hospital, perhaps you could try a different hospital unless it's your insurance contolling the access. I was able to schedule pretty quickly but the hospital that I went to has a lot of competition and I found the place to be fairly quiet when I was there. Another hospital that I wanted to use in Boston was much harder - appointments had more wait time.

Please remember, there are lots of other things that this could be.

worrywort87

NHMike said:

Regarding the colonoscopy: I had two of them in June. The first one, the put me on a bed and talked to me for quite some time describing what they were going to do. They carted me into this room with equipment and they had put in an IV earlier (so yeah, needles). The anesthesiologist talked to me for a bit and then told me that they were going to put me nuder and I counted backwards and was out in about  seconds. Then I woke up in the recovery area. They took me back to the day room and I cleaned up.

The second colonoscopy was a proper one with prep. I took a ton of laxitives the day before so I was cleaned out by the time of the colonoscopy. Same deal - bed, get wheeled in, get put to sleep, wake up in recovery, go home. The worst part of the colonoscopy is the prep. Basically you spend about 6-8 hours on the toilet or really close to one. The actual colonoscopy itself is a piece of cake. You can ask anyone thatt's had one what the hard part is. The thing about the prep, though, is that you're in complete control.

If you can't get the level of service that you want from a particular hospital, perhaps you could try a different hospital unless it's your insurance contolling the access. I was able to schedule pretty quickly but the hospital that I went to has a lot of competition and I found the place to be fairly quiet when I was there. Another hospital that I wanted to use in Boston was much harder - appointments had more wait time.

Please remember, there are lots of other things that this could be.

Mike, thank you for taking

Mike, thank you for taking the time to write such detailed responses. I am in a constant state of sheer terror and everyone around me is telling me I'm overreacting and that worrying will do no good. I just can't help it. Even the doctor kept saying it was absolutely not cancer but come on... she has zero evidence to say that. She's just assuming because I'm young with no family history. The fact that she did not feel piles with the digital rectal examination coupled with her saying my stool appeared dark only point the finger and stacks the evidence more and more towards cancer. She said it might be irritable bowel disease which, while better than cancer, is still a horrible sounding condition that I do not know much about. Are piles easily missed by digital rectal exams? She said it might still be piles that were deeper than her finger could reach. I also heard that every year a small number of people die from colonoscopies. I'm worried out of my mind about absolutely everything. Also I have a trip scheduled for November 1st. Is there enough time to get a colonoscopy and the results before my trip? The doctor prescribed me Xanax because I was extremely nervous.

 

NHMike

worrywort87 said:

Mike, thank you for taking

Mike, thank you for taking the time to write such detailed responses. I am in a constant state of sheer terror and everyone around me is telling me I'm overreacting and that worrying will do no good. I just can't help it. Even the doctor kept saying it was absolutely not cancer but come on... she has zero evidence to say that. She's just assuming because I'm young with no family history. The fact that she did not feel piles with the digital rectal examination coupled with her saying my stool appeared dark only point the finger and stacks the evidence more and more towards cancer. She said it might be irritable bowel disease which, while better than cancer, is still a horrible sounding condition that I do not know much about. Are piles easily missed by digital rectal exams? She said it might still be piles that were deeper than her finger could reach. I also heard that every year a small number of people die from colonoscopies. I'm worried out of my mind about absolutely everything. Also I have a trip scheduled for November 1st. Is there enough time to get a colonoscopy and the results before my trip? The doctor prescribed me Xanax because I was extremely nervous.

 

One of the people I work with

One of the people I work with has IBS and has had it for a very long time. This person is mid-70s right now and it causes problems now and then but I think that it's controlled it with diet and exercise. Another person I work with has ulcerative colitis and had bleeding within the past couple of years and had it many years ago and has mostly controlled things with diet and exercise but life stress can bring it back. There is the potential for Crohn's as well. Yes, the doctor that you spoke to may be wrong. The ER doctor that I saw told me that mine was likely cancer after the CT scan - she had no bedside manner but telling me straight was probably best anyways - that hit me like a sledgehammer.

I'm sure that many have already told you this - but there is no practical point to worrying about things that you have little to no control over. North Korea could launch a nuclear device today that could hit the US and launch us into World War III. Is there anything that you or I could do about that? Probably not. That's a rather inane example but I sometimes use extremes as illustration. I'm up at 4:30 AM worrying about cancer spread even though my doctor assured me that it's not possible with the radiation treatment and chemo and I'm really hoping that he's right but I have some worry anyways. Is it rational? I don't know. I suppose that I'd have to look at research papers to get a better feel for it.

You may have some problems to deal with but please don't assume cancer yet. If you do have cancer, there are lots of folks here that can help you through it and please be reassured by that. I certainly have been and I'd say that I'm a bit on the paranoid and neurotic side. Do you have other things that you can focus on right now? When I have a lot of anxiety, I find that working out can really help. The chemo and radiation have often reduced me to walking a lot (I like to run, play tennis, lift weights, etc.). Maybe you could just go for a walk when you feel anxious. Exercise supposedly causes your body to produce chemicals to help make you feel better along with improving GI function. There are lots of times when I have a lot of gas and walking helps that. My goal is 10,000 steps per day (five miles) but I usually only get about 4 miles per day. But maybe set a goal and try to achieve it every day and then do a little more every day. Walking will be good whether you have cancer or not - and, if you do have it, your doctor will likely ask you to walk regularly through the treatment. Are there other areas of your life you can work on? I have a long list of home maintenance chores to do and I knocked off several of them this past weekend. Accomplishing goals is good for mental health and can take your mind off problems or potential problems coming down the road.

Would a pet help? A lady on another board with Stage 4 likes to go riding on her horse. Maybe a pet (cat or dog) could help you through your worries.

As far as scheduling goes: that's up to your hospital and the doctors that they use. My scheduling worked like this:

Go to ER 2 AM, get examined, CT scan in the morning, colonoscopy in the afternoon (without standard prep). The GI guy asked me to schedule another colonoscopy to check the rest of the colon and I think that my scheduling was for about four days after I called. My GI guy was voted best doctor in my state by his peers. I found this out after the fact. Yes, I'm sure that people die from procedures in hospitals as there are accidents but you can get ranking information on the hospitals in your area if your hospital is nationally ranked. I think that I got my results back within four days in both cases. But they might not find any cancerous stuff and they will tell you whether they found something and sent it out for pathology or didn't find anything.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

gsmith53

worrywort87 said:

Thank you very much for the

Thank you very much for the responses and your time. If my doctor says he doesn't think I need a colonoscopy should I press/push him for one? Also, how is colorectal cancer staged? Is the fact that I had a clear abdominal CT scan reassurance that even if I do have colorectal cancer it is only stage 1?

WorryWort

Tell the doctor that you found blood in the stool. I'll guarantee that he'll order the colonoscopy. If he doesn't you need a new doctor, because this one is an idiot.

If I had gotten a colonoscopy when I SHOULD have, I would not have been stage 3c colon cancer.

gsmith53

worrywort87 said:

I just had my doctor

I just had my doctor appointment and now I'm extremely panicking... she performed a digital rectal exam and did not find any evidence of hemmhroids but said my stool was dark and mixed with blood. Also, she wants me to get a colonoscopy. The earliest I can get in for just the screening is one week... that's way way way too long and far away. That's only for the intitial appointment and not the colonoscopy itself... so I won't know what's wrong with me for God knows how long. I can't cope with this mental anguish and worry and anxiety and stress this is causing. Not only am I extremely scared of the colonoscopy itself but I'm unbelievably frightened of what they may find. And I have to suffer in this state of panic for several weeks. I don't know what to do. 

I avoided the colonoscopy for years, for the very same reasons. It wasn't the procedure. It was what they might find that scared me. I waited too long and it became way worse that it could have been.

I finally got a CT. They found a mass that was huge. I was admitted to the ER that same day. Ordered the colonoscopy a day after prep, in the hospital. Found the mass was there and almost completely blocking my colon. Surgical resection the next day removing all of my Sigmoid colon, 12 inches.

That was Valentines Day 2017. I have been in chemo (Folfox) ever since, until the final one, last week. CT scan last Monday. And good news today. I am now post chemo, and NED.

What I am trying to say, is... delaying because you are scared is much worse than doing what is good for you. Get the colonoscopy, so that you will KNOW. Don't worry about it to the point of not doing what you need to do. My oncologist said that mine grew from a polyp that could have been removed by the colonoscopy years ago. Get it done.

Trubrit

gsmith53 said:

I avoided the colonoscopy for years, for the very same reasons. It wasn't the procedure. It was what they might find that scared me. I waited too long and it became way worse that it could have been.

I finally got a CT. They found a mass that was huge. I was admitted to the ER that same day. Ordered the colonoscopy a day after prep, in the hospital. Found the mass was there and almost completely blocking my colon. Surgical resection the next day removing all of my Sigmoid colon, 12 inches.

That was Valentines Day 2017. I have been in chemo (Folfox) ever since, until the final one, last week. CT scan last Monday. And good news today. I am now post chemo, and NED.

What I am trying to say, is... delaying because you are scared is much worse than doing what is good for you. Get the colonoscopy, so that you will KNOW. Don't worry about it to the point of not doing what you need to do. My oncologist said that mine grew from a polyp that could have been removed by the colonoscopy years ago. Get it done.

DITTO gsmith53

I too waited, until it was (almost) too late. Now I am Stage IV. Find the Cancer if it is there, at Stage I II or III and you'll be so much better off. 

Tru

worrywort87

Thanks for the responses. I

Thanks for the responses. I am really psyching myself out with worry. Back in 2009 I was also having some rectal bleeding and my anxiety then made me think it may be colorectal cancer. The doctor didn't think I needed a colonoscopy but was willing to send me in for in. I chickened out and never got it done. 

This time around, now that I'm older, I'm trying much much harder to not chicken out. I have my first appointment with the gastro doctor this Monday and I'm so tempted to ask him whether or not he thinks I need a colonoscopy. At the same time, though, if I were to chicken out again I would be setting myself up for a lot of unnecessary anxiety by not really knowing if I am okay or not. 

I'm trying to take things a step at a time but I am just completely incapable. I guess I just have to wait and see what the gastroenterologist says this Monday. I was really wanting the safer and less invasive virtual colonoscopy done if anything but my primary care physician wouldn't hear it. I am a passive person and I just cannot seem to get doctors to listen to me.