Fear of Recurrence

Beechu

Hi, you can call me Bee. I was diagnosed a year ago today. Today was a really tough day for me and I was wondering if anyone had any advice on how I can deal with the fear of my cancer of coming back. I was diagnosed on March 11, 2016. I went through chemotherapy from May to July and I'm happy to say that I'm much better now. And today, March 11, 2017 has been the hardest day for me psychologically. No matter how I distracted myself, I kept thinking about my cancer. I even toke a nap today and I dreamt about it. It's started to consume me to the point that I exploded in tears to my boyfriend who has been nothing but helpful. He has tried to help me but I felt like I needed to talk to someone who has been through it. 

NoTimeForCancer

Bee, first know that you are

Bee, first know that you are not alone.  I think all of us have had the fear and every time we go for a scan or a test - that fear is there.  I believe it truly is NORMAL.  

The fear gets to be less and less over time, but I would recommend speaking to your pastor or priest, if you work I would also recommend calling your health care provider's EAP (Employee Assistance Program).  It does help to TALK to someone about it and understand why you feel that way.  

Selda

know howbyou feel

hi bee. I'm selda. I will celebrate, if that's what you want to call it, on May 5th. I'm always frightened. I think you loose more mentally and emotionally than you do physically. I did. My best friend told me about scanxiety.  My first MRI I thought everything was past me and that the world had returned to normal. The minute they started pumping imaging fluid through my veins and I entered that horrible machine I lost it. Its agonizing to hear your clear and then in the same breath hear your chance of recurrence. Your not alone. I have taken so much of my anger and loss out on my husband and he has never let me down. Our partners loose something too. Your not alone.