Update
We saw the urologist/oncologist today. He gave us the news that it has not spread but removal is necessary. my husband is scheduled for surgery next week and we are busy getting pre ops etc. thanks to everyone that shared their story with me, everyone who prayed, and all the reassurance. I'm thankful that I found this site because if it wasn't for the responses I received I would of been complete doom and gloom.
Comments
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So far
I would say this is best case scenario based on what you ae dealing with. The situation sounds just like mine. 41, male, healthy, no previous issue, 10 cm tumor of right kidney, contained to the kidney. 4 months later, thanks to great doctors, support at home, and the support of this fourm, life is as close to normal as it can be. Be strong.....you guys are going to get thru this!
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Best wishes Maxie
Before you know it, it'll be behind you guys and he'll be on the mend. Make sure he does his breathing exercises post-surgery, this will help prevent pneumonia. Let us know if you have any other questions.....he's lucky to have you.
I'll keep you both in my prayers,
Donna~
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As Good As News Like That Can Be
To be told you have to have surgery is never good, but the fact that it's totally contained within the kidney is good to hear. As it's his first surgery, some suggestions:
1. The nurses will ask him to walk pretty shortly after his surgery. Walking is one of the very best things he can do for his recovery.
2. They'll give him a spyrometer. It's a contraption that has a plastic hose and you do breathing exercises with it. Make sure he does that often. One of the biggest complications after surgery is pneumonia. I know because after one of my abdominal surgeries, I ended up back in the hospital for ten days because of pneumonia. The breathing exercises help prevent that.
3. If he has open surgery (meaning not minimally invasive), they will be cutting through some pretty big muscle groups and when those start to knit back together, it's pretty painful to move. He'll find that a pillow is his best friend to hold tightly onto if he has to cough, laugh or, God forbid, sneeze.
4. Did I mention walking? Because I'll reiterate.....that's really important.
I'm sure everyone else has a lot more to add, but if you can not so gently remind him about these three, that'll go a long way to helping him to recover somewhat more comfortably and quickly.
Good luck and best wishes.
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Best wishes
To you and your husband. Yesterday was one full month from my own surgery, my tumor was over 10cm. It has been a difficult month, at first physically, then emotionally, but I think I am getting stronger every day. He's lucky he has you to lean on, I wish you both the very best!
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Good news and good luck
Dont do what my wife did and buy him a copy of Dante's Inferno to read as he recovers.
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Thanks
for all the support. I can use all the support I can get through this time. I've actually printed out the notes from above regarding surgery and recovery. Is there anything else I should be aware of? Any tips that you could share? I will be taking the week off, but then my kids will be taking the next week to help out. I just want to. E able to give them as many tools as possible. Again thank you to each and every one of you.
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Trying to be as much relaxed as possible
is the best tip I can personally give you! Even after hearing that the tumor is contained the prospect of surgery can be very scary. My wait was so long (one month) that it got to be very trying. so when the morning of surgery finally came I gave in and relaxed. I remember not wanting to take the anxiolitic that morning before surgery because the night before, instead of relaxing me it gave me a reverse effect. So there I was in pre-surgery room and a couple doctors come in, read my file and say: So you didn't want to take a pill this morning! I say no and explain why and one says: Not even a little drag of pot??? too bad it would have relaxed you! I laughed and some minutes after in the surgery room I was asking if they had brazilian bossa nova to play! They asked me to go to my favorite beach and close my eyes and next thing I was back in my hospital room and it was over! Everything will workout fine, try to keep up the good energy, the good humor and some lightness about it all. It helps enormously!
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Advice from My Wife
This is from my wife. Without her, my whole experience would have been extremely different and impossibly hard.
First, make sure someone is with you at the hospital while the operation is taking place. Don't be alone. We were fortunate that she had one of her brothers, his girlfriend (a registered nurse) and a niece with her while I was in the OR.
Second, both this week while you're running around like mad trying to prepare, next week when your husband is in the hospital and during his recuperation, make sure to find some time each day for yourself.....some calm time either away from everyone or with a close friend.
Third, don't try to be SuperWoman. My wife tried this during one of my abdominal surgeries and the result was she was way overstressed. Get help for some of the day-to-day things like grocery shopping, tidying the house and doing the laundry. Helping someone like me (and, believe me, ALL husbands are like me) is a full time job in and of itself. Get some help.
Things should start to calm down a couple of days after your husband gets home and he understands what he has to do, what he can do and what he can't quite do yet.
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