Five years NED
Haven't been here for awhile.. FIVE years out and still NED.... so what's with my not wanting to do ANYTHING? I should be incredibly happy and up for whatever! Anyone else????
Comments
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Lorikat
First, let me say congratulations on reaching the 5-year mark! You know that is huge!
As for your lack of desire to do anything, I can relate to that. I have days when I just don't care if I get anything done or not and must force myself to do the things that I have to do. I'm not sure why I feel this way sometimes--perhaps a little depression or anger, I don't know. I do get really angry sometimes thinking about time lost while I was having to fight this beast. I am also dealing with my mom, who has dementia, and getting little or no support from the rest of my family. Some days I am just exhausted. I guess it all adds up sometimes.
I wish you brighter days ahead and many, many more anniversaries such as this one. Take care!
Martha
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Lorikat.....
Congratulations on 5 years NED!!!! Stirring up motivation can sometimes be difficult for those who do not have our history, so it is not unusuall that you may feel like this. I found that it helped me to volunteer at our local community center and to at least for a couple hours each week open my eyes to the challenges that other people face rather than to dwell on anything going on in my own life, cancer related or otherwise. Our community center is a food pantry / resource center serving about 500 people each month. Over the years I have become more involved with various projects there and am now volunteering a few days each week......I often think I am the one being helped more than the clients we serve!
While "incredible happiness" sounds like a dream.....it was I guess never promised to anyone, but a realistic level of feeling good should be expected. If you can not get past the way you feel it might help to mention this to your doctor. You have been through a lot in the past 5 years and deserve to celebrate where you are today both physically and emotionally!!!
Again, congrats on getting here and I will continue to keep wishing you health and happiness in the years ahead!
katheryn
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Thank you Martha. I was caremp327 said:Lorikat
First, let me say congratulations on reaching the 5-year mark! You know that is huge!
As for your lack of desire to do anything, I can relate to that. I have days when I just don't care if I get anything done or not and must force myself to do the things that I have to do. I'm not sure why I feel this way sometimes--perhaps a little depression or anger, I don't know. I do get really angry sometimes thinking about time lost while I was having to fight this beast. I am also dealing with my mom, who has dementia, and getting little or no support from the rest of my family. Some days I am just exhausted. I guess it all adds up sometimes.
I wish you brighter days ahead and many, many more anniversaries such as this one. Take care!
Martha
Thank you Martha. I was care giver for my Mom while I was going through treatment. Fortunately my brother stepped up when I had to go to MDA. Coming home and helping out after tx was brutal. Sometimes I think I wasn't the kindest to my Mom because she spent her last week in hospice and she so did not want to. But I couldn't lift her to get her on the potty or anything. I did continue to pay her caregiver while Mom was there. She would stay nights and I would stay days. my brother wandered in and out.... someone was always with her...
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Thank you and I know you areeihtak said:Lorikat.....
Congratulations on 5 years NED!!!! Stirring up motivation can sometimes be difficult for those who do not have our history, so it is not unusuall that you may feel like this. I found that it helped me to volunteer at our local community center and to at least for a couple hours each week open my eyes to the challenges that other people face rather than to dwell on anything going on in my own life, cancer related or otherwise. Our community center is a food pantry / resource center serving about 500 people each month. Over the years I have become more involved with various projects there and am now volunteering a few days each week......I often think I am the one being helped more than the clients we serve!
While "incredible happiness" sounds like a dream.....it was I guess never promised to anyone, but a realistic level of feeling good should be expected. If you can not get past the way you feel it might help to mention this to your doctor. You have been through a lot in the past 5 years and deserve to celebrate where you are today both physically and emotionally!!!
Again, congrats on getting here and I will continue to keep wishing you health and happiness in the years ahead!
katheryn
Thank you and I know you are right. I caught myself in a poor me mood. I will just get moving!
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CONGRATS Lorikat!!
5 years!!! So happy for you!!!
Only those who have been there understand what this means, so it may seem anti-climatic to others.
I think everyone gets in a rut and feels this way at some point.
Continued healthy & wellnes to you!
- Tracey
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