The fear of what's next

Lindsaylou Member Posts: 1

Hello Everyone

My name is Lindsay and my dad was diagnosed with Lung Cancer on Dec. 23rd 2014. Right now I am feeling quite lost and confused. My dad had his right lower  lung removed and had several chemo treatments. He was told he was cancer free in May of 2015. 3 weeks later they found it went to his brain. He has had a new spot found in his brain every time he has a new scan. A total of 4. He receives cyberknife radiation to treat it. They said soon it will be too many and will have to have full head radiation. Now he had a Chest Scan and they found a new tumor in the other lung. it has doubled in size in 2 weeks.

My dad has not been emotionally stable since this all began 1 year and 4 months ago. He is single and just wastes away in his room. He does not let the doctors say things in front of him....Like, stages, sizes, survival rate. At the start of all of this I would have to go to another room with the doctors to talk. Now I have missed so much time at work I have to miss some appointments. I dont feel as on top of things as I used to.  The doctors have been positive through this whole process but never just lay it on the line for me. I know it is at the point where it cant be stopped. Today he had his first treatment of Optivo. Is Optivo a last ditch effort? Does anyone have a experiences with this Immunotherapy drug?

Thanks in advance for anything you can share with me.



  • Noellesmom
    Noellesmom Member Posts: 1,859 Member

    We all start getting short on leave.

    I would definitely call the oncologist's office and ask to speak to your dad's nurse.  The nurse should be able to fill you in on everything.

    Optivo  is advertised heavily where we live.  I do believe it is intended to prolong life: I don't know if it can cure.


  • ATBrady
    ATBrady Member Posts: 5
    Same boat

    Hi Lindsaylou,

    My dad was recently diagnoised with stage 4 lung cancer and it's been very rough on me. The oncologist did not give us a time frame and he will begin his chemo therapy this upcoming Monday. How did you deal with the news and the role of his caregiver since his diagnosis? I feel very isolated and lonely in my experience because I'm his only daughter and have a close relationship with him. How do you manage to balance your own life while caring for him? I've missed a lot of work because of his appointments. My husband and I are also newlyweds and it's been difficult on our marriage as well. 



  • JOinMO
    JOinMO Member Posts: 9
    I don't have an answer

    I don't have an answer about the medication being a last ditch attempt to help, but wanted to respond anyway.  You should be eligible for Family Medical Leave, which gives you 12 weeks off per calendar year without any impact to your employment.  Have you checked into it?