relate in washington state

lostinthefog

where to start well i guess the best place to start in any story is the beging...in april of 2015 i got the news no one wishes to ever get..YOU HAVE CANCER, needless to say i ended up in a blank space i was numb for weeks. i didnt eat, barely spoke and all i wanted to do was lay in bed alone. i was dianossed with stage 1 grade 3 uterine cancer. in the beging after the countless blood draws the doctors discovered for the last two years my blood levels had droped to 6.1 which if you are not aware the body is supposed to have 12 total. i felt like this big walking experiment to all the doctors everyone who came incontact with me didnt believe i wasnt in the hospital let alone dead. well as some may relate to this next part i was refered to an oncologist who seemed great in the begining until i started to get sicker. this doctor basically told me the pain i was having was all in my head and the type of cancer i have does not cause pelvic pain. after my 20th trip to the ER being draged by my husband and mother i decided that if my oncoligist wasnt going to help me then i would take this into my own hands completly. i then found an amazing team of doctors at the seattle cancer care alience center in seattle wa. from the moment i walked in there i felt like i had some form of hope, they were giving me a chance.  after speaking with my new oncologist and the fantastic team of doctors they set the date for my hyster. surgery. that august came, my surgery did take longer then planned but went very well. in my last scan before the  surgery they did see a spot on one of my lungs that there is concern about but wanted to wait for my 6 month check up to follow up since i had been under for so long the doctors did not want to go poking and proding around. after surgery i was on the road to recovery, i could tell the difference in a matter of hours and days after the surgery. my color is back i dont get tired as easliy, i have loads more energy. im still not 100% but getting there. i think more so i have been dealing with more emotional feelings like the fact i wont ever be able to have kids of my own, the what if: what if it comes back. what if they didnt get it all. i think some of the hardest things i have had to deal with wasnt so much the 20 differnt types of pills the forced, the surgerys, the worring or walking around like a walking pin cusion. i think its been more so the looks i get from people, the way they treat me when they find out i have cancer like its contagus or that your dead already just a walking time bomb and the fact that family and friends who were so close dont even speak to me anymore. i try to reach out but distance is all i get. i know it has been a ruff road for my husband as well, sometimes he frustrates me when he acts like i should be moving on by i have to remind myself that i wasnt the only person who got the news that day he did as well. i know its been a tuff journey and some days are better then others but the one thing that has been the best is to know i get one more day. if there is anyone out there in washington state who wants to chat please write me back i know its hard to find someone who can relate in your own age group trust me im still looking. hope this gives someone peace.