My sister

button2

My little sister was just diagnosed with Stage 0 cacinoma in-situ. I am so upset and somehow feeling weirdly guilty. I thank God it was caught early like this and have assured her she will make a full recovery. I can't help but wonder about so many women who get mets with early cancers like this though. Mine was advanced Stage 2 Her2 pos so a very different illness. My sister will get surgery and some rads only as she didn't want to accept the option of waiting to see. She says I might have saved her life since she is now so diligent with her mammograms and also that she chose to proceed to treatment right away. She is also getting genetic testing that was not needed for me since I was the first to get bc. I worry for my other two sisters and daughter. Difficult times....Anna

P.S. I would appreciate any ideas of how to be supportive because we live on different continents. I sent a card today and e-mail daily. What else can I do?

New Flower

Anna I am very sorry that your sister got cancer

Weekly Skype sessions or any other video chats will be really good. Open communications to discuss treatment options, different topics outside of cancer world, let her vent if she needs.

I wish her reasonably easy treatment and good emotional support. She can also joint CSN and ask her questions directly. 

Hugs to both of you

aisling8

New Flower said:

Anna I am very sorry that your sister got cancer

Weekly Skype sessions or any other video chats will be really good. Open communications to discuss treatment options, different topics outside of cancer world, let her vent if she needs.

I wish her reasonably easy treatment and good emotional support. She can also joint CSN and ask her questions directly. 

Hugs to both of you

I'm sorry about your sister

From the tone of your posts on this board, I perceive you as a very caring person. I'm sure you'll be very supportive of your sister just as you have been to your pink sisters here. One thing, though, I thought I'd mention, since you had a rigorous chemo regime and more invasive surgery than she may be having, she may hesitate to "complain" about her surgery and radiation thinking that you had a tougher road. But we all know fear and waiting are universal!

Best of luck to you both,

Victoria

VickiSam

New Flower said:

Anna I am very sorry that your sister got cancer

Weekly Skype sessions or any other video chats will be really good. Open communications to discuss treatment options, different topics outside of cancer world, let her vent if she needs.

I wish her reasonably easy treatment and good emotional support. She can also joint CSN and ask her questions directly. 

Hugs to both of you

Olga .. Excellent suggestions!

Difficult  ..  as we all KNOW there are times when we want to talk about the beast,  and other times .. when we want to be left alone in my case.

Just knowing that you are there for your sister 24/7 means the world to a Sister in PINK battling the beast.

 

Vicki Sam

TraciInLA

Just be there

Anna,

I think the most important thing you can do for your sister is exactly what you're doing -- keep letting her know you're there for her with simple little "thinking of you today" emails, cards, texts, etc.

I bet all of us here have stories of at least one friend or family member who dropped off the face of the earth as soon as they heard we had cancer.  No matter how supportive everyone else in your life is, that still hurts, and it's just so important to know that others are there when you're feeling down or alone or scared in the middle of the night.

Doesn't have to be anything fancy or eloquent -- just a simple "thinking of you" or "sending you a hug."  Having said that, if you want to go a step further, I do have a couple of favorites:

I have friends in their 30s all the way to their 90s who just love Jacquie Lawson's e-cards:  http://www.jacquielawson.com/  I use them all the time to let folks going through tough times know I'm thinking of them -- they're fun, and beautiful to look at.

I also love, love LOVE Emily McDowell's ridiculously funny and on-point cards specifically for serious illnesses: http://emilymcdowell.com/collections/cards/Empathy-Cards  Example:  "When life gives you lemons, I promise I won't tell you a story about my cousin's friend who died of lemons."  I mean, SERIOUSLY, have we all been there or what?

Traci

disneyfan2008

aisling8 said:

I'm sorry about your sister

From the tone of your posts on this board, I perceive you as a very caring person. I'm sure you'll be very supportive of your sister just as you have been to your pink sisters here. One thing, though, I thought I'd mention, since you had a rigorous chemo regime and more invasive surgery than she may be having, she may hesitate to "complain" about her surgery and radiation thinking that you had a tougher road. But we all know fear and waiting are universal!

Best of luck to you both,

Victoria

Vicotira-I agree-i was in the

Vicotira-I agree-i was in the same boat a Family life time friend had cancer very bad-and I only had sugery and radation-SO I new said much about my  situation-thinking mine was so simple (as it can be with the word cancer).

 

 

Denise

disneyfan2008

I think you have the right

I think you have the right idea-cards, emails, phone calls. Some people, like to vent and others do not-i would just go with your gut on how to handle this day by day.

 

Sorry you are far apart.

 

Denise

button2

Thank you all so much

Thank you Olga, Victoria, Denise, Vicki Sam and Tracii. Your suggestions are all very helpful. I may have had a tougher road but I think everyone who gets this kind of diagnosis goes thru the same "OMG It's CANCER" kind of feeling. You just never really know how things are going to go and that's the biggest stress of all. I certainly plan on being there for my sister as she was for me. I think I will put her name on the sticker when I do the Run for Life (5K) in September!!

lintx

button2 said:

Thank you all so much

Thank you Olga, Victoria, Denise, Vicki Sam and Tracii. Your suggestions are all very helpful. I may have had a tougher road but I think everyone who gets this kind of diagnosis goes thru the same "OMG It's CANCER" kind of feeling. You just never really know how things are going to go and that's the biggest stress of all. I certainly plan on being there for my sister as she was for me. I think I will put her name on the sticker when I do the Run for Life (5K) in September!!

Anna

I'm very sorry to hear of your sister's cancer.  I think she is absolutely correct to say you may have saved her life.  Thankfully, she scheduled herself for a mammogram.  You're already doing all the right things!  Everyone needs a sister like you.  Linda

button2

lintx said:

Anna

I'm very sorry to hear of your sister's cancer.  I think she is absolutely correct to say you may have saved her life.  Thankfully, she scheduled herself for a mammogram.  You're already doing all the right things!  Everyone needs a sister like you.  Linda

Thank you so much Linda. My

Thank you so much Linda. My sister finally got scheduled for her MRI this Wednesday and we are hoping they won't find anything else besides her tiny lump. Your kind words mean so much right now. Hugs, Anna

tjhay1

dont feel guilty you did save

dont feel guilty you did save her life, as far as helping her just love her as hard as you can every moment of every day and let her know that you are doing that