Not getting any treatment

yamster34

It was September 13, 2014. I had been in the emergency room since 9:00pm the night before. After going through many tests, I got the diagnosis at 5:00am. I was told that I had end stage terminal ovarian cancer that spread to my liver and spleen. The doctor wanted to admit me to the hospital. From how it sounded, he did not think I had much time left to live. My husband suggested that we go home, get some sleep and pray. We got a little sleep and then went to see our pastor. I suddenly realized that only God knows when I will die and if the doctor was thinking I was close to death anyways, only a miracle from God was going to save me. My husband and I discussed it and decided against treatment and surgery and instead decided we would trust the Lord to treat me. Hospice was called in and they are such a blessing. Hospice does not get called in unless the doctor believes you have 6 months or less to live. Most of my family did not understand the decision to not have treatment, but they have since come around. I have been through blood clots, which I briefly used blood thinner injections for. Between all of the fluid built up in my stomach and losing 32 pounds in 32 days, the injections caused me more pain than the blood clots had. The other problem with that was that part of the clot moved to my right lung causing breathing problems. I decided to then trust the Lord with that too. I have also had a build up of fluid in my stomach. Originally my husband took me to the emergency room everytime fluid needed to be drained. Someone then mentioned the PluerX catheter. My husband and I decided that it was a good idea. I went to the hospital to have it inserted in my stomach. The surgery itself was not explained to me much at all. I thought it would be similar to the procedure to have the fluid removed at the hospital. The doctor that was putting it in had done the fluid removal for me before. He highly recommended that I get an IV for pain medicine. I reluctantly did and I was glad. I was awake through the whole surgery, which was pretty painful. It was an outpatient surgery so the doctor sent me to the recovery room  I got to the recovery room at about 2:00pm and was told I could go home at 5:00pm. I had taken 2 Tylonol#3 during those 3 hours and they did nothing for the pain. At 5:00pm I tried to sit up so I could go home. It felt like my stomach got a cramp that would not ease at all. The nurse let me stay in the recovery room a while longer. With the excrutiating pain I was in, the drive home was aweful. When we got home, getting up to go to the bathroom was horrible. I have a pretty high pain tolerance, but to me, on a scale of 1-10, my pain level was 15. It took 24 hours before my pain became more tolerable. At that point, the pain was reduced by half, thankfully. I did not notice much difference in the pain in the next 24 hours. After 48 hours the pain level was constantly getting bettet. I am glad that I did not know how painful it would be because I may not have gotten it done. Now, I love it because my husband and I can easily drain the fluid in the comfort of our home. I had so much fluid built up, that it went into my legs. This made it very difficult to walk, as well as uncomfortable. We started draining the fluid 3 times a week. We drained 2 liters of fluid everytime for 3 weeks. As we drained the fluid from my stomach, the fluid in my legs started going down too. Now we only need to drain around 3 liters of fluid a week. Aside from around 2 months of pain in more than 6 months, I have been very comfortable. Not long after being diagnosed, I became vegan. I was struggling to get enough protein, so I realized that it was not right for me. Although having so many servings of fruits and vegetables each day made me feel great. Not long ago, I got back to some of the old bad eating habits and I notice that I do not feel as good as I did when I was eating a healthy and balanced diet. For me, eating healthy has been a good alternative to traditional treatment. I tell people often that if God heals me here, I win and if He takes me home I win. All I can say is that this diagnosis has been a true blessing to me and I have seen many answered prayers because of it.  My faith and positive attitude have made a big difference in my experience with terminal cancer. I am sure everyone has a completely different experience or outcome, but this is what is working for me. I choose to live life to the fullest, knowing that God could take me home anytime. My husband and I are planning to renew our weddingvows this November, believing I will still be alive and well then. When it cones to how long any of us will live following a terminal caner diagnosis, doctors can only make their best guess, based on what they have seen and read about other patients with the same diagnosis. I refuse to believe that I only have a short time left to live. One of the hospice nurses made an interesting comment, saying "we are all born terminal", "therefore we will all die simetime". This puts things in perspective.

Susan P

not getting treatment

Hi - I read your post with interest - your atitude is awesome & an inspiration.

.  I say ifyou & your husband agree with the way you have chosen to deal with this go for it.  please don'tlet yourself live with pain unnecessarily.

 

 

Bbest wishes coming your way and may God bless & keep you through this.

 

Come back &  visit often -- we understand.

 

Suysan P from southern Alberta Canada & TX& WY

 

NoTimeForCancer

Thank you for sharing.  I

Thank you for sharing.  I agree with Susan's thoughts would agree, don't hesitate to ask for pain medication when you need it.  Prayers to you and your family.

yamster34

NoTimeForCancer said:

Thank you for sharing.  I

Thank you for sharing.  I agree with Susan's thoughts would agree, don't hesitate to ask for pain medication when you need it.  Prayers to you and your family.

Thank you both! I am taking

Thank you both! I am taking pain medication as needed. I am thankful that Hospice makes sure I am comfortable by providing me with more medicine when I need it! Although, sometimes I am stubborn and wait until the pain gets too bad before taking anything. Overall, God has kept me from unbarable pain most of the time! I have seen at least 30 of my prayers answered through this diagnosis! God is great! 

pandagypsy

I wish you all the

I wish you all the best..........I love the comment "we are all born terminal"..........so many people just don't understand that....no, we are not in a hurry to "leave"; but that is everyone's fate.  We should be able to pick our own final exit. I am happy that you and your husband are in agreement, great strength in that.

yamster34

pandagypsy said:

I wish you all the

I wish you all the best..........I love the comment "we are all born terminal"..........so many people just don't understand that....no, we are not in a hurry to "leave"; but that is everyone's fate.  We should be able to pick our own final exit. I am happy that you and your husband are in agreement, great strength in that.

This would be much differenr

This would be much different without my husband's full support! I am thankful that God blessed me with such a supportive husband! Because I do not do well with standing in one place for very long, my husband does all of the cooking. The funny thing is that I have never liked cooking before. Now I watch a bunch of cooking shows and can't wait until I am strong enough to cook some of the good sounding recipes I have found.

Pattyn

yamster34 said:

This would be much differenr

This would be much different without my husband's full support! I am thankful that God blessed me with such a supportive husband! Because I do not do well with standing in one place for very long, my husband does all of the cooking. The funny thing is that I have never liked cooking before. Now I watch a bunch of cooking shows and can't wait until I am strong enough to cook some of the good sounding recipes I have found.

God Bless You. Your faith

God Bless You. Your faith already healed you in many ways.

yamster34

Pattyn said:

God Bless You. Your faith

God Bless You. Your faith already healed you in many ways.

You are right Pattyn, my

You are right Pattyn, my faith has healed me! Many people around me said that the pale grayish tint of my skin has been replaced by a healthy color! Plus, we do not need to drain as much fluid as before, which tells me that my liver is being healed. None of this is near as important as the peace I feel and the increased intimacy in my relationship with Jesus! God put it on my heart to write a Christian book. The first one was written before getting diagnosed. I have started writing the second one which starts with my journey through this cancer diagnosis. God gave me word that there will be at least 3 books. I have recently been having a problem with horrible glare. Many times, I can't read things well on my phone and sometimes on anything else because brightness hurts my eyes. During this time of my physical sight being a problem, the Lord has opened my spiritual eyes. Not that I believe He will choose to take my sight, but if He does, I am fine with it because He will carry me through that as He is everything else! Praise the Lord, for He is amazing! Through these times of trial, I have realized that the only thing of importance here on earth is being able to serve Him with everything I have!