Met someone and a few weeks later he found out he has leukemia.

angiep

So this is my story. Few months ago I met a guy. There was chemistry and great communication between us and everything was going well towards starting a relationship until 3 weeks after our first meeting when he told me that he had some blood tests and his doctor was afraid of leukemia.

In fact during Easter he got the results and it was acute leukemia. So this changed everything for him concerning us and he told me that he couldn’t drag into this since we had just met and he didn’t know what to expect and how he would handle it and he wouldn’t be able to offer me the things I deserved. Perfectly reasonable one would argue. He told me that he wouldn’t say this to anyone but me and the reason he entrusted me with this was so that he would not disappear and think of him as an **** and to be honest about everything. Still no one else knows. He has been having problems with his enzyme for years and he doesn’t want people to feel pity and care about him. He is very proud. I told him I would be there for him all the way and that’s what I’m doing even though it hurts that he doesn’t want us to be together as a couple. I mostly keep contact and we see each other every once in a while because it’s hard to see me as a friend as he’s told me. It’s hard for me too but I’m handling it because I know that he wants me to be to his friend and I’m trying to respect it. I don’t know if I’m dealing with the situation right.

The first treatment failed so he was disappointed and has been withdrawing ever since. He’s undergoing treatment now to get rid of the alternative chemicals of the first treatment so that his body is clean for the next round of treatment probably chemo. He couldn’t start with chemo because of his enzyme problems. That’s what he told me. Whenever he get results he is distant and nervous and gets angry and I’m trying to be as discreet as possible.

He doesn’t want much contact and prefers spending all his time with his friends who don’t know anything so he feels good around them whereas I know and he feels awkward. I’m jealous. Sometimes I even think that he has been lying about the whole leukemia and hate it!Am I handing all this right? I don’t know how to help him. It hurts that he is avoiding me in person for coffee or something. He is always sweet and kind when I call or text him or bump into him by accident but he doesn’t want to arrange going out for example. He told me it’s his defense. I’m in love and I’m trying so hard to be his friend but I want to do it because I care about him and want to be in his life even in this way but I feel like bumping into a wall every time I suggest doing something together.