relationships while terminal/inoperable

Altruistic_bent

Long story short. I live in a rural area. So does my partner of four years. Until Obama care kicked in she was withouta psychologist and psychatrist to take care of her emotional health. As I have become sicker things became so toxic between us that we both made the decision to reform our relationship. Before we lived together. Now we don't. I took care of her emotionally and essentially at the end of the day spoiled her by doing anything I could within reason. I don't do that any longer. 

 

We both agreed the relationship was unhealthy and are going to continue to be family to each other. The problem is my heart is still hers and Iideas no idea when I will die. I am happy for the most part but suffer emotional pangs from it all. I know with her gone I will still suffer a lot more. To put time into perspective I stopped treatment for upper g.i. / stomach? It'sa staged at t4/m1 and stopped treatment 2 years ago. 

any resources or books you suggest we read to help us through this?