Valarie Harper.....

Marynb
Marynb Member Posts: 1,118
edited September 2013 in Anal Cancer #1
Valarie Harper has supposedly been told she has months to live with brain cancer and she is appearing on Dancing With the Stars. For some reason, I am finding this disturbing. I am not sure why, but it feels like she is presenting a false image of what most cancer patients go through. Most days, I feel horrendous and there she is looking 25 years younger than she is and dancing 8 hrs. a day??? So, I feel like people are looking at me thinking that I am faking or something. I can't put my finger on why this is disturbing me, but it is. Maybe because she is cracking jokes about terminsl cancer and it is hitting too close to home? Anyone else bothered at all by this? Maybe I am just being too sensitive.

Comments

  • mp327
    mp327 Member Posts: 4,440 Member
    #2
    DWTS

    I used to watch that show, but when it became clear that it comes down to popularity and not necessarily dancing ability, I gave it up.  I was taken aback when I heard about her intent to participate.  I don't quite understand it either.  Trying to make people who have never had cancer believe that you can just dance right through it is not reality.  However, I have watched people with cancer and other terminal diseases participate in races and have to say that I do so with much admiration, as long as things are not sugar-coated.  A few months ago, I talked to friends of ours who know a man who has ALS and he and his wife had recently taken a trip to Antarctic, of all places.  I guess it comes down to what a person's dreams are and making them come true before the end arrives.       

  • eihtak
    eihtak Member Posts: 1,473 Member
    #3
    Marynb.....

    At first I was a little confused by the announcement of Valerie Harper to the cast, not disturbed so much, but puzzeled. Then, after thinking about it, DWTS is just a reality show and the ratings have been dropping, so even if she is only on it for a short time, which I believe will be the case, she will initially bring in viewers. I was involved with dance in one form or another more than half my life, ( a dance major for a while in college) and appreciate the effort made in a variety of venues, but my favorite "dance" competition show is "So You Think You Can Dance"....... some amazing talent there. Valerie claims that she has had a great reaction to her treatment and very little symptoms or side effects, she may also be at the point of not really denial, but more of "ok, this is the deal, I can't change it, so I'm going to give it all I got till I go" without thinking about how difficult that may be on her body?????? Who knows, I will watch the first few days to see how she does though, so as I said.....ratings.

  • Marynb
    Marynb Member Posts: 1,118
    #4
    mp327 said:

    DWTS

    I used to watch that show, but when it became clear that it comes down to popularity and not necessarily dancing ability, I gave it up.  I was taken aback when I heard about her intent to participate.  I don't quite understand it either.  Trying to make people who have never had cancer believe that you can just dance right through it is not reality.  However, I have watched people with cancer and other terminal diseases participate in races and have to say that I do so with much admiration, as long as things are not sugar-coated.  A few months ago, I talked to friends of ours who know a man who has ALS and he and his wife had recently taken a trip to Antarctic, of all places.  I guess it comes down to what a person's dreams are and making them come true before the end arrives.       

    Sugar coating
    I guess that is the word that best describes how I feel. My best friend died of brain cancer a year ago and let me tell you, it was really, really painful and horrible. I don't understand how she could be so well and so close to death? Oh, well. I may just be overly sensitive as I get close to the anniversary of my friend's death this fall.
  • eihtak
    eihtak Member Posts: 1,473 Member
    #5
    Marynb said:

    Sugar coating
    I guess that is the word that best describes how I feel. My best friend died of brain cancer a year ago and let me tell you, it was really, really painful and horrible. I don't understand how she could be so well and so close to death? Oh, well. I may just be overly sensitive as I get close to the anniversary of my friend's death this fall.

    Marynb....

    Sensitivity is an emotion to be valued, there are way too many insensitive people in the world!  I am sorry that your friend suffered so horribly. I don't know much about brain cancers at this point but would imagine like many other cancers everyone has a different personal journey. I know what you mean about having someone diagnosed at the point Valerie was and then giving the impression that she is breezing her way through this on the dance floor could send a wrong message, but this is her path and what she feels she needs to do. Also.....she probably has access to the best medical team along with hair, make-up, costume, etc. and all the behind the scenes help to make it look easy!  Do you ever wonder what this would all be like for us if we were in the entertainment industry?

  • Marynb
    Marynb Member Posts: 1,118
    #6
    eihtak said:

    Marynb....

    Sensitivity is an emotion to be valued, there are way too many insensitive people in the world!  I am sorry that your friend suffered so horribly. I don't know much about brain cancers at this point but would imagine like many other cancers everyone has a different personal journey. I know what you mean about having someone diagnosed at the point Valerie was and then giving the impression that she is breezing her way through this on the dance floor could send a wrong message, but this is her path and what she feels she needs to do. Also.....she probably has access to the best medical team along with hair, make-up, costume, etc. and all the behind the scenes help to make it look easy!  Do you ever wonder what this would all be like for us if we were in the entertainment industry?

    Eihtak!
    It would be really great if all cancer patients had hair and makeup people waiting in the wings! Lol. I do hope it all goes well for her!
  • Lorikat
    Lorikat Member Posts: 681 Member
    #7
    eihtak said:

    Marynb.....

    At first I was a little confused by the announcement of Valerie Harper to the cast, not disturbed so much, but puzzeled. Then, after thinking about it, DWTS is just a reality show and the ratings have been dropping, so even if she is only on it for a short time, which I believe will be the case, she will initially bring in viewers. I was involved with dance in one form or another more than half my life, ( a dance major for a while in college) and appreciate the effort made in a variety of venues, but my favorite "dance" competition show is "So You Think You Can Dance"....... some amazing talent there. Valerie claims that she has had a great reaction to her treatment and very little symptoms or side effects, she may also be at the point of not really denial, but more of "ok, this is the deal, I can't change it, so I'm going to give it all I got till I go" without thinking about how difficult that may be on her body?????? Who knows, I will watch the first few days to see how she does though, so as I said.....ratings.

    My brother-in-law was

    My brother-in-law was diagnosed with gleoblastoma (brain tumer). He went into "remission" but one day, out of the blue, he had a seizure and everything was down hill...  He died within months and it was horrible!   it SCARES me that she will hurt herself or even someone else trying this.  She is 74 with a BRAIN TUMOR for heavens sake!  

     

  • Marynb
    Marynb Member Posts: 1,118
    #8
    Lorikat said:

    My brother-in-law was

    My brother-in-law was diagnosed with gleoblastoma (brain tumer). He went into "remission" but one day, out of the blue, he had a seizure and everything was down hill...  He died within months and it was horrible!   it SCARES me that she will hurt herself or even someone else trying this.  She is 74 with a BRAIN TUMOR for heavens sake!  

     

    Exactly!
    I just hope the show isn't live!
  • danker
    danker Member Posts: 1,276 Member
    #9
    mp327 said:

    DWTS

    I used to watch that show, but when it became clear that it comes down to popularity and not necessarily dancing ability, I gave it up.  I was taken aback when I heard about her intent to participate.  I don't quite understand it either.  Trying to make people who have never had cancer believe that you can just dance right through it is not reality.  However, I have watched people with cancer and other terminal diseases participate in races and have to say that I do so with much admiration, as long as things are not sugar-coated.  A few months ago, I talked to friends of ours who know a man who has ALS and he and his wife had recently taken a trip to Antarctic, of all places.  I guess it comes down to what a person's dreams are and making them come true before the end arrives.       

    dwts

    I don't normally get on this forum.  Cancer is not a terminal disease!!! Life is!!!  I had colorectal cancer in 2010. A resection with complications left me NED(no evidence of disease)in 2011

    .  I now live a normal(?) life.  Hope you too beat it !!!

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