Mom Stage IV.

MadeInMichigan

fatbob2010 said:

So Sorry

So sorry to hear this, has to be hard for you.  Yes, time does seem to go too fast.  Not only hard for you, but also can be unbearable for your Mom.  I hope that you can find comfort in the time you have with her.  Comfort and peace to all of you.  Art

Thank you.
Just thought I'd

Thank you.

Just thought I'd also say that she's started to skip chemo on some days, and she doesn't reschedule when she does. Today was supposed to be her long day (four hours) and she decided not to go. It also seems like she complains about pain more often now, and also sleeps more.

Maybe she'll reschedule today's since it was four hours. Anyone else skipped an appointment?

annalexandria

MadeInMichigan said:

Thank you.
Just thought I'd

Thank you.

Just thought I'd also say that she's started to skip chemo on some days, and she doesn't reschedule when she does. Today was supposed to be her long day (four hours) and she decided not to go. It also seems like she complains about pain more often now, and also sleeps more.

Maybe she'll reschedule today's since it was four hours. Anyone else skipped an appointment?

Hi again, MIM.

Thanks for coming back to update us.  I would say that skipping an appointment at this stage of things is not surprising.  In fact, given that your mom's condition is apparently terminal (and I'm just so sorry to hear that), it may be time for your family to have an open discussion about what's going on.  This will be very hard to do (depending on a family's approach to communication, maybe impossible), but if the chemo is not working, as the rise in CEA suggests, is there a reason for your mom to continue on a debilitating chemo regimen?

Has your mom had any scans lately to see what's going on?  Has there been any discussion of hospice being involved at this point?  Hospice tends to be really good at pain management, and it sounds like your mom needs that now.  And it doesn't mean that death is imminent, just that there is no longer expectation for a cure.

I hope I'm not being too direct here, but I imagine you want whatever time is left for your mom to be as comfortable as possible.  Talking directly about some of these issues with other people in the family may help you to have a better understanding of why things are being done, and what to expect.

I've gone through this with my sister, and it's a terrible experience. Big hugs coming your way. 

MadeInMichigan

annalexandria said:

Hi again, MIM.

Thanks for coming back to update us.  I would say that skipping an appointment at this stage of things is not surprising.  In fact, given that your mom's condition is apparently terminal (and I'm just so sorry to hear that), it may be time for your family to have an open discussion about what's going on.  This will be very hard to do (depending on a family's approach to communication, maybe impossible), but if the chemo is not working, as the rise in CEA suggests, is there a reason for your mom to continue on a debilitating chemo regimen?

Has your mom had any scans lately to see what's going on?  Has there been any discussion of hospice being involved at this point?  Hospice tends to be really good at pain management, and it sounds like your mom needs that now.  And it doesn't mean that death is imminent, just that there is no longer expectation for a cure.

I hope I'm not being too direct here, but I imagine you want whatever time is left for your mom to be as comfortable as possible.  Talking directly about some of these issues with other people in the family may help you to have a better understanding of why things are being done, and what to expect.

I've gone through this with my sister, and it's a terrible experience. Big hugs coming your way. 

Another update -- more pain

Another update -- more pain to the point of tears. Constant. She was just at the doctor today and he prescribed a new pain killer since Vicodin isn't working.

As far as I know for a scan, I think she's either getting one later this month, or next month for sure. It's been a big bummer because it's like she sleeps until late in the afternoon, wakes up, goes to her aunt's house to smoke (since she can smoke inside there), comes home at midnight or later, and repeats. She's almost never home. I'm not sure she even needs another scan to know what's going on though.

I'll post again soon. It's sad that it's at the point now where she's not home so often that it almost feels like she's already gone.

teamzach

MadeInMichigan said:

Another Update.

Her numbers went down, but I heard her talking on the phone and apparently her doctor told her (but she didn't tell me) she has about 6mo/1yr left if she's lucky. I know to go day-by-day, but it's already been 6 months since I made this thread. Time goes by a bit too fast.

Take a trip...

I know this seems silly, but see where your mom would like to go. My husband and I went to disneyland 5 months before he passed. The memories we made were amazing. His laughter, well.. I still remember it like it was yesterday. Praying for you and your sweet mom. I am so sorry you have to deal with this stupid disease. It is just not fair.

Janelle

teamzach

MadeInMichigan said:

Another update -- more pain

Another update -- more pain to the point of tears. Constant. She was just at the doctor today and he prescribed a new pain killer since Vicodin isn't working.

As far as I know for a scan, I think she's either getting one later this month, or next month for sure. It's been a big bummer because it's like she sleeps until late in the afternoon, wakes up, goes to her aunt's house to smoke (since she can smoke inside there), comes home at midnight or later, and repeats. She's almost never home. I'm not sure she even needs another scan to know what's going on though.

I'll post again soon. It's sad that it's at the point now where she's not home so often that it almost feels like she's already gone.

It may be time

It may be time for hospice. The nice thing is that they not only help with managing pain, but they have an amazing group of people who can just be there to listen to her...or to you. They can explain as little or as much as you would like. Just be there for her in whatever manner she needs.

Blessings,

Janelle