Nearly 2 weeks without my father

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  • ManuelMalta
    ManuelMalta Member Posts: 14
    #22
    gsb1773 said:

    I lost my mom 2 yrs ago. She

    I lost my mom 2 yrs ago. She had the dreaded alziemers,but she had a stroke.My mama is my everything.I will always miss her,but I know she is at a good place,where she is happy and in no more pain.I am a very spiritual person,and she is always around me.She stills lives on in spirit.Your loves ones that has pass on,would want you to go on with your life,they want you to be happy.My mom is not suffering no more and she didn't have to go to a nursing home.Ask God for strenght and wisdom,he won't help unless you ask.The comfort part is when it is my time to go my mama wil be waiting for me.God Bless and talk to God,cause God would never leave you.

    Grief

    Back to square one with my mum. She's driving me crazy. First she blames me that all this happened because of me, then she keeps reminding me of the times me and dad fought, which gives me this deep sense of guilt, now she's always like "You didn't love your day. You already forgot about him just after a month and a half of his death". I'm still waiting on the psikologist to call me to start the sessions. In the meantime, I ended up 24/7 in my room, literally no work, no going out nothing, ruining my eyes on the pc and tv, and banging my head against the wardrobe, trying to get myself dizzy maybe I end up passing out and pass the time knocked out. Pretty good life if you ask me. All that's left is for me to overdose on something maybe I get out of this hell. it's either that or I lay my hands on mum. Either way, it's gonna be ugly

  • FourBee
    FourBee Member Posts: 52 Member
    #23
    ManuelMalta said:

    Grief

    Back to square one with my mum. She's driving me crazy. First she blames me that all this happened because of me, then she keeps reminding me of the times me and dad fought, which gives me this deep sense of guilt, now she's always like "You didn't love your day. You already forgot about him just after a month and a half of his death". I'm still waiting on the psikologist to call me to start the sessions. In the meantime, I ended up 24/7 in my room, literally no work, no going out nothing, ruining my eyes on the pc and tv, and banging my head against the wardrobe, trying to get myself dizzy maybe I end up passing out and pass the time knocked out. Pretty good life if you ask me. All that's left is for me to overdose on something maybe I get out of this hell. it's either that or I lay my hands on mum. Either way, it's gonna be ugly

    Grief Therapy

    Dear Manuel, Please seek out some grief group therapy where you will learn that what you are feeling is normal. Do not harm yourself or your mother as you are both still in shock and suffering enough. Visit a primary care physician and if you must get some anti-depressants. You won't get addicted but you also won't feel so intensely. They take several weeks to start working so go straight away and find out if it may be an interim solution for you. Most important is that you find someone to talk to. I know what you mean about your dad's last day as my dad was the same and he died in February. It bothers me less now but still more than I'd like. Wishing you the very best for a bright future. Your dad would want that for you. Bee

  • grandmafay
    grandmafay Member Posts: 1,633 Member
    #24
    ManuelMalta said:

    Grief

    Back to square one with my mum. She's driving me crazy. First she blames me that all this happened because of me, then she keeps reminding me of the times me and dad fought, which gives me this deep sense of guilt, now she's always like "You didn't love your day. You already forgot about him just after a month and a half of his death". I'm still waiting on the psikologist to call me to start the sessions. In the meantime, I ended up 24/7 in my room, literally no work, no going out nothing, ruining my eyes on the pc and tv, and banging my head against the wardrobe, trying to get myself dizzy maybe I end up passing out and pass the time knocked out. Pretty good life if you ask me. All that's left is for me to overdose on something maybe I get out of this hell. it's either that or I lay my hands on mum. Either way, it's gonna be ugly

    Get Out and About

    During  one of my really down periods, I stayed at home eating nothing but jelly beans and vinegar potato chips. Not a good combination. I finally pulled myself together and rejoined the world. Now, I make a point of getting out at least once a day, often to lunch. Sometimes, I call a friend. Other times I go alone, but I go. Isolation is not good. I'm sorry you and your mom continue to have problems. I know she is hurting and taking it out on you. Losing my husband was devastating. Each of you is grieving in your own way. Sadly, it doesn't sound like either of you are dealing with your grief in healthy ways. Find someone to talk with pester the psychologist for an earlier appointment. Keep pestering him. Tell whoever you are talking to about the appointment that you have considered hurting yourself. just get help. You can do this. Fay

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