Stage 3

jubillee
jubillee Member Posts: 5
in Anal Cancer #1

My husband has just started undergoing treatment for Stage 3b Anal cancer.

The onc says it is in some lymph nodes in his groin and in the pelvic region.

It is also pushing 5mm into his prostate.

I am so scared I am going to lose him.

Comments

  • Marynb
    Marynb Member Posts: 1,118
    #2
    Jubilee
    I am sorry that your husband has to go through this treatment. He is lucky to have you to help him through this. I know it must bring fear to you and it must be difficult to remain strong so you can care for him. I am glad that you found this board. There are a lot of caring people who have survived this cancer and it is a good source for you to ask questions and seek support.

    I hope that you have found a very reputable cancer hospital for treatments. It really matters.

    Your husband will be in my prayers.
  • mp327
    mp327 Member Posts: 4,440 Member
    #3
    Hi jubillee--

    I'm sorry to hear of your husband's diagnosis.  However, there are many stories of survival in cases of 3b anal cancer, so please be hopeful!  I have been on cancer support sites for over 4 years now and have communicated with many 3b survivors who are doing well--some have surpassed the 5-year survivor mark.  I can understand your fear, as cancer is a scary thing.  I hope you have found a good medical team and facility for your husband's treatment and that he gets through the next few weeks with a minimum of side effects.  Please know that we are here for you and if you have any questions on dealing with any side effects, someone here will have some good suggestions.  Most of us have been through this same treatment and we have all learned helpful things along the way, which we are eager to share.  I wish your husband all the best and hope you'll keep us posted on his progress through treatment and beyond.  Be sure to take care of yourself along the way too! 

  • eihtak
    eihtak Member Posts: 1,473 Member
    #4
    Welcome....

    I am sorry that you or anyone has to be here (discusing anal cancer), but sooo happy that we have this place to come to. I am 2yrs post treatment now for Stage 3b anal cancer, I also had pelvic lymph node involvement. I did need a colostomy prior to beginning treatment that unfortunately has not been reversed, but other than that, most of us have received the same treatment regardless of Stage1 or 3, so that may be encouraging. I am in another support group that has a man who is 11yrs post treatment for Stage3 and doing great back to work on heavy machinery no less!! I am female so can not relate to the prostate interference, but there are other men that will chime in I'm sure. As your husband progresses through treatment please post any questions or concerns he/you may have.....this site is helpful in a way that even the best doctors (unless they have been in our shoes) can just not relate. I myself am doing well and fully expect to be here doing well for a long time.....I'll bet your husband will to!

    I will have you both in my thoughts and prayers as you move forward.

  • jubillee
    jubillee Member Posts: 5
    #5
    eihtak said:

    Welcome....

    I am sorry that you or anyone has to be here (discusing anal cancer), but sooo happy that we have this place to come to. I am 2yrs post treatment now for Stage 3b anal cancer, I also had pelvic lymph node involvement. I did need a colostomy prior to beginning treatment that unfortunately has not been reversed, but other than that, most of us have received the same treatment regardless of Stage1 or 3, so that may be encouraging. I am in another support group that has a man who is 11yrs post treatment for Stage3 and doing great back to work on heavy machinery no less!! I am female so can not relate to the prostate interference, but there are other men that will chime in I'm sure. As your husband progresses through treatment please post any questions or concerns he/you may have.....this site is helpful in a way that even the best doctors (unless they have been in our shoes) can just not relate. I myself am doing well and fully expect to be here doing well for a long time.....I'll bet your husband will to!

    I will have you both in my thoughts and prayers as you move forward.

    Thank you

    Thank you for your good wishes. I am a 15 year survivor of cancer myself (only stage 2 cervical though)  but have found it so much harder to watch the person I love go

    through it than when it was myself. 

  • mp327
    mp327 Member Posts: 4,440 Member
    #6
    jubillee said:

    Thank you

    Thank you for your good wishes. I am a 15 year survivor of cancer myself (only stage 2 cervical though)  but have found it so much harder to watch the person I love go

    through it than when it was myself. 

    jubillee

    I think you would find that many caregivers have felt the same way.  In my case, I was the one going through cancer and I was SO thankful it was me and not my husband.  I knew it was much easier for me to deal with such a thing than watch someone else go through it.  I think how you feel is pretty normal.  You might see if you can find a support group for caregivers.  Perhaps that would ease your anxiety.  Just a suggestion.

  • joane0328
    joane0328 Member Posts: 14
    #7
    Hi,
    I was diagnosed in August

    Hi,

    I was diagnosed in August 2012 as stage 3B with 7 cm tumor and pelvic and sacral lymph node involvement. Finished 6 1/2 weeks  IMRT and 2 courses of chemo on 10/31/12, with clean CT end of Dec 2012. Need to undergo anal biospy was planned in March but needed to postpone due to thyroidectomy for thyroid cancer. 

    While the guideline provide a ( to me) low 5 yr survival rate (43%) I feel I have to remain hopeful in order to survive. Worse case scenario if biospy is positive is surgery and living with a colostomy which is not a deal breaker at all for me. 

    I am a 56 yr old single femaie with a nursing background.( cardiac nursing) so my knowledge of cancer and treatment was new for me.

    Good Luck to you and your husband.

    Joan

  • sandysp
    sandysp Member Posts: 868 Member
    #8
    mp327 said:

    Hi jubillee--

    I'm sorry to hear of your husband's diagnosis.  However, there are many stories of survival in cases of 3b anal cancer, so please be hopeful!  I have been on cancer support sites for over 4 years now and have communicated with many 3b survivors who are doing well--some have surpassed the 5-year survivor mark.  I can understand your fear, as cancer is a scary thing.  I hope you have found a good medical team and facility for your husband's treatment and that he gets through the next few weeks with a minimum of side effects.  Please know that we are here for you and if you have any questions on dealing with any side effects, someone here will have some good suggestions.  Most of us have been through this same treatment and we have all learned helpful things along the way, which we are eager to share.  I wish your husband all the best and hope you'll keep us posted on his progress through treatment and beyond.  Be sure to take care of yourself along the way too! 

    Boston

    Did you run this? Are you okay?

    Love,

    Sandy

  • sandysp
    sandysp Member Posts: 868 Member
    #9
    mp327 said:

    jubillee

    I think you would find that many caregivers have felt the same way.  In my case, I was the one going through cancer and I was SO thankful it was me and not my husband.  I knew it was much easier for me to deal with such a thing than watch someone else go through it.  I think how you feel is pretty normal.  You might see if you can find a support group for caregivers.  Perhaps that would ease your anxiety.  Just a suggestion.

    My feelings exactly!

    Re Martha's post:

    I often told my husband I was glad it was me and not him. Being a guy, I guess, he didn't understand this. But I would have found it much more difficult (and hear) than go through it myself.

    God bless you. Stay close to the board. It will help you a lot.

    All the best,

    Sandy

  • mp327
    mp327 Member Posts: 4,440 Member
    #10
    sandysp said:

    Boston

    Did you run this? Are you okay?

    Love,

    Sandy

    Hi Sandy!

    I am fine and was not in Boston.  Thank you for your concern--that touches my heart so much! 

    I am keeping all the victims of this horrible act in my thoughts and prayers. 

    Love you, my friend!

  • islandgirlculebra
    islandgirlculebra Member Posts: 155 Member
    #11
    eihtak said:

    Welcome....

    I am sorry that you or anyone has to be here (discusing anal cancer), but sooo happy that we have this place to come to. I am 2yrs post treatment now for Stage 3b anal cancer, I also had pelvic lymph node involvement. I did need a colostomy prior to beginning treatment that unfortunately has not been reversed, but other than that, most of us have received the same treatment regardless of Stage1 or 3, so that may be encouraging. I am in another support group that has a man who is 11yrs post treatment for Stage3 and doing great back to work on heavy machinery no less!! I am female so can not relate to the prostate interference, but there are other men that will chime in I'm sure. As your husband progresses through treatment please post any questions or concerns he/you may have.....this site is helpful in a way that even the best doctors (unless they have been in our shoes) can just not relate. I myself am doing well and fully expect to be here doing well for a long time.....I'll bet your husband will to!

    I will have you both in my thoughts and prayers as you move forward.

    Thanks Eihtak

    Just wanted to say thanks for sharing your info. and the info. on the 11 year survivor of Stage 3 anal cancer. Mine was Stage 3b also; I find myself worrying about this coming back. Wish I could put this all out of my mind but it comes and goes. Hearing about an 11 year survivor is very encouraging. Thanks so much.

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